How is it possible that we've put men on the moon, mapped the human genome, and developed artificial intelligence, yet some men still don't understand where women pee from?

This week on The Women Are Plotting, Etienne, Heidi, and Jane tackle the astonishing—and sometimes downright hilarious—misconceptions men have about women's bodies. And trust us, some of these beliefs will leave you wondering whether anyone was paying attention in sex ed.

From men who think women can hold in their periods like pee, to those who believe tampon sizes correspond to vagina sizes, the ladies uncover some truly spectacular examples of anatomical ignorance. Apparently, some men even think women's breasts are permanently stocked with milk, ready to dispense on demand!

Jane shares the unforgettable story of how her future husband, after a night of drinking in New York City, decided to conduct his own anatomical research while she peed under a streetlight at 3 a.m. Meanwhile, Etienne draws on her nursing experience to explain just how tricky female anatomy can be—even for medical professionals.

But the conversation goes much deeper than clueless men and questionable sex education.

The women explore why female bodies have historically been overlooked in medical research, how little many of us learned about our own sexual anatomy, and why ignorance about women's reproductive health becomes especially dangerous when it influences medical treatment and legislation.

They also get candid about menopause, hormone replacement therapy, urinary health, the clitoris, orgasms, and why women shouldn't have to accept uncomfortable symptoms as an inevitable part of getting older.

Equal parts outrageous, educational, and unapologetically filthy, this episode is a hilarious reminder that women's bodies aren't some unsolvable mystery—we just need to start talking about them.

Because if you don't know the difference between a vagina and a urethra, maybe it's time to stop pretending you're an expert on women's bodies.

Join Etienne, Heidi, and Jane for another unfiltered conversation about sex, science, aging, and the spectacular things people still don't know about half the human population.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Can the stars really tell us who we are, who we should date, and whether a relationship is destined to succeed—or is astrology just a bunch of cosmic bullshit?

This week on The Women Are Plotting, Etienne, Heidi, and Jane dive into the fascinating world of astrology, exploring everything from zodiac signs and birth charts to planetary influences, romantic compatibility, and the possibility that the universe might actually be trying to tell us something.

Etienne kicks things off with a surprising discovery: depending on which astrological system you follow, you might not even be the zodiac sign you've believed you were your entire life. Heidi explains how astrology can serve as a tool for self-reflection, while Jane shares how a high school boyfriend first challenged her skepticism about whether the stars could influence our lives.

But things get particularly interesting when the conversation turns to dating.

Jane reveals how she secretly used detailed birth charts to evaluate potential boyfriends—including the man she's now been with for 26 years. Apparently, knowing a man's birth date, birthplace, and exact time of birth can be pretty valuable information. Especially when his chart suggests a combination of occasional temper tantrums, fierce loyalty, and mind-blowing sex.

Meanwhile, Etienne explores her own astrological compatibility, discovers which zodiac signs might make the best romantic partners, and considers whether she should start asking men on dating apps for their birth certificates. The women even stumble upon astrology-based dating apps and contemplate putting them to the test.

Along the way, they discuss Mercury retrograde, sun signs versus moon and rising signs, the ancient history of astrology, and whether birth charts can help identify relationship patterns before you waste years on the wrong person.

Funny, candid, occasionally filthy, and surprisingly thought-provoking, this episode asks one big question:

Is your love life written in the stars—or are we just looking for a better way to weed out the assholes?

Join Etienne, Heidi, and Jane as they explore whether astrology is ancient wisdom, a useful tool for self-discovery, or simply a really entertaining way to explain why your ex was such a disaster.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Remember when you could make a complete ass of yourself without someone recording it and posting it on the internet?

Welcome to the Gen X experience.

This week on The Women Are Plotting, Etienne, Heidi, and Jane explore what it means to be the generation that grew up analog and somehow ended up living in an entirely digital world.

From rotary phones, cassette tapes, Walkmans, and film cameras to smartphones, dating apps, virtual reality, and artificial intelligence, Gen X has experienced an extraordinary technological transformation. But just because we've embraced the digital revolution doesn't mean we have to like everything about it.

