Losing someone you love can make you wonder if you're grieving "the right way." You may have heard about the five stages of grief and expected to move neatly from one stage to the next.

But that's not how grief works.

In this chat, we explain why the stages of grief are not a roadmap or a checklist. You may experience some of the stages, none of them, or revisit the same emotions over and over again. Grief is deeply personal, and there is no single "correct" path through it.

If you've ever thought, "I was doing better... why am I falling apart again?" or "Shouldn't I be in a different stage by now?" this conversation is for you.

You'll learn:

Why grief isn't linear
Why emotions come and go unexpectedly
Why you may never experience every stage
How understanding this can reduce fear, guilt, and self-judgment
How to trust your own unique grief journey

Remember: you're not failing at grief. You're experiencing one of the most human responses to profound loss.

If this video helped you feel a little less alone, subscribe for more compassionate conversations about navigating the early days and months of grief.

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

Grief is part of your story. But not the whole story.

There are parts of grief that almost everyone experiences—but very few people ever talk about.

What if, after your loved one died, you felt relief?

What if you found yourself feeling hurt, frustrated, or even resentful toward the people around you?

These emotions can be deeply unsettling, leaving many grieving people wondering, "What's wrong with me?" The truth is, these reactions are far more common than most of us realize. Yet because they're uncomfortable to admit, many people carry them silently, believing they're somehow grieving the "wrong" way.

In this episode, we have an honest conversation about the hidden emotions of grief—especially the ones that can bring shame or self-judgment. We explore why feelings like relief, resentment, disappointment, or frustration can naturally arise after a profound loss and why experiencing them doesn't diminish your love for the person who died.

In this conversation, we'll discuss:

• Why relief can be a normal part of grief after a long illness or caregiving journey
• The surprising reasons you may feel hurt, frustrated, or resentful after a loss
• Why these emotions don't make you a bad person—they make you human
• How unspoken feelings can keep us feeling isolated and ashamed
• The healing power of talking honestly about the parts of grief that most people hide

One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves is permission to tell the truth about our grief—even when that truth feels messy or confusing.

Our hope is that this conversation helps you replace self-judgment with self-compassion and reminds you that you're not alone. Because when we begin talking openly about the parts of grief that no one seems to discuss, healing becomes a little less lonely.

If this conversation resonates with you, we'd love to hear from you in the comments. Your honesty may be exactly what someone else needs to feel seen.

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

Grief is part of your story. But not the whole story.

After the death of a loved one, many people are surprised by how difficult everyday life becomes.

You may find yourself forgetting appointments, struggling to focus, rereading the same page over and over, losing track of conversations, or feeling mentally exhausted by tasks that once felt simple. Some people begin to wonder if something is wrong with them.

The truth is that grief affects far more than our emotions.

Grief can impact attention, memory, concentration, decision-making, motivation, and even our ability to complete everyday tasks. What many people describe as "grief brain" is a common response to profound loss.

In this conversation, we explore:

• Why grief can make it difficult to focus
• The connection between grief, stress, and cognitive function
• Why memory problems are common after loss
• The emotional impact of no longer functioning the way you once did
• How to practice self-compassion during periods of mental fog

If you've ever found yourself wondering why you can't think, remember, organize, or function the way you used to before your loss, you're not alone.

Your brain isn't failing.

Your heart is carrying something incredibly heavy.

And understanding that can be an important step toward healing. ❤️

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

Grief is part of your story. But not the whole story.

For nearly 30 years, I carried a painful belief about the death of my daughter.

While everyone around me seemed to understand that she was dying, I always felt I was the only one who thought maybe she wouldn't. I felt dumb and wondered how I could have been the only person who didn't see what was happening. At times, I felt angry and betrayed. I even questioned my faith and wondered whether my hope had somehow been misplaced.

Over the years, I told myself a story about what that meant.

Then recently, I encountered research that offered an entirely different perspective.

The research suggested that in moments of extreme fear and uncertainty, the presence of even one person who genuinely believes everything will be okay can have a profound impact on everyone around them. That person's hope can help calm fear, create emotional safety, and provide strength when others are struggling.

