UC Santa Barbara head swim coach Jax Rosen joins Jill for the latest episode of What She Taught Me, our series of honest conversations about how our mothers shaped us.

Jax grew up in San Francisco as a synchronized swimmer. She walked onto her college swim team, got six months to prove herself, earned a scholarship, and fell in love with a sport where "the time is yours." That love took her from coaching high school to Division I programs across the country, and now into her sixth year leading the UCSB men's and women's teams.

Jax talks about: a mom who never stayed in bed, and what that taught her about showing up; learning to do her own laundry, and how independence was her mom's way of asking for help; growing up surrounded by family friends who became aunts, uncles and cousins; why talking to strangers became her edge as a recruiter; what her mom carried quietly to keep the family feeling safe; choosing a partner who understands her feelings instead of dismissing them; and what she unlearned: saying out loud what she wants and needs.

If your mother was your champion, your challenger, or somewhere in between, this one will stay with you.

More about Jax:

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/swimfish415

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• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Welcome to What She Taught Me

01:09 From synchro to swimming: how Jax built her coaching career

02:38 "You got to go": a mom who always showed up

04:00 Kindness to strangers and an early sense of perspective

05:09 Pink laundry and learning independence

06:44 The village: family friends who became family

07:07 Where Jax sees her mom in herself (yes, including retelling stories)

08:25 What her mom carried that no one acknowledged

10:15 Siblings, inside jokes and "whatever the swimmer wants"

11:43 What Jax chose to do differently in love and marriage

14:55 What she unlearned: saying what you want

15:57 Closing

Suzanne Scheer is back on Go Long, this time to talk about her mom.

Suzanne was an only child who became a caregiver at 33. Her parents passed five weeks apart. Through all of it, she leaned on the one lesson her mother made a priority: you can cope with anything. You don't have a choice. You keep going.

We talk about the mother who never learned to drive and filled her days with needlepoint, sewing, and cooking. The woman who lost her own mother young, stepped in to raise her siblings, and kept her mother's recipes alive so well that her brothers and sisters would tear up at the smell. And the mom who always paid the bills, which shaped Suzanne's belief that no woman should be in the dark about her own finances.

In this episode: why coping skills may be the most important thing we pass on to our kids; the patience Suzanne learned from a mom who couldn't just hop in the car; what her mother carried that nobody acknowledged; why scent hits so hard (and an unexpected Tampa airport flashback); how caregiving support has changed — geriatric care managers, daily money managers, dementia coaches, and friends who check in; the 63 million unpaid caregivers who report feeling alone; why showing up for someone in a hard moment matters more than you think; what Suzanne is unlearning: putting everyone else first; and how seeing women blindsided by finances in family law drove her career pivot to long-term care planning.

Favorite moment: Suzanne's mom's needlepoint sign. "For sale. One husband. Cheap." Dollar sign included.

More about Suzanne:

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/suzannescheer/

• Website — https://www.sgsinsurance.net/

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/suzannescheer_jd_cltc/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61550129835644

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:05 Navigating Healthcare and Maternal Influence

02:38 The Impact of Caregiving on Career Choices

05:00 Lessons in Coping and Resilience

08:05 The Importance of Asking for Help

10:21 The Role of Community and Support

12:44 The Power of Small Acts of Kindness

15:05 Parenting and Passing Down Values

15:11 The Art of Needlepoint and Family Humor

17:29 Financial Independence and Empowerment

Jillian Bernstein lost her mom, Fern, 18 years ago, when Jillian was 27 and in her first HR job. How her employer treated her during that time — very little bereavement leave, pressure to come back fast — is part of why she later founded the Wellness Extension, an HR boutique consulting firm helping small businesses build connection, community, and well-being into how they treat their people.

In this episode of What She Taught Me, Jill and Jillian talk about the quiet generosity Fern practiced without anyone knowing, and the handwritten thank you notes the family found after she passed; the charity the family started in her name to support kids in local schools; why Fern's early morning workouts and "little pink weights" taught Jillian to prioritize her own health, physical and mental; the invisible load Fern carried as the family's organizer and "CFO" (and why the shoebox filing system did not survive); unlearning the reflex to say "I'm sorry"; the trade-offs Jillian chose differently: building her own business, blocking her calendar for her kids' games, and learning to delegate; why asking for help is an act of vulnerability, not weakness; and the family credo: Don't sweat the small stuff... and it's all small stuff.