The women reminisce about the freedom of growing up without social media, when your most embarrassing moments weren't permanently documented and you had to wait to develop your photographs to find out whether you actually captured anything worth keeping.

Jane shares how testing a virtual tour at work left her curled up in a ball under her desk, while Etienne reveals the dating-app encounter that had a younger man asking her to fulfill his granny fantasy. And Heidi raises the question of whether all this technological convenience is worth the privacy we've surrendered along the way.

The conversation also takes on AI, surveillance, subscription culture, increasingly complicated appliances, and the infuriating experience of trying to reach an actual human being in customer service.

Through it all, one thing becomes clear: Gen X knows how to navigate the digital world, but we still remember when you could fix your own appliances, leave the house without being tracked, and make questionable decisions without leaving a permanent digital footprint.

We may have adapted to the future, but that doesn't mean we've forgotten the past—or that we're particularly happy about all these fucking subscriptions.

Join us for a hilarious, nostalgic, and occasionally exasperated look at life as the generation caught between two very different worlds.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

Does it count as cheating if you never actually touch the other person?

This week on The Women Are Plotting, Etienne, Heidi, and Jane dive into the increasingly complicated world of digital infidelity—and quickly discover that cheating in 2026 looks a whole lot different than it did when they were young.

From flirty emails and AOL chat rooms to sexting, secret DMs, dating apps, porn, Fitbit affairs, and even AI boyfriends and girlfriends, the women debate where harmless fantasy ends and betrayal begins.

And this one gets personal.

Etienne confesses that she was an early adopter of digital infidelity back in the 1990s, when an office email flirtation turned into a very real—and spectacularly regrettable—encounter. Jane reveals her own experience sexting strangers in AOL chat rooms during a rough patch in a long-term relationship. And then there's the woman who used Fitbit to flirt with strangers…until her suspicious husband created a fake account and unknowingly got his own wife to flirt with him.

But things get even stranger when the conversation turns to AI. If you're married but getting emotional support, romantic validation, or sexual gratification from an AI companion, are you cheating—even though the “other person” isn't a person at all?

Funny, candid, occasionally filthy, and surprisingly thought-provoking, this episode asks a very modern relationship question: If you'd have to hide it from your partner, does that make it cheating?

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What if the magic we’re looking for is already happening all around us?

This week on The Women Are Plotting, Etienne, Heidi, and Jane explore how to find whimsy, joy, intuition, and those strange little moments that make you wonder if the universe might be trying to tell you something.

Jane dives into the growing embrace of whimsy as a form of rebellion against doomscrolling, conformity, and an increasingly harsh world. Heidi shares why she believes in following the breadcrumbs—and how an annoying delay might sometimes turn out to be exactly what you needed.

Then things get seriously weird.

Jane recounts a vivid dream about dying in a car accident—only to find herself months later on the same road, hearing the same Billy Joel song from her dream just before a semi runs a red light. Etienne talks about meditation, manifestation, energy, and what happened when she started asking the universe for exactly what she wanted. And Jane shares the moving story of her daughter asking a late childhood friend to send her a deer as a sign…and what happened next.

From premonitions and synchronicities to four-leaf clovers, manifestation, mysterious delays, and simply stopping to watch a bee disappear into a flower, the women ask: What happens when we stop dismissing the weird stuff and start paying attention?

Maybe finding magic doesn’t require believing in the impossible.

Maybe it just requires looking for it.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

How much of yourself have you changed, hidden, or made smaller just to keep other people comfortable?

In this deeply personal—and frequently hilarious—episode of The Women Are Plotting, Etienne Rose Olivier, Heidi Willis, and Jane Gari explore what it really means to live authentically, especially as Gen X women who grew up learning to be agreeable, fit in, and care far too much about what other people thought.

The conversation begins with everything from targeted ads pushing the so-called “cool midlife fashion uniform” to the complicated meaning behind Shakespeare's famous “to thine own self be true.” But it quickly gets much deeper.