As I reflected on that idea, something shifted.

For the first time, I stopped seeing myself as the person who "didn't get it" and began seeing myself as the person who carried hope when hope was desperately needed.

Alexis never had to look into my eyes to see despair. She only saw love and a belief in the possibility of miracles.

My new perspective didn't change what happened. It didn't erase the loss. It didn't remove the pain of losing my daughter.

But it changed the meaning I had attached to that chapter of my life for nearly three decades.

In this conversation, we explore:

• How the stories we tell ourselves can shape our healing
• Why grief sometimes asks us to revisit old beliefs
• The role of hope during life's most difficult moments
• How perspective shifts can create unexpected healing
• Finding compassion for earlier versions of ourselves
• Why meaning-making remains an important part of grief integration

If you've ever carried guilt, regret, embarrassment, or self-judgment about something that happened during a difficult time, this conversation may offer a new way of looking at your own story.

Sometimes healing doesn't come from finding new answers.

Sometimes it comes from asking a different question.

And sometimes, years later, we discover that what we once saw as a weakness may have actually been a gift.

❤️

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

You're invited to join a complimentary MasterClass called "The First Days and Months After Loss" on Thursday July 23rd @ 1pm EST.

Save Your Seat by Registering Here:
https://www.eventbrite.ca/e/1992780759897?aff=oddtdtcreator

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

Grief is part of your story. But not the whole story.

The anniversary of a loved one's death can bring a wide range of emotions—sadness, gratitude, love, anxiety, reflection, or even unexpected peace. There is no right way to experience these milestone days, and what feels meaningful can change from year to year.

In this conversation, Carol reflects on the eighth anniversary of her husband's death and shares some of the ways she has learned to approach this significant day. We explore different ways to honor and remember someone we love, the importance of staying open to whatever emotions arise, and why planning for self-care can make a meaningful difference.

In this video, we discuss:

• Different ways to honor and remember a loved one on their anniversary
• Why there is no "right" way to spend the day
• The importance of reflection and self-compassion
• How anniversaries can change over time
• Creating space for both remembrance and self-care

Whether the anniversary is approaching for the first time or the twentieth, we hope this conversation offers comfort, perspective, and permission to honor your grief in whatever way feels right for you.

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

Grief is part of your story. But not the whole story.

One of the most disorienting parts of grief is realizing that the world keeps moving… even when your own world has completely changed.

People go back to work.
Conversations continue.
Events happen.
Ordinary life carries on.

And meanwhile, you may still be trying to understand how someone so important can suddenly be gone.

In this conversation, we explore the loneliness, shock, and emotional disconnect that can arise when life keeps moving after loss — and why this experience is such a deeply human part of grief.

Because sometimes the pain isn’t only the loss itself…
it’s the feeling that the world no longer reflects the magnitude of what happened to you.

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.

Grief is part of your story. But not the whole story.

Many people are surprised — and sometimes frightened — when grief suddenly returns years after a loss.

A wedding.
A song.
A milestone.
A quiet moment.
And suddenly, the sadness feels present all over again.

In this conversation, we explore why grief can resurface long after we think we’ve “moved on,” how unresolved emotions and meaningful life events can reopen grief, and why these moments do not mean you are healing incorrectly.

Because grief is not linear.
It doesn’t follow a schedule.
And feeling grief again years later does not mean you are back at the beginning.

Often, it simply means love, memory, and loss are still woven into your life in new ways.

👉 Follow for tools to navigate grief and difficult emotions and visit www.thegriefgurus.com for practical conversations about grief, coping, and living after loss.

#TheGriefGurus #CarolBanens #LisaMcFarland #healing

Show Notes + Resources:

Grief Gurus Healing Community: www.thegriefgurus.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GriefGurus

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/thegriefgurus

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/griefgurus/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/GriefGurus/

Lisa McFarland: https://lisamcfarland.com/

Carol Banens: https://carolbanens.com/

Information on books written and published by Lisa and Carol can be found on their individual websites, social media profiles and Amazon.