Eating disorders don’t have a gender. But for years, the conversations, support systems and public understanding surrounding them have often made men feel like they don’t belong.
James Roffey knows what that feels like.
In this episode of Mental Reset, James shares his personal experience of living with an eating disorder, the challenges of seeking help and what happens when you’re struggling with something that society doesn’t expect men to struggle with.
At a time when James desperately needed understanding, there were very few male voices speaking openly about eating disorders. No relatable role models. Nobody showing him that men could experience these difficulties too.
He recalls being told by a therapist that he was the first man they had worked with. Support groups were predominantly female, leaving him feeling isolated.
And that raises an important question.
How many men are struggling in silence simply because they don’t recognise themselves in the conversations around mental health?
James’s battle with anorexia and bulimia lasted almost a decade. At just 21 years old, he was on life support, with his kidneys and liver failing.
The impact extended far beyond James himself. His parents were forced to put locks on doors in their own home, and his dad considered selling the family house to pay for treatment.
But through everything, his parents never gave up on him. James believes that’s the reason he’s still here today.
We explore the pressures surrounding male body image, the pursuit of the ‘ideal’ physique and how society’s expectations of masculinity can make recognising and discussing an eating disorder even more difficult.
We also discuss body dysmorphia, exercise, muscle-building culture and the potential risks associated with performance-enhancing drugs.
Because eating disorders don’t always look the way people expect.
For some men, the struggle can be hidden behind fitness, discipline, training or the relentless pursuit of looking a certain way.
But James’s story isn’t just about the difficulties he experienced.
It’s about finding the courage to speak openly about something that was once surrounded by shame and silence.
About understanding that asking for support doesn’t make you less of a man.
And about becoming the kind of voice and representation he wishes had existed when he needed it most.
One of the things we believe strongly at Mental Reset is that lived experience matters. Professional support is important, but sometimes hearing somebody say, “I’ve been there too,” can make an enormous difference.
James is helping to create those conversations for men who may never have felt comfortable speaking about their own experiences.
And that’s something worth celebrating.
This is James Roffey’s story. A conversation about eating disorders, masculinity, body image, vulnerability and the power of being heard.
If something in James’s story resonates with you, or reminds you of somebody you care about, please share this episode.
You never know who might be waiting to hear that they’re not alone.
NEED SUPPORT?
If you or someone you know is struggling, please reach out for support.
Samaritans: Call 116 123 free, 24 hours a day
Shout: Text SHOUT to 85258 for free, confidential 24/7 text support
NHS 111: Call 111 or use NHS 111 online for urgent health or mental health advice
Your GP: Contact your GP surgery for ongoing mental health support
999: If you or somebody else is in immediate danger or there is an immediate risk to life, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E.
You don’t have to wait until things reach crisis point to ask for help.
Connect With James:
https://www.instagram.com/ultimatebodymind?dlrf=MWg5djAwM3BqNW51Yw%3D%3D&utm_source=qr
https://www.linkedin.com/in/ultimatebodyandmind?utm_source=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=member_ios
www.ultimatebodyandmind.com