The curtain has officially come down on the 2025/26 (thank goodness, Helen reckons).

In this episode, we are recapping our final day trip to Craven Cottage to face Fulham. It’s the final 90 minutes of a rollercoaster year, but this week the real action happened off the pitch.

The Final Day Review: We break down the tactical final stand of the season against Fulham. Did we finish on a high, or were we all just ready for the beach?

The Neighborly Negativity: We unpack the bitter, petty, and downright poor sportsmanship we’ve experienced from our 'friends down the road' recently. Why are they so obsessed with our downfall when they should just be celebrating their rare success?

Why Can't We All Just Be Nice?: We dive into a deep, philosophical (and highly emotional) debate on modern football fandom. Seriously, why is it so hard for some supporters to just be decent human beings? Is internet culture completely destroying the joy of the game?

Helen's Jelly Moment: The biggest talking point of the weekend. Helen completely loses all motor skills and turns into a literal bowl of jelly when she finds herself face to face and having an actual conversation with the sexiest man in football; Fabian Schar.

#NUFC #NewcastleUnited #ToonedIn #FulhamNewcastle #CravenCottage #PremierLeague #FootballFans #FinalDay

A winning send off at St. James' Park, but the co-host seat looks a little different this week!

With regular co-host Dave away on holiday, Helen is flying solo... well, almost. Together, Helen and Dave 2.0 break down a brilliant, 3-1 victory over West Ham that has sent the Hammers packing to the brink of the Championship and kept our hunt for the neighbors in 11th alive down to the final day.

In this episode:

We dissect Nuno’s bizarre back-three tactical gift to us..

Nick Woltemade shining in his proper No. 10 role

William Osula bagging an absolute beauty of a brace those post-goal dance moves?! 🕺⚽

Is it ever okay to secretly want your own team to lose? We dive into the complex psychology of the final weeks of the season when shifting league positions change everything.

The Kieran Trippier Legacy: An emotional 85th-minute standing ovation marked the final home appearance for the man who kickstarted the entire PIF era.

The 'Barcode' Debate: The 2026/27 Adidas home kit leaks are everywhere, and the reviews are... mixed. We give our unfiltered thoughts on the massive central black stripe and that controversial blue trim.

We’re back to dissect a bittersweet Sunday afternoon at the City Ground. Newcastle looked set to make it two wins on the bounce thanks to another clinical Harvey Barnes strike, only for our own academy graduate Elliot Anderson to pop up with an 88th-minute equalizer.

In this episode we also talk about:

* The Anthony Gordon 'Saga': With reports of personal terms agreed with Bayern Munich we ask the big question: Has Anthony Gordon played his last game in Black and White?

*Integrity & The Dark Side: We dive into a serious discussion on player integrity and the recent global headlines regarding match-fixing. How do we keep the beautiful game beautiful?

* The Final SJP Send-off: Looking ahead to Sunday’s massive clash against West Ham. The Hammers are 18th and fighting for survival, can we send them closer to the drop while hunting down the neighbors for that 11th-place spot?

There are only 180 minutes of football left this season. Let’s make them count.

​​After a dismal run of results, Newcastle United finally found their shooting boots at St. James' Park with a 3-1 victory over Brighton. Dave was actually in the stands for this one and he’s back to talk us through the atmosphere as William Osula, Dan Burn and Harvey Barnes secured the most important three points of the season so far.

​In this episode:

​Dave's SJP diary: From the pre match rituals to the feeling in the stands and what it felt like to finally see the lads win in person.

• Watching on Holiday: Helen talks about watching the Forrest game in Poland this weekend and the unique experience watching matches abroad with rival fans

• ​Rage bait reality: We take aim at the social media 'influencers' who seemingly have nowt nice to say win or lose

​Jacob Murphy Jacob Murphy-ing: How can we not mention Helen's main man deciding a training cone made for an excellent hat. Why did it happen? And more importantly, why did the internet lose its mind over it?

The curse is over, the vibes are back. Get Tooned In. 🖤🤍

Five losses on the bounce is never easy, but this week had a very silver (and black and white) lining.

In this episode, Dave and Helen dive into a disciplined but frustrating 1-0 defeat at the Emirates. We discuss whether a narrow loss to the league leaders counts as 'progress' and why we’re still struggling to find the back of the net when it matters most

In this episode:

The Arsenal Autopsy - Did we actually look like a functional football team again? We praise the defensive shifts of Botman and Thiaw and wonder what might have been if Wissa had tucked that late chance away.

The Woltemade Drama - We address the social media storm surrounding Nick Woltemade’s Instagram bio. Was removing the club tags a sign of a summer exit, or just a 24 year old having a digital spring clean?

Sunderland Schadenfreude - The Mackems being hammered 5-0 at home by Nottingham Forest. We revel in the chaos of a four goal first half and the sight of Mackems heading for the exits before the halftime pie had even cooled down.

One of Our Own - A truly emotional look at Elliot Anderson’s week. From the heartbreak of losing his mum to scoring the fifth goal at the Stadium of Light we discuss that moving tribute and why every Geordie was cheering for him on Friday night. 🖤🤍

Brighton Preview - Looking ahead to the visit of the high flying Seagulls. With Joelinton back from suspension, is this finally the game where the 'Podcast Curse' is broken?

HWTL! 🖤🤍

Is it the 'Tooned In' curse, or are we just allergic to a clean sheet at the moment?

​Dave and Helen are back to pick through the wreckage of a demoralizing Saturday afternoon at St. James' Park. Despite Will Osula keeping his scoring streak alive, a late collapse saw Bournemouth leave with all three points, leaving the Gallowgate searching for answers.

​In this episode:

​Dissecting the Defeat: Why are we struggling to hold onto leads? We talk about the 85th-minute heartbreak and why the 'Fortress SJP' vibe has gone cold in 2026.

​The 'Curse' is Real: We address the elephant in the room; the fact that Newcastle haven't won a single game since we started this podcast. Are we the hex?

​Injury Setbacks: We react to the mystery surrounding Anthony Gordon’s hip.

​Emirates Anxiety: Looking ahead to the daunting trip to North London this Saturday. Can we really stop a flying Arsenal side without our first choice backline?

​The Summer Rumour Mill: From Anthony Gordon being linked with Liverpool to the whispers of a massive sell-to-buy summer, we reaccess who stays and who goes.

​Whether you're a Howe inner or Howe outer, join us for some much-needed black-and-white therapy.

​HWTL! 🖤🤍

Dave and Helen are back to dissect a frustrating Sunday afternoon in South London after the 2-1 defeat to Crystal Palace. We’re talking about where it went wrong, whether the 'International Break Rust' is a real thing or just a convenient excuse and all the rest of the shirt pulling drama!

But there’s no time to dwell because the Cherries are coming to St. James’ Park this Saturday so we also look ahead to the Bournemouth clash, who we notoriously never beat.

Spoiler alert, it's a moany one!

With the international break over and 7 games left to play, Dave and Helen get their crystal balls out and discuss how they think the rest of the season will pan out.

- Is Eddie Howe's job really in jeopardy?

- Can we dare to dream of European football next season?

- Who do we think the summer movers and shakers will be?

- What does Dave think about Chelsea?

- How many times can Helen mention Jacob Murphy?

As usual, opinions are divided in the Tooned In studio (except perhaps over our love for a certain Brazilian captain). Do you agree with our predictions? Let us know in the comments!