If you've ever found yourself bitching about somebody, this episode is for you! Find a new way of seeing everyone else's behaviours.

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Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

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Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

Relationships (all relationships: friendships, family relations as well as intimate relationships) have a dynamic energy that is constantly in flux. Meg Harper and I talk about this ever-present tension between protecting ourselves as individuals (perhaps at the expense of a relationship) and protecting our relationship(s