Get weekly, radical resources and bonus episodes free at untamedember.kit.com — Your pleasure deserves better.

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Ever wondered why your brain is a full “hell yes” but your body suddenly ghosts the moment things heat up? Or why your nervous system sabotages even the sexiest situations? In this no-holds-barred episode, Dr. Misty goes full trauma nerd on the vagus nerve—that misunderstood highway running between your brain, your body, and your ability to actually stay present for pleasure.

We’re not talking about generic “just relax” advice or another meditation app download. We’re hacking your actual sexual nervous system with trauma-informed, neurodivergent-friendly, science-backed strategies. Discover:

• Why your vagus nerve can’t mind its business during sex (and how it becomes an accidental cockblocker)

• How chronic stress, trauma, and neurodivergence set the stage for “nervous system sabotage”

• The real reason arousal sometimes flips to anxiety, shutdown, or sensory overwhelm—and what to do about it

• Practical, immediately usable hacks for vagus nerve stimulation, breathwork, movement, and sensory support before and during sex

• Why the neurodivergent brain needs rituals and “transition time” for pleasure—and how to build them

This episode is for every beautifully complex, neurodivergent, queer, or trauma-impacted human who’s tired of being shamed for their body’s boundaries. Your sexual nervous system isn’t broken—it’s just never been given the tools (or the respect) it deserves. Let’s fix that.

Listen in, reclaim your body’s pleasure wiring, and don’t forget to grab your free worksheet in The Ember Vault.

• (00:00:00) - Introduction: The Mysterious Vagus Nerve
• (00:01:50) - Understanding Vagal Tone and Sexuality
• (00:02:47) - The Role of the Vagus Nerve in Sexual Response
• (00:05:23) - Challenges Faced by Neurodivergent Individuals
• (00:07:02) - Common Patterns of Vagal Dysfunction During Sex
• (00:09:40) - Daily Life and Its Impact on Vagal Tone
• (00:12:20) - Practical Interventions to Improve Vagal Tone
• (00:18:33) - Morgan's Transformation: A Case Study
• (00:21:28) - Specific Techniques for Common Sexual Difficulties
• (00:23:56) - Conclusion: Embracing Your Nervous System

Ever had sex with a partner who was physically present but clearly somewhere else? Welcome to the “What the Fuck Just Happened?” club. This episode is for every partner who’s ever wondered why their neurodivergent, trauma-impacted, or just beautifully complex lover seemed to disappear mid-connection—while their body kept going through the motions.

Dr. Misty (Untamed Ember) breaks down what dissociation really looks like during sex, why it’s not a Yelp review of your skills, and how to create the kind of safety that brings your person back—without pressure, shame, or performance. Learn how to spot the subtle signs, what to do (and NOT do) when it happens, and why real intimacy means honoring nervous system reality, not just consent on paper.

We’re throwing out the toxic scripts about sexual perfection, reclaiming what it means to love someone with trauma, and getting nerdy about co-regulation, nervous system signals, and non-performative presence. Bonus: Grab the partner’s worksheet in The Ember Vault for scripts, rituals, and reflection tools. Listen to the Untamed Ember podcast wherever you get your podcasts, and join The Ember Vault for weekly deep-dive worksheets at untamedember.com.

• (00:00:00) - The Secret to Intimate Sex With a Ghost
• (00:02:10) - This Is What Really Happens During Sex When Your Partner Dissoci
• (00:07:37) - How To Help Your Partner When They're Dissociated
• (00:10:34) - What to Do When Your Partner's Sexual Body Is Distracted
• (00:16:58) - How to Support a Partner Who Dissociates During Sex
• (00:20:21) - How to Support a Trauma Survivor During Sex
• (00:22:21) - How to Love Your Partner's Sexual Dissociation

Get weekly free resources and bonus podcast episodes—sign up for the Untamed Ember newsletter at untamedember.kit.com.

Ever felt like your body was sabotaging you during sex, even when your mind and heart were all-in? In this episode, Dr. Misty unpacks the wild world of somatic therapy and why your body’s “weird” responses are actually wisdom in action—not dysfunction. We’ll break down how shame, trauma, and neurodivergence shape our sexual scripts, and why honoring your authentic needs is the most revolutionary act of all.

This episode covers:

• The science of why bodies freeze, tense, or check out during intimacy (even with safe partners)

• SE, Hakomi, and TRE—somatic tools that let you finally listen to your nervous system (instead of fighting it)

• How to create a personalized “sexual map” so you know exactly what your body needs to feel safe and turned on

• Radical embodiment, embodied consent, and how to build authentic sexual healing without performance, perfection, or shame

Includes real stories, hands-on practices, and that signature Untamed Ember mix of humor, rebellion, and real talk.

Don’t forget: This week’s worksheet, “Your Sexual Somatic Intelligence Map,” is waiting in the Ember Vault at untamedember.com.

You are not broken. Your body is brilliant. And sexual healing starts when you finally learn to speak your body’s language.

#SexTherapy #Somatic #BodyWisdom #NeurodivergentSex #QueerSexEd #TraumaInformed #UntamedEmber

• (00:00:02) - What If Your Body Is the Problem With Sex
• (00:03:09) - Your Body Is Trying to Protect You From Sex
• (00:06:10) - Somatic Experiencing, or SE for short
• (00:09:24) - What Is Haikomi?
• (00:12:12) - TRE: Consent to Move Your Body
• (00:17:29) - The Sexual Practices You Need to Start Using
• (00:24:30) - This Week's Sexual Somatic Intelligence Map
• (00:26:51) - Untamed Women: Misty with