Nighttime wasn’t rest for Diego—it was danger. As a child, he was sexually abused during overnight stays with family, and his body learned that darkness meant vulnerability. Decades later, he couldn’t sleep, woke with panic attacks, kept lights on, and stayed awake until sunrise “just in case.”

In this episode, we explore how nighttime trauma rewires the brain, suppresses REM sleep, reverses cortisol cycles, and creates lifelong insomnia. We walk through how Diego reclaimed safety in the dark—not by forcing sleep, but by teaching his nervous system that night no longer equals danger.

If nighttime is where your past returns, this episode is for you.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Ready to give it try:

Life by Your Design

Every man carries a story about his father — what he gave, what he withheld, and what that silence taught us about manhood. For male survivors of childhood sexual abuse, that silence often becomes a second trauma — the one that keeps the first wound from ever healing. What happens when the man you needed most couldn’t see you? In this episode, Jack shares his journey from silence and performance to presence and healing. Discover how childhood sexual abuse and father hunger intertwine — and how one man rewired the story of manhood by becoming the father he never had.

If you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, hit send I read every message — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Ready to give it try:

Life by Your Design

For some male survivors, the mask isn’t anger or success — it’s immaturity. They stay in perpetual adolescence, avoiding responsibility, dodging commitment, and joking their way through life. To the outside world, they look carefree. But inside, they’re stuck.

In this episode, Antonne shares how childhood sexual abuse froze his development, leaving him a grown man still living like a teenager. He opens up about sabotaging relationships, struggling as a father, and fearing that he could never step into real manhood.

We explore how trauma wires the brain to chase novelty and escape, why responsibility feels like danger, and the coaching steps that helped Antonne move from avoidance to accountability.

This is the raw truth about Peter Pan Syndrome — and the reminder that growing up doesn’t mean losing joy, it means finding freedom.

If you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, send email. I read every message — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Ready to give it try:

Life by Your Design

Luis thought sex was survival — but in adulthood, performance left him anxious and disconnected. Discover how trauma rewires intimacy, and how he reclaimed the bedroom as a place of safety and connection.

If you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, hit the send email. I read every message — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Zeke looked like the picture of success — a corporate VP, sharp suit, life of the party. But behind the mask was a man carrying brutal abuse from his father, risky behaviors, and suicidal thoughts. To protect his career, he couldn’t risk traditional therapy. Instead, he turned to coaching — and discovered how to unmask without losing everything he’d built.

In this raw episode, we explore how high-functioning survivors hide in plain sight, the neuroscience behind perfectionism and risky escapes, and the steps Zeke took to break free from his double life.

f you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, email. I read every message — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Grief feels dangerous for male survivors — but avoiding it comes at a cost. In this episode, Tariq’s story reveals how burying grief turns into anger and exhaustion, and how permission to grieve can unlock real freedom.

If you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, send email. I read every message — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Denial looks like safety, but it’s really a trap. William’s story shows how denial numbs the pain of childhood abuse — and how it quietly wrecks work, relationships, and health. Discover why the brain clings to denial, and one simple way to start breaking free.

If you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, send email. I read my messages — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com

Shame doesn’t just show up — it moves in, uninvited, the moment a boy is abused. In this first episode, Xander shares how silence and secrecy buried his voice, and how shame followed him into every corner of adult life: work, relationships, even his own body. We’ll break down where that shame really comes from, the neuroscience behind why it sticks, and one simple strategy you can use today to start pushing shame back out the door.

If you’ve ever felt like shame defines you, this episode will show you the truth: shame is not your identity.

If you have questions, or you just want to share what you’re dealing with, send me an email. I read my messages — your thoughts and your story matter here.

With you in this, Coach Thomas Break My Abuse Code™ | www.BetterMaleSurvivors.com