Jane reflects on slowly losing parts of herself in a seven-year relationship and eventually realizing that the person she had become no longer wanted the same life. Etienne opens up about how gradually silencing herself in a relationship left her feeling trapped in her own home and disconnected from who she really was. Heidi discusses neurodivergent masking, making yourself smaller for others, and the freedom that comes when you finally stop trying to be the person everyone else expects.

The women also explore authenticity at work, listening when your body tells you something is wrong, walking away from situations that no longer align with your values, finding “your people,” and why being yourself doesn't mean using authenticity as an excuse to be an asshole.

And because this is The Women Are Plotting, a thoughtful discussion about living your truth eventually leads to the ultimate test of intimacy: whether you're comfortable enough to fart in front of the person you love.

At midlife, maybe authenticity isn't about discovering one permanent “true self.” Maybe it's about giving yourself permission to keep changing—and refusing to abandon yourself along the way.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What are you addicted to—and how do you know when something you enjoy has crossed the line into something that's controlling your life?

In this unusually raw and personal episode of The Women Are Plotting, Etienne Rose Olivier, Heidi Willis, and Jane Gari take on addiction in all its forms, from cocaine and alcoholism to sex, shopping, relationships, compulsive behaviors, and the endless dopamine machine of social media.

Etienne shares the disturbing experience of discovering that a man she was sleeping with was addicted to crack—and watching as his choices contributed to the destruction of his career while he continued using. Heidi opens up about growing up with a mother whose lifelong alcoholism ultimately became fatal, the family's attempts to intervene, and the heartbreaking experience of briefly getting her mother back during a period of sobriety.

Etienne also gets candid about her own history with alcohol, including blackouts, hallucinations, damaged relationships, and the surprising sense of freedom she experienced after finally quitting.

But addiction isn't always about drugs or alcohol. The conversation expands into genetics, brain chemistry, dopamine, OCD, ADHD, gambling, shopping, sex, exercise, unhealthy relationships, and social media. Can we become addicted to a person? Is compulsively checking something fundamentally different from chasing a chemical high? And when does an innocent habit become a problem?

Ultimately, the women arrive at a simple question worth asking ourselves: Is something helping you live the life you want—or has it started getting in the way?

From crack cocaine and family trauma to peppermint oil, Ryan Gosling videos, and the irresistible pull of the algorithm, this episode explores why humans keep reaching for things that make us feel better—and what can happen when the thing that soothes us becomes the thing we can't stop.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.

What happens when sex stops being private—and somebody else accidentally becomes part of the experience?

In this wildly candid episode of The Women Are Plotting, Etienne Rose Olivier, Heidi Willis, and Jane Gari dive into what they jokingly call “secondhand sex”: walking in on people, overhearing them, getting caught, or realizing after the fact that someone else had a front-row seat.

The conversation begins with childhood memories of walking in on parents having sex and the surprisingly different ways families handle those awkward moments. Jane shares both a loving childhood memory of accidentally interrupting her parents and a much more mortifying college-age encounter that resulted in what she calls the most “joyless” slice of New York pizza of her life.

From there, the stories only get more outrageous. Jane recounts the karmic payback of having her own toddler overhear her and Brendon, leading to a hilariously disastrous attempt to explain that Mommy and Daddy were “playing a game.” Etienne shares stories involving an unwanted voyeur, a boyfriend who kept having sex while her future stepbrother sat on the bed talking to them, and the lengths she went to avoid hearing her mother masturbate.

The women also get into public sex, celebrity scandals, being caught outdoors, sex in swimming pools, and the unforgettable couple Jane spotted having sex against a tree on a family hike while desperately pretending they were simply very interested in the bark.

Funny, explicit, and full of stories that are impossible to unhear, this episode is a celebration of embarrassment, boundaries, consent, and the very human reality that sometimes your private moment is not nearly as private as you thought.

Send us Fan Mail

Email us at info@thewomenareplotting.com, and find us on all the socials. Be safe and be excellent to each other.