As a recovering superstitious bitch myself, I get it — I’ve carried crystals in my bra, wore the "lucky" jersey to help my team win, and avoided the number 13 like it personally wronged me. But at some point, you have to ask: is all this shit helping me… or just keeping me stuck?

We’re diving into how superstition feels like safety but often turns into self-sabotage. I'll share my own messy-ass journey from magical thinking to actual empowerment — and why taking responsibility for your life is scarier (and sexier) than any Friday the 13th curse.

This episode is about breaking the spell — because superstition gave me rules, but healing gave me freedom

🚨 Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of abuse—emotional, physical, sexual, verbal, emotional, and psychological. It’s raw, real, and potentially triggering. Please take care while listening.

Abuse isn’t always about bruises or broken bones. Sometimes it’s the mindfuck of gaslighting, the sting of verbal attacks, or the silent soul-crushing that happens behind closed doors. In this no-holds-barred episode, I break down the different types of abuse that fuck with your head, your heart, and your sense of self.

We’re talking emotional manipulation, psychological mind games, coercive control, and all the shit that’s often dismissed or hidden under the rug. I’m bringing in stories from my clinical work, my own damn life, and the brutal truths people are too scared to say out loud.

If you’ve ever wondered “Was that really abuse?”—this episode is for you. You're not crazy. You’re not alone. And you sure as hell don’t have to stay stuck.

Let’s get real—your role in the family wasn’t just about when you were born. It was shaped by culture, expectations, survival, and the unspoken rules passed down through generations. Were you the “second parent” oldest? The baby who never got taken seriously? The quiet middle trying to keep the peace? Or the only child who had to carry it all?

And how did your culture shape those roles? In many families—especially immigrant, Latinx, Black, Asian, or collectivist cultures—birth order isn’t just a dynamic, it’s a duty. Expectations around gender, respect, sacrifice, and success hit differently depending on where you come from and what your family believed made you “a good son” or “a strong daughter.”

In this episode, we dig into how birth order and culture collide to shape who you had to be—and how that’s still impacting you now. We’ll talk about unspoken family rules, emotional roles we never signed up for, and how these old patterns still show up in your adult life—especially when you’re triggered, anxious, or feeling stuck.

Grief doesn’t knock. It kicks the fucking door in—and suddenly, your world’s upside down. Grief isn’t just about losing someone—it’s about losing something: a relationship, a version of yourself, the life you thought you’d have. In this raw and honest episode, I dive into the many faces of grief—death, divorce, identity, change—and how it sneaks up on us, stays longer than we want, and teaches us things we didn’t know we needed to learn.

We’ll talk about how grief can show up as anger, numbness, guilt, or even relief—and why all of it is valid. I’ll share personal stories, clinical insights, and some unfiltered truth about navigating loss without bypassing your feelings or sugarcoating the process.

Whether you’re grieving a person, a relationship, or a part of yourself, this episode is for you.

Trigger Warning: This episode includes mentions of death, depression, and emotional pain.

Do you find yourself pulling away when things get too real—even from people you care about? That’s emotional distancing, and it’s more common than you think. In this episode, we’re digging into what emotional distancing really is, why it happens (spoiler: it’s often a trauma response), and how it shows up in your relationships. Whether you’re ghosting people you love, numbing out, or building walls instead of boundaries, we’re going to unpack the reasons behind it and how to slowly, safely reconnect. Vulnerability is scary—but you don’t have to armor up forever. Let’s get into it.

In this episode of Keeping It Real with Zulma: The Swearing Therapist, we're diving deep into the sneaky little mind traps known as cognitive distortions—those automatic, often unconscious thoughts that twist reality and fuel anxiety, depression, and self-doubt.

From all-or-nothing thinking to catastrophizing and emotional reasoning, I'll break down the most common distortions and how they fuck with your mental health. Expect real talk, practical tips, and of course, some well-placed swearing to keep it authentic. If you’ve ever caught yourself spiraling in negative thoughts and wondered, “Why the fuck do I do this?”, this one’s for you.

Negative thoughts are loud — but your blessings are louder, if you let them be. In this episode, we’re getting real about how focusing on what’s right in your life can completely shift your mental game. I’m breaking down simple, no-fluff strategies to tune out the toxic noise in your head and anchor yourself in gratitude. You’ve survived too much and come too far to let negativity win. Let’s flip the script — it’s time to count your blessings like your life depends on it… because sometimes, it does.

Perfectionism might sound noble, but let’s be real—it’s often just fear dressed up in a fancy outfit. In this episode, we’re calling it out. If you’ve ever delayed starting something because you were not “ready” or torn yourself apart over not getting it “just right,” this one's for you.

I’m diving into the messy truth about perfectionism, how it keeps us stuck, and why DONE is way the hell better than perfect. Let’s talk about letting go of unrealistic expectations, showing up as we are, and giving ourselves permission to be human. Because spoiler alert: progress beats perfection every fucking time.