『Unboxing It with Lara and Rowan』のカバーアート

Unboxing It with Lara and Rowan

Unboxing It with Lara and Rowan

著者: Lara Wellman
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Lara Wellman and Rowan Jetté Knox are here to unpack all the topics that have us feeling confused, that keep us feeling small or stuck in shame, and that stop us from thriving as our authentic selves.

unboxingit.substack.comLara Wellman and Rowan Jetté Knox
社会科学
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  • 19: Aging and Your Career with Dani Donders
    2025/09/09
    Much of society thinks of retirement as the end of something important. And maybe that’s true. But what if it’s just the beginning of something… better? In this episode, Lara and Rowan chat with their longtime friend Dani Donders, who retired at age 55 (yes, we’re also envious) after a long career in the Canadian federal government and is now pursuing new creative ventures. Not only is she writing books and reading tarot cards, but she also teaches other women how to explore and embrace their creative side later in life through workshops.No matter where you are in life, this chat will give you food for thought. Age is just a number, and it shouldn’t stop us from living.LinksDani’s website - https://curiouscrone.ca/Curious Crone on YoutubeCurious Crone on InstagramA blog post by Dani inspired by one of our podcast episodesHow to find Dani’s book on rock wrappingWant more of Lara and Rowan?Rowan is available for speaking engagements, and Lara also shares a lot of her art on Instagram.Transcript(transcripts are not carefully edited and probably have some errors)[00:00:00] Dani: I call it the permission to try. People need permission to try new things, which is kind of crazy. Like how do we get to the point where you need permission? Is it okay if I mix the red paint and the blue paint?Well, yeah. It's your art. Welcome back to unboxing It. I'm Lara.[00:00:39] Rowan: And I'm Rowan.[00:00:41] Lara: And we are thrilled because we have a guest with us today and it's somebody that Rowan and I have both known for a long time and like a coming on decades, from the online space and who we think is the perfect person to bring a topic backup. So we've talked about aging once.We're gonna talk about it again. We're gonna talk a little bit about what it means in terms of career. What you do next, and I think it's gonna be a little bit of trying to disrupt the whole getting older means life is ending conversation. So welcome to the show, Dani Donders.[00:01:22] Dani: Oh my goodness. It is not an understatement for me to say this is a huge honor to be here with you guys.So thank you.[00:01:29] Lara: We are so thrilled to have you. I'm going to read an introduction of who Dani is for all of you, and then we're gonna jump into this conversation. So Dani Donders believes there is magic in storytelling and curiosity and creative expression, and in connecting with other humans now retired from a long career in government, Dani has dedicated her crone years to rekindling the spark of creative play in herself and in others.She hosts kitchen table workshops where friends can come together in an afternoon or evening of creative exploration. She does tarot card readings for events and parties. She continues to explore photography and creative print processes. She wrote a book on the creative art of rock wrapping.Dani also loves to share stories of her ongoing creative adventures and words, photos and videos across her small but mighty online empire, at curiouscrone.ca.Welcome, Dani.[00:02:25] Dani: You went with the long version. Thank you, Lara. It is genuinely a pleasure to be here.[00:02:30] Lara: Dani does so many things. But like in a way that I do them, so I'm excited.Right. I love meeting other people who naturally and instinctively do lots of things just because it's easy and it's fun and I find some people look at me like, what are you doing? But I know Dani doesn't.[00:02:47] Dani: All the things, that's what we're doing because everything is so interesting. And how can you just do one interesting thing when all the interesting things are out there?So yeah.[00:02:57] Lara: I hear you.[00:02:58] Rowan: This really flies in the face of the idea that I think a lot of media still perpetuates, and a lot of people still believe, oddly enough, in this economy that. Retirement means kind of just slowly fading out of life, right? Like you're, supposed to, I think in this idea that we have of, I'm gonna use the American dream, but I think it translates to a lot of different cultures that, you know, you go to school, you choose what you wanna do in school, which leads you to a job.You work a job, and then you retire from that job at a certain age, and then you. I don't know, maybe you go on a cruise or,you go golfing or , , I don't know, you basket weave or something. But that's pretty much it. And then perhaps, you live with your children or you go into, a retirement home of some kind, and then you fade away.So like that is not how you plan the, I don't even know what this era of your, I mean, did you call it the crone years? 'cause I kind of love that.[00:04:04] Dani: Yeah. And you know, the whole reason, like I created the Curious Crone Empire, because I wanted to pull together all the different things that I was passionate about.And I called it Curious Crone in particular because like, it's not. Necessarily fun aging and seeing in the media and, in the public sphere what aging, like you said, all the stereotypes ...
