In this episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea unpack thought distortions—those automatic, convincing thoughts we accept as absolute truth without ever questioning. From “I’ll never be good at this” to “They must be mad at me,” they explore how distorted thinking shapes our behavior, limits our lives, and keeps us stuck in survival mode.

Through relatable examples, humor, and honest self-reflection (including a memorable Rubik’s Cube story), they break down common distortions like all-or-nothing thinking, catastrophizing, mind reading, emotional reasoning, personalization, and “should” statements. They explain why these patterns form, how they’re passed down through families and culture, and how the brain uses them as a way to stay safe—not necessarily to help us grow.

The conversation also offers practical tools for recognizing when you’re in a distortion, including noticing extremes, negative self-talk, and body-based signals of shutdown. April and Andrea share gentle ways to interrupt distorted thinking through awareness, curiosity, grounding exercises, and choosing thoughts that feel kinder and more regulating—rather than harsher or punishing.

This episode is an invitation to loosen your grip on thoughts that feel true but may not be accurate, and to discover how much more possibility opens up when you stop believing everything you think.

Episode 15In this episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea unpack the often-confused patterns of people pleasing and overgiving—how they’re similar, how they’re different, and why they both come from the same place: the need to feel safe.Through honest reflection and decades-long friendship, they explore how people pleasing focuses on keeping others happy to avoid conflict, while overgiving shows up as rescuing, fixing, and taking responsibility for other people’s emotions. Both patterns, while adaptive in childhood, can quietly lead to burnout, resentment, loss of self, and deeply unbalanced relationships in adulthood.This conversation dives into the nervous system roots of these behaviors, including the fawn response, and how self-denial becomes normalized over time. April and Andrea share real-life examples—from being “the easy one” to ignoring basic needs like hunger or rest—and explain how these habits disconnect us from our own wants, boundaries, and identity.Listeners are guided toward awareness-based tools for change, including naming the pattern when it shows up, tuning into the body, and practicing regulation techniques that help bring us back into the present moment. This episode is an invitation to stop abandoning yourself for connection—and to begin building relationships rooted in authenticity, reciprocity, and self-trust.

In this episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea take an honest, deeply human look at shame—what it is, where it comes from, and why it can feel so paralyzing and all-consuming. They explore how shame is not about what we do, but about who we believe we are, and how quickly it can collapse our sense of self.Drawing from personal experiences, clinical insight, and the foundational work of Brené Brown, they unpack the concept of the shame spiral (or “shame storm”)—those moments when embarrassment, fear, or feeling “in trouble” instantly pulls us into shutdown. They discuss how shame lives in the body, how it’s shaped by childhood, family, school, and society, and why it so often leads to masking, overcompensating, and isolation.This episode also offers practical, body-based tools for navigating shame when it shows up. April and Andrea share simple regulation techniques—like posture shifts, movement, naming the experience, humor, breathwork, and gentle self-soothing—to help bring the nervous system out of collapse and back into safety.Shame thrives in silence, but healing happens in awareness and connection. This conversation is an invitation to meet shame with curiosity instead of judgment—and to remember that you are not broken, defective, or alone.

In this episode, hosts April and Andrea dive into how different generations approach mental health and emotional wellness — from Boomers to Gen X, Millennials, and Gen Z. Together, they unpack the messages each generation was raised with and how those beliefs shaped coping, connection, and self-care.

April and Andrea discuss the impact of “tough it out” mentalities versus today’s emphasis on emotional awareness, what each generation got right, where harm was done, and how unspoken expectations still show up in relationships and healing. From silence and survival to vulnerability and regulation, this conversation explores how generational patterns affect mental health — and how empathy can bridge the gap.

The takeaway is simple: no matter your generation, we all need safety, understanding, and compassion — and it’s never too late to do things differently.

In this episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea explore what joy really is—and why so many of us struggle to access it, even when life looks “good” on the outside. They unpack the difference between happiness and joy, explaining why happiness is often conditional, while joy is a deeper state of being that lives inside the body.The conversation gently weaves through lived experiences of disconnection, trauma, survival mode, and the belief that joy has to be loud or earned. April and Andrea discuss how safety—not perfection or achievement—is the gateway to joy, and why our nervous system prioritizes protection over pleasure when we’re chronically stressed.Listeners are guided through practical, body-based ways to invite joy back in, including nervous system regulation, movement, music, reframing language, and simple somatic tools like tapping and grounding. They also talk about worthiness, self-compassion, and why joy builds resilience—helping us soften disappointment, reduce shame, and reconnect with hope.This episode is an invitation to stop chasing joy outside of yourself and start cultivating it from within—one safe, gentle moment at a time.

In this episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea have an honest, relatable conversation about adult ADHD, what it actually looks like beyond the stereotypes, and why so many people go undiagnosed or misunderstood for years.Together, they explore how ADHD can present in very different ways: chronic lateness and chronic earliness, hyperfocus and distraction, sensory seeking and shutdown. They unpack common experiences like time blindness, rejection sensitivity, demand avoidance, and the constant inner criticism that comes from being told to “just try harder.”The episode also dives into how ADHD intersects with trauma, menopause, hormones, and nervous system regulation and why coping strategies that once worked can suddenly stop working. April and Andrea share practical, compassionate tools for regulation, focus, and daily functioning, including gamifying tasks, using timers, reducing decision fatigue, and working with your brain instead of against it.This conversation is validating, informative, and hopeful, especially for anyone who’s ever felt lazy, broken, or “too much.” ADHD isn’t a character flaw. It’s a nervous system difference and understanding it can change everything.

In this powerful episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea dive deep into one of the hardest skills most of us will ever learn: setting boundaries without guilt. What does it really mean to say “no”—and actually mean it? Why does the word feel so intimidating, especially for people-pleasers, over-givers, and caretakers?

Drawing from real experiences, childhood conditioning, and nervous system insight, they unpack why boundaries often feel “mean,” why so many of us fear disappointing others, and how to finally shift from people-pleasing to true emotional safety.

The conversation explores:

• Why “no” is not only a full sentence—but an act of self-protection

• How boundaries keep us safe (not change others)

• What to do when people push back against your new limits

• Why guilt isn’t guilt—it’s discomfort

• How worthiness and nervous system regulation connect to boundary-setting

• Scripts, examples, and language to make boundaries easier in real life

• The “Coke Machine Response”—and why people push harder when you change

With honesty, humor, and practical tools, April and Andrea remind us that boundaries aren’t about controlling others—they’re about choosing you. And the more you practice, the safer, stronger, and more empowered you’ll feel.

In this episode of Healing Doesn’t Have to Hurt, April and Andrea dive into two very real—and very different—experiences: FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) and JOMO (Joy of Missing Out). Through laughter, honesty, and personal stories, they explore how each one shows up in daily life, how they affect our relationships, and what’s happening in the brain and body when either takes over.

Andrea shares what it’s like to constantly chase connection and opportunity, fearing she’ll miss a moment of joy, while April opens up about finding comfort—and sometimes avoidance—in staying home and protecting her energy. Together, they unpack how both extremes can lead to burnout, disconnection, or overwhelm, and how finding the middle ground is what truly supports emotional safety.

With grounding exercises like the Wayne Cook regulation technique, reflections on childhood experiences, and compassionate insight into overstimulation vs. loneliness, this episode helps listeners discover their own balance between saying yes and honoring no.

And of course… it ends with a joke you won’t want to miss. 🍅😂