More about Jillian:

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillianbernstein/

• Website — https://www.wellness-extension.com/

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/wellness_extension/

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Navigating Grief and Influence

02:30 Quiet Generosity and Life Lessons

06:53 Balancing Self-Care and Family

10:39 Unlearning and Personal Growth

15:04 Asking for Help and Vulnerability

18:46 Living by Family Credos

Carin Parcel's mom was never a wallflower. A Brooklyn-born force who moved her family from Southern California to Omaha, she showed up as herself everywhere she went — and that lesson stuck.

On this episode of What She Taught Me, Jill sits down with Carin, a former intellectual property attorney turned jewelry designer and founder of Carin Susann Designs. They talk about growing up with a mom who modeled being unapologetic, unlearning the roles she saw at home, and walking away from a big law firm salary to build a career at the crossroads of science and art. In this episode: growing up with a mom who was always the authority in the room; how family roles follow you, and what it took to step outside them; starting therapy at 23, long before it was "fashionable"; what she saw at home vs. what she was told she could become; what her mom carried that no one acknowledged; leaving law for a retail jewelry job (and a huge pay cut) to follow her love of gemology; why COVID gave her the space to finally launch her business; the real tradeoffs of running a business while raising three kids; the Wendy's drive-thru story her daughter never forgot; how siblings can grow up with completely different childhoods; and finding ways to help aging parents when you're not the one nearby.

More about Carin:

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/carin-riekes-parcel-49597a20/

• Website — https://carinsusann.com/

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/carinsusanndesigns/

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Introduction to Influences

01:51 Career Shifts and Maternal Influence

04:59 Finding Independence and Voice

07:34 Unlearning Traditional Roles

11:04 Carrying Unacknowledged Burdens

12:19 Asking for Help and Generational Patterns

14:15 Navigating Parenting Expectations

14:46 Career Transitions and Personal Growth

16:20 The Leap from Law to Jewelry

17:20 Balancing Motherhood and Entrepreneurship

19:36 Trade-offs in Daily Life

21:13 Crazy Mom Moments and Lessons Learned

28:10 Family Dynamics and Support

28:46 Creative Problem Solving

31:47 Reflections on Childhood and Growth

35:03 Reflections on Life Changes

37:06 Engagement Stories and Personal Connections

In this episode of What She Taught Me by Go Long — the series' first mother-daughter conversation — Jill Consor Beck talks to Jenna Shaps, a recent Indiana University advertising grad about to move to New York City, and her mom Shane Shaps, who owns a social media engagement agency in Louisville. Shane traces her own boundary-setting straight back to watching her mother push herself into exhaustion and depression when Shane was twelve: "it's okay to say no, it's okay to have boundaries." Jenna calls her mom a "girl boss" who can "get shit done" for the whole family and still make time for herself. Shane says her own mother never really yelled at her — and then admits the line she swore she'd never say to her own kids slipped out anyway: "Can you just act like an adult for one?"

More about Shane and Jenna:

• Jenna's LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/jenna-shaps-59b1a9234/

• Shane's LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/shane-shaps/

• Website — https://bigvoicesocial.com/

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/big.voice.social

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/bigvoicesocial/

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Introduction to the series' first mother-daughter conversation: Jenna and Shane Shaps

01:32 Shane on her mother's perfectionism, burnout, and learning to set boundaries

03:48 Sacrifices Shane made for Jenna and what Jenna would do differently as a parent

06:02 Growing up in a small Jewish community in Louisville and choosing colleges for that

07:58 Did Shane's mother ever learn to ask for help after burning out

10:21 The trade-offs women make, and Jenna's move to New York as her own

12:22 Asking friends for help: three generations, three different patterns

14:29 The line Shane swore she'd never say to her kids — and said anyway

18:15 Closing thoughts and where to find Jenna and Shane

In this episode of What She Taught Me by Go Long, Jill Consor Beck talks to Shujaat Ahmad, a founder focused on helping people who are being left behind by AI. Shujaat's mother is a contradiction — relentless in service to others, but rigid and opinionated about fairness and gender roles — and by his own account, that paradox is what made him who he is: someone built for service, and someone now actively pushing back against the same rigidity as him and his wife raise their daughters. As the youngest child in the house, his job every night during Ramadan was to carry a tray of his mother's celebratory dinner to a neighbor, then a second tray to a guard or stranger on the street who had nothing to eat that day. Now, in his mid-40s, he's stopped staying quiet — telling Jill flat out, "we're going to not even sugar coat this... even if that means that there's a rift in the family because of it."