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    41 分
  • 18: Expectations
    2025/09/02
    “If I was a good person, I would—”“If you cared about me, you would—”“As adults, we should—”“In the workplace, we need to—”Um, says who?Like it or not, enumerable expectations are built into the fabric of society. What we expect of ourselves and others plays a profound role in shaping our relationship to the world and those around us. But who came up with these social rules, anyway? And why do we follow them? Are they fair? Do the expectations we’ve come to believe in improve our lives or do they create unnecessary anxiety, resentment or disappointment? In this week’s episode, we dig into why we have these sets of rules and guidelines, which ones to keep and which ones we might want joyfully yeet into the sun.If we missed some big ones, let us know! We’d love to do a follow-up episode. (Complaining about expectations is one of Rowan’s favourite activities on account of getting old.)Want more of Lara and Rowan?Rowan is available for speaking engagements, and Lara has coaching spots available.TranscriptLara: I think there's the part where. We think about what expectations have been put on us and how we want to deal with it and what we can and can't change in the moment.But the other part is what expectations have you put on other people and how is that impacting their lives? And how is it impacting your life? Welcome to unboxing it. I'm Lara.[00:00:43] Rowan: And I'm Rowan.[00:00:44] Lara: And today we're gonna talk about a thing that I decided to make a good topic when listening to somebody else's podcast. and you know, I don't even remember what they said in the podcast, but what I really got out of it is that people have a lot of expectations about their life.What it's gonna look like, what people are supposed to do, what would make you a good parent? What would make you a good friend? Like there's a lot of things that people have decided are very much the right thing to do, and now. That is just the expectation, and I think expectations can be good, but a lot of time they can be really a good way to set yourself up for disappointment and frustration, and also to set yourself up to go down paths that you don't need to go down.I would agree as somebody who held myself to what I thought were the expectations of society. Placed upon me to the point where it was like, I know I'm not a girl. But society tells me that I'm a girl, so I guess I have to be a girl. Okay. And now I have to, have to fall in love with and marry a man.And okay, what does that mean? I guess I have to find a man that I can be attracted to. 'cause I wasn't attracted to men.Mm-hmm.[00:02:08] Rowan: And it just kind of went on from there. Right. And so, spent a long time in my life trying to align. What I was doing with what I thought everybody else wanted and and that's an incredibly destructive thing.Unhelpful and doesn't really serve a purpose other than to perhaps make other people more comfortable.[00:02:33] Lara: Yes. I mean, this comes around to the whole. Thing that I believe, which is a lot of what we are taught to expect and to want and how we're supposed to do life is really designed to make some people happy and content right?Like when we follow the rules and do what they want, they have the life and society they want, and we never really spent any time thinking about what we wanted and choosing for ourselves.[00:03:02] Rowan: I think it goes back to childhood where, you know, even really early, like, and I don't wanna get stuck on like gender or sexual orientation.Like there's so many expectations that we place on ourselves and others all, all throughout society. But a really easy one for me is. You know, when I had my son, my first son, and I would bring him around, and even when he was a baby, people were like, there'd be another baby.I would say a little girl around. I was like, oh, do you have a little girlfriend? Do you have a girlfriend? You know, or like, he'd come home from school and, you know, somebody, you know, a neighbor , would see him and, you know, might say something like, oh, any girls that you like, you know, so the expectation was.He is supposed to enter a relationship with a girl. He's supposed to find girls attractive. It's like drilled into him from a really early age. As it turns out, he does find girls attractive, but what if he didn't? And that was the expectation. You know, , and he's being told that that is something that he's supposed to feel that he's supposed to do, right?Like, oh, do you have a little girlfriend? Oh, maybe you'll get married one day. You know? And it's like, so now the expectation is you find a girl and then you get married to her, and it just goes on from there. Like, when are you having children? When, not if. Do you want children or anything along those lines?When are you two planning on having kids? It just grows out. , It's this constant assumption that we all want a specific life.[00:04:38] Lara: Yeah. And that they talk to your baby and ...
