Ep. 10- Alisha Barnard & the Ehlers-Danlos gap.

This episode closes out the first season of the gap cast with a deeply personal conversation between Jim Barnard and his wife, Alisha. They reflect on 20 years of marriage, Alisha’s chronic illness journey with Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, and how faith, humor, and honesty have shaped their family story.

In this episode, Jim and Alisha talk openly about vulnerability, neurodiversity in parenting, and what it means to live with constant expectation gaps while still choosing joy and trust. It’s equal parts testimony, marriage conversation, and practical encouragement for anyone navigating hard things.

Key topics

• Alisha explains her chronic illness in her own words, including Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, severe gastric issues, and the long road through diagnosis and treatment.
• The conversation covers the pain and awkwardness of “poop school,” biofeedback, and the emotional cost of living with a body that does not function normally.
• Jim and Alisha discuss how suffering has deepened their faith, making Jim less of a “nice Christian” and more of a desperate one who depends on Jesus.
• They name one of the hardest expectation gaps as the fear of being a burden to the people she loves, especially Jim and Anderson.

Timestamps

01:55 - Welcome to the Gap Cast and introducing Alisha as the guest

04:16 - Processing the Anderson episode (ep.1) and choosing authenticity

07:33 - Saying yes to tiller, nonprofit work, and faith-led risk

11:53 - Twenty years of marriage and why they still choose each other

16:44 - Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and the realities of gastric breakdown

20:26 - Mayo Clinic, diagnosis, and the road to answers

25:39 - Seventeen years of liquid diet life

27:54 - Wrestling with healing, suffering, and John 9

34:34 - Moving from a “nice Christian” to a desperate one

37:53 - The hardest expectation gap: feeling like a burden

43:17 - Carrying burdens like a Sherpa and casting anxiety on Christ

49:50 - Palliative care, meaning, and finding beauty in hardship

53:55 - Humor as survival, including dark jokes and perspective

56:34 - Launching into the “oldlywed game”

73:56 - How to pray for Alisha and what she wants people to know

76:09 - Closing the season, audience support, and what comes next

Notable quotes

“The power of God can be on display through you and through us, through our story.”

“I’m not in control, and it’s okay to not be in control.”

Resources & Links:

• tiller coaching.
• tiller instagram
• tiller youtube
• tiller substack

Ep. 9- Carlos Sanchez & the military expectation gap.

Jim Barnard talks with Carlos Sanchez, a tiller coach, Army veteran, and longtime ministry leader, about the gap between military expectations and reality, the impact of combat and loss, and how faith and counseling helped him heal. Carlos also shares how his path moved from YWAM and military service into coaching men, couples, veterans, and pastors.

They also get personal about church, community, barbecue, Cowboys football, and the unlikely chain of events that led Carlos from a Starbucks patio in high school to ultimately joining tiller coaching.

Timestamps

00:00 - Pre-show banter, wardrobe jokes, and the Gapcast dance-off

02:23 - Jim introduces Coach Carlos as “Crazy Carl” and the episode gets rolling

04:21 - The unusual 20-year Army career in psychological operations

07:31 - Staying stationed at Fort Bragg for two decades

09:51 - Growing up in Dallas and why Texas pride never left

10:46 - The episode’s main question: the expectation gaps of military life

12:44 - Combat loss, grief, and the myth of “I’ll deal with it later”

15:03 - Counseling, coaching, and mentoring as part of real recovery

19:48 - Why talking about his the death of his “little brother” became a way to honor his life and legacy

21:33 - Carlos’ conversion at 14 and his early fire for the Lord

24:08 - YWAM, faith, and a providential connection on a Starbucks patio

29:36 - The drift from faith during college and early adulthood

35:22 - His return to church leadership after coming back from Iraq

39:16 - How Manna Church’s military highway vision connected Carlos and Jim

44:23 - Jim explains why he believed Carlos was called to tiller coaching.

48:55 - Lightning round: barbecue, Cook Out, boiled peanuts, and Cowboys chaos

56:02 - The ask for prayer and financial support for tiller coaching—why the work matters: baptisms, restored marriages, and life change

62:13 - Jim closes with a reminder not to walk through the expectation gap alone

Notable quotes

“The military is a hard life for service members, for spouses, for families.”

“It’s the responsibility of good men to be better at violence than evil men are.”

“I can honestly say this: 100% of the things that I experienced in the military have a direct spiritual application.”

Action items

• If you are stuck in an expectation gap, don’t try to carry it alone.
• Reach out for coaching, counseling, chaplain support, or trusted mentoring when trauma or grief surfaces.
• For men, couples, pastors, veterans, or active duty service members who need help, Carlos points listeners toward tiller coaching.

Resources & Links:

• tiller coaching.
• tiller instagram
• tiller facebook
• tiller youtube
• tiller substack

Ep. 8- Tim Rogers is the newest & oldest tiller coach.

Jim Barnard sits down with Tim Rogers, a longtime leader, coach, and tiller coaching team member, to trace the career twists, faith lessons, and relationships that led him into coaching. They talk through Tim’s path from counseling and technology into senior living, how layoffs and retirement reshaped his calling, and why tiller’s work centers on discipleship, multiplication, and helping people navigate expectation gaps.

We discuss how Tim’s secular work experience sharpened his ability to lead and invest in people, how the tiller relationship began, and what it looks like to coach men and couples with spiritual depth and practical clarity. The conversation also includes a lightning round, some Louisiana humor, and a direct pitch for why more coaches and support are needed.

Key topics

• Tim’s early path from New Orleans to Colorado, including psychology, seminary, and earning a counseling degree
• Why his original plan to start a counseling practice shifted into technology, mortgages, and eventually senior living
• The toll of leading through COVID, including moral injury, family strain, and being laid off after years of service
• The idea of “retire to something,” not just retire, and how that led Tim toward coaching
• How Tim and Jim first connected through a church story about expectation gaps
• Why Tim donated to tiller before ever meeting Jim, then later became part of the board and coaching ecosystem
• The role of expectation gaps in career, marriage, leadership, and spiritual formation
• How Tim sees tiller coaching as discipleship, not just mental health adjacent work
• The concept of “duck praying” and why staying spiritually focused matters in coaching sessions
• How Tim measures success by walking away from deep coaching sessions energized rather than burdened

Notable quotes

“Retire to something.”

“If you get fired and you don’t know why, you haven’t been paying attention.”

“It’s about discipleship, it’s about multiplication, it’s about healing, it’s about growth.”

Resources & Links:

• tiller instagram
• tiller facebook
• tiller coaching.