As we said last time, Jesus was not afraid to tackle the tough subjects of the day in His Sermon on the Mount. After a confronting few minutes, during which he challenged his hearers to flee the perils of sexual temptation, the awkwardness for some is not yet over. Next Jesus goes full throttle against divorce.

Let’s start here, though, with the reminder that we live in an imperfect world and that God is a God of forgiveness, love, and grace. He mends broken hearts and helps us in our pain, giving wisdom in difficult decisions. Having said that, for the purposes of this devotion, the Scriptures are clear that the Lord created marriage, in Genesis chapter 2 v 22 – 24, and that He hates divorce (Mal 2: 16 NASB).

In the next part of His sermon, Jesus said, 31 “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” Matthew 5:31-32

In Jesus’ day there were two schools of thought about divorce. Rabbi Shammai taught that divorce can only be permitted for very serious offenses. Rabbi Hillel taught that a man can divorce his wife for any reason, however ridiculous. If she burnt a meal – she’s out! If the husband prefers the looks of another woman, he can divorce his wife and marry the other!

Jesus was probably referring to the second school of thought here in the Sermon on the Mount. Notice that He is talking to men, and He emphasises how the wife becomes the victim. This is important. Jesus is challenging every man to think about what is best for his wife. To not just think about himself.

Whenever there is a relationship breakdown, whether it is just a petty argument or something as serious as seeking a divorce, the hardest thing to do is to start thinking about what is best for the other person. Perhaps there would be fewer divorces in the world if people gave the highest priority to what is best for the person they have married.

Staying with the focus on men, Paul taught that husbands must love their wives as Christ has loved the church in Ephesian 5: 25. There is no condition here. It is not ‘love their wives’, if the wives do their part. It is ‘love their wives as Christ loved the church’. Full Stop!

I once heard somebody say that marriage is not 50-50; it is 100-100. In other words, we give to our partner without conditions attached. In Jesus’s comments about divorce in the Sermon on the Mount it is easy to focus on the parts that talk about adultery and whether there are circumstances that permit divorce. I have a feeling Jesus also wants us to try looking away from self for a moment and consider what is best for the one I married.

Jesus was not afraid to tackle the tough subjects in His Sermon on the Mount. After challenging his listeners to consider the use of their words, particularly when words might hurt or offend others, he moves to their thoughts, specifically in the area of sexual attraction.

27 “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. 30 And if your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to go into hell. Matthew 5:27-30

Sexual attraction towards another is one of the most powerful forces that God has created for good (inside marriage), but it is also the most manipulated by our enemy, the devil, for evil.

Everybody knows that committing adultery is morally wrong and destructive, but Jesus takes the Old Testament command a step further. He tells us that even if we look at another person (which includes pornography) and allow our imagination to desire adultery, that is no different. It is still morally wrong and destructive.

Jesus died on the cross to take the penalty for our sins, providing a way that we might receive forgiveness and freedom. Then He gives us His Spirit to empower us towards living a new and clean life. But the emphasis here in the sermon is on how serious adultery is, even if it is imagined adultery. It is not something to gloss over or take lightly.

Jesus’ comments about cutting off parts of the body are obviously not to be taken literally (otherwise there would be a lot of people walking around with missing hands and eyes). Rather, He wants to underline how important it is that we take steps towards guarding our minds, not submitting to temptation.

Paul wrote to Timothy, “Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart” (2 Timothy 2:22). Sometimes it is as simple as that – flee the temptation! Delete the webpage; switch to another channel; walk away from person who might lead you astray.

I wonder, in which way does the devil tempt you in this area? Is God challenging you about what you watch on TV, or what you browse on your computer? Do you need to take control of any stray thoughts you might have about a person other than your husband or wife? What do you need to do to keep temptation away?

Continuing our journey through Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, last week we read:

“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister, will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.” Matthew 5:21-22

We asked the question that as followers of Jesus, how might we encourage an alternative narrative where our words heal and restore rather than hurt and divide? One answer is to ensure that we speak with grace towards each other, being careful what we say.

Jesus offers some more answers in the next part of his sermon. He continued, saying:

23 “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, 24 leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.

25 “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26 Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.” Matthew 5:23-26

The reality of life is that sometimes we do hurt and offend others. We may not always mean to, but when we are angry or stressed, we might say things we later regret. We might make a decision we didn’t realise would cause trouble for others. We can try to avoid hurting others by being careful with our words, but if an offense has been caused, what can we do to put it right?

Verses 23 – 24 of Matthew 5 reminds us that our relationships with each other are important to God. So much so, Jesus says that we should seek to put them right even before worshipping God or participating in church activities (“offering your gift at the alter” in verse 23). It seems the Lord wants us to make it a top priority to be reconciled with those we might have hurt or offended. Above anything else. We need to go to the person and try to mend the relationship.

In verses 25 – 26, the situation described is even worse. Imagine wronging a person so badly that they decide to take you to court. Jesus obviously doesn’t want things to get that far. Again, he encourages us to go to the person and talk to them. Try to find a peaceful solution.

Hurts are easily caused by words, but restored relationships can be found through words too. Words have power and God has given us the authority and freedom to wield that power. Let’s resist the urge to divide but lean towards the precious art of reconciliation.