Conflict is one of the most paradoxical things I’ve encountered—in my own life and in the lives of my clients. For those of us who have been shaped by good girl conditioning, conflict most often feels like danger and disconnection. But when it happens within a container of safety and self-connection, it becomes a doorway to vulnerability, intimacy, and power. In this episode, I explore why we avoid conflict and share personal stories that demonstrate the freedom you can find when you say what needs to be said. Here’s what I cover:

• How the emotional burden of unspoken words lives in the body
• How cultural and gender conditioning teach people socialized as women to stay silent
• Two real-life examples of how I apply what I teach about conflict and communication
• Why self-love and compassion are essential for knowing when and how to speak up
• How practicing the skills to have hard conversations leads to freedom and connection

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

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Because every one of us has been raised with the good girl rules—to be nice, agreeable, and never rock the boat—almost every woman I work with has the habit of over-apologizing. You’re capable, you’re accomplished, and you work hard, yet “sorry” slips out at the beginning of every sentence. In this episode, we explore how over-apologizing hurts you and how to practice a different way of showing up. Here’s what I cover:

• How over-apologizing lowers your authority in other people's eyes and trains your own brain to see yourself as less valuable
• Why it’s important to consider what you’re trying to accomplish with your apology
• Why pausing before you speak is the foundation for breaking your over-apologizing habit
• The power you’ll reclaim when you replace “I’m sorry” with “thank you”
• Why increasing your capacity for discomfort is key to stopping over-apologizing
• A practical homework assignment to complete your own apology audit



Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult

Do you edit parts of yourself out of relationships because you're afraid of how people will react? Do you self-silence when you know what you have to say might not be pleasing to others? There is real discomfort in showing up authentically because it means risking rejection from the people we’re closest to. But the alternative comes with its own pain: the sadness and loneliness of not being seen for who we truly are. Neither type of discomfort is easy to face, but in this episode, I share how you can choose between them and take small, brave steps toward relationships where you can be fully seen. Here’s what I cover:

• The two types of discomfort that people pleasing creates in relationships
• Why it’s easy to choose authenticity in some relationships but not others—and why that difficulty is completely normal
• A personal story about a friendship where I felt the pull between hiding and being seen
• Why loving the parts of yourself that used to hide is essential for change
• Questions to help you identify where you can choose authenticity in your relationships

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult

When you’re asked to take on extra work, stay late at the office, or do a favor for a friend or family member, do you ever say “yes” automatically, without thinking about what it will actually cost you? This habit is known as auto-accommodating, and it’s so common among people pleasers that I've decided to dedicate an episode to it. In this episode, we explore the programming behind auto-accommodating and how to practice pausing before you respond so your answer is actually aligned with your needs and desires. Here’s what I cover:​

• How we are programmed to conflate accommodation with reward, safety, and connection
• 3 questions to help you understand the part of yourself that habitually auto-accommodates
• How toxic capitalism reinforces the idea that our worth comes from serving others at our own expense
• Why going back and revising an automatic “yes” will help you build your pause muscle
• How to avoid self-judgment around your fear of saying “no”
• A phrase to use when you want to contribute without auto-accommodating

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult

Have you ever caught yourself in a self-doubt spiral, wondering if you’re overreacting, if you’re missing something, or if everyone else just knows better than you? The experience of self-doubt is so familiar for women, especially because of the patriarchal system we live in. But you deserve to feel confident in your emotions and your assessments. In this episode, I dive into why it feels so automatic to doubt ourselves and how you can begin to change that inner monologue. Here’s what I cover:

• What internal self-doubt actually sounds like
• Examples of behaviors that stem from self-doubt
• How Dr. Becky Kennedy explains the development of self-doubt in children
• How patriarchy gives boys and girls very different messages about the validity of their self-doubt
• The two voices inside us as women—the voice of care and the voice of self–and how to balance them
• An exercise to help you work with both voices so you can feel more confident

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult

I’m so excited to welcome Katherine Golub to the podcast today. Katherine and I have so much in common–not only our journeys of breaking free from good girl rules, but also our commitment to community organizing and social change. She is a coach for leaders and activists who want to continue showing up for their communities without burning out. In this conversation, we explore the polarity between personal and collective needs, and how radical discernment can help you step into the life you want. Here’s what we cover:

• Why we have to choose to take care of our needs before we can do so
• The definition of radical discernment and how it helps balance personal and collective care
• What resonance actually looks like and how it can help when you're overwhelmed
• The importance of only focusing on the next right thing
• How curiosity can help when it’s difficult to imagine what you want

Find Katherine here:

https://callingsandcourage.com/

https://callingsandcourage.com/podcasts/

https://www.instagram.com/katherinegolub/

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult

In this conversation, I’m joined by the author of Sovereign, hypnotist, and fellow ex-Mormon, Michaelann Gardner. Sovereign explores chronic pain, marriage, and faith in a way that connects to the experiences and stories of so many women—even those who don’t share the same religious background. It’s about sex, disordered eating, and divorce, but it’s also about finding your desire and allowing it to guide you into a promised land that may look different from what you imagined. Here’s what we cover:

• How the story of Adam and Eve became a framework to explore ideas about faith, bodies, and reconciliation
• How the wisdom of desire can act as a powerful guide if we trust it to lead us
• The reawakening of hunger and desire as a catalyst for telling the truth to ourselves and others
• How cultural conditioning impacts the way both men and women show up in marriage and sex
• The disconnect between the church’s view of sex as “sacred” and the lived experience of sex
• How the pain of disconnection and dishonesty manifests in the bodies

Find Michaelann here:

https://michaelanngardner.com/

https://www.instagram.com/michaelann.gardner

https://www.amazon.com/Sovereign-Michaelann-Gardner/dp/1961471175

Find Sara here:

https://sarafisk.coach

https://pages.sarafisk.coach/difficultconversations

https://www.instagram.com/sarafiskcoach/

https://www.facebook.com/SaraFiskCoaching/

https://www.tiktok.com/@sarafiskcoach

https://www.youtube.com/@sarafiskcoaching1333

What happens inside the free Stop People Pleasing Facebook Community? Our goal is to provide help and guidance on your journey to eliminate people pleasing and perfectionism from your life. We heal best in a safe community where we can grow and learn together and celebrate and encourage each other. This group is for posting questions about or experiences with material learned in The Ex-Good Girl podcast, Sara Fisk Coaching social media posts or the free webinars and trainings provided by Sara Fisk Coaching. See you inside!

Book a Free Consult