More about Shujaat:

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/shujaatahmad/

• Website — https://www.skool.com/chaiwithai/about

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Introduction to Shujaat and Growing Up as a "Professional Immigrant"

02:21 His Mother as a Paradox of Service and Rigid Fairness

06:35 Three Things That Shaped Him: Service, Ramadan Meals, and What He's Unlearning

11:39 Raising Daughters Inside a Multigenerational Household

14:14 Backchanneling with His Daughters and Drawing the Line

In this episode of What She Taught Me by Go Long, Jill Consor Beck talks to Rebekah Bastian, CMO at mpathic and author of Blaze Your Own Trail: An Interactive Guide to Navigating Life with Confidence, Solidarity, and Compassion, who traces her creativity and "delusional optimism" straight back to her free-spirited, artist mother. Rebekah still brings that creative streak into her workday — she admits to "literally being sitting here in a meeting, knitting a leg warmer right now." She's trying to unlearn the same over-involvement she inherited from her mom: "I should delegate more. I should step back more." She was, by her own account, "an absolute train wreck of a teenager" — and still hasn't found a clean answer for what her parents could have done differently.

Resources mentioned:

• Blaze Your Own Trail — https://www.amazon.com/Blaze-Your-Own-Trail-Interactive-ebook/dp/B07Y422NWF

More about Rebekah:

• Website — https://rebekahbastian.com/

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/rebekahbastian/

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Introduction to Rebekah and Being Purpose-Driven in Her Current Role

01:33 Following in Her Mom's Footsteps as an Artist

03:14 What Went Unacknowledged: A Family of Worriers

05:14 How She Uses Creativity to Bridge Both Personal and Professional Lives

07:00 Time-Boxing Work and Startup Motherhood

09:04 How She Thinks About Her Train Wreck Years As She Parents Her Kids

10:38 The Importance of Vulnerability, Crying, and Asking For Help

12:08 Closing Thoughts and Family Time at the Mariners Game

In this episode of What She Taught Me by Go Long, Jill Consor Beck talks to Shelby Tutty, a certified perimenopause coach and author of two Substacks — The Periprofessional and Women's Health 365. Shelby says the caution her mother carried from childhood trauma — a near-drowning, a serious car accident, a miscarriage — got imprinted onto her, and it shaped her into the kind of parent who can't just relax at the playground. She still remembers her mother throwing her arm out to protect the kids in the front seat every time she had to stop short, and now catches herself repeating her mother's own warnings to her own kids, like "if it's brown and round, step around." She's still questioning whether she took it too far: "I wonder, did I go too far? Did I really imprint upon them?"

Resources mentioned:

• Women's Health 365 (Substack) — https://womenshealth365.substack.com/

• The Periprofessional (Substack) — https://theperiprofessional.substack.com/

More about Shelby:

• Website — https://www.theperiprofessional.com/

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/theperiprofessional/

• Services — https://theperiprofessional.substack.com/p/paid-services

More about Jill & Go Long:

• Sign-up for Go Long's newsletter — https://golong.substack.com/subscribe

• Learn more about Go Long — https://www.golong.me/how-it-works

• Instagram — https://www.instagram.com/justgolong/

• Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/justgolong

• LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/company/go-long/

Jump to:

00:00 Introduction to the series and guest Shelby Tutty

02:42 When her mother said not to be afraid of men

04:41 Her mother's journey through independence and education in the 60s

08:04 Unseen burdens: trauma and resilience in her mother's life

11:12 Learning to ask for help: a personal transformation

14:36 Parenting imprints from her mother and if it went too far

16:30 Advice to her younger self and understanding her mother better after her passing

17:43 The devastation of losing everything of her mother's in a house fire