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    35 分
  • 17: On the differences in all of our brains
    2025/08/26
    Growing up, we were largely taught there was a “normal” way of thinking, and that anything outside of that was weird and rare. In this week’s episode, we’re pushing back on that outdated narrative. From the way we see colour to the way we feel when music plays, everyone’s brain has unique qualities - so why does society push us to think and see the world the same way as everyone else?Lara discusses having aphantasia (the inability to form or use visuals in one’s head) and Rowan has a form of synesthesia (where the stimulation of one sense involuntarily ignites another). And the more we’ve talked to others about the way our brains work, the more we’ve realized everyone has a quirk or two in their own grey matter, whether they’ve been aware of it or not.It’s a fascinating topic, and we’d love to hear how you think your brain is different from other people’s. Drop us a line and let us know!(Also: Curious to know if you have aphantasia? This chart will help you figure it out. Rowan is a 1. Lara is a 5.)Want more of Lara and Rowan?Rowan is available for speaking engagements, and Lara has coaching spots available.Links:Lara wrote an article about her Aphantasia for the Aphantasia Network.Episode 10: Education doesn't always have to look the sameTranscript(Please note, these are not carefully edited and there may be some errors)[00:00:00] Lara: When you understand that other people's brains are processing information differently, then you can at least think, oh.This person is thinking differently, not this person is being obtuse, not this person is trying to be confrontational, not this person is just being silly. Hi everybody. Welcome back to unboxing it. I'm Lara.[00:00:44] Rowan: And I'm Rowan.[00:00:46] Lara: And today we are gonna talk about something that I think is fascinating. If you gave me the chance to talk about this, most of the time, I would gladly take it because I think it's so interesting and so fascinating and I just love. The human experience , in talking about it this way.[00:01:07] Rowan: We're all dying to know what it is.[00:01:09] Lara: I know, right?it is really about brains and how they're all different. And I think that we grew up thinking that most of us are the same. Right. That in general, the way we think, the way we see the world, the way we process things, that they are the same for most of us.[00:01:31] Rowan: Yeah, that there's like a normal[00:01:34] Lara: and that even that we think we know what that normal is like. Just like, oh, everybody is like this, and number one, it's not true. Brains are different in so many different ways, and when we accept that. And we believe that we can stop feeling like we aren't measuring up to this normal that we believe we're supposed to be.[00:02:00] Rowan: Yeah. This idea that having a brain that doesn't work like other people's brains in some capacity is somehow a flaw Is unfortunate and. In some cases when brains work differently, that can be a real strength.[00:02:20] Lara: It can, I totally agree. And I think, you know, this becomes a bigger conversation that we're having more and more in recent years because.There are more and more people who are being diagnosed with ADHD and autism. Both of those are a spectrum. So now you have people who range all through the spectrum talking about their experiences and not trying. To be okay all the time, but instead saying, Hey, this is actually how I think instead of believing, you have to force yourself into what you think is normal.And so there's all these conversations happening and I love that because I think it's important.[00:02:59] Rowan: I think it can be really validating for people to receive a diagnosis, especially in adulthood because a lot of us were. Different in some capacity when we were younger and often being different in that way meant that we struggled to fit in maybe socially or to do well academically in the conventional school system, which we have talked about at length already in another episode, we have.Made it so that if you are different, if your brain is different, that means that life has to accommodate that difference. And I actually do very strongly believe in accommodations. I do believe that. But the reason why I think, and this is I think a greater discussion, I'd love to hear other people's views on this, but I Am neurodivergent myself. I know a lot of neurodivergent people and neurodivergent simply means that your brain doesn't work in a neurotypical way, if you will. That baseline normal, and I'm using air quotes here, I think the reason why. We have to be accommodated as neurodivergent people as much as we do is because society operates in this way where everybody's brain is supposed to work the same way.So it just comes back to that messaging and if we accept it that there are these. Differences and that these differences are a part of life, a part of humanity, a part of evolution, perhaps. I mean, I don't know. I'm not a ...
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    41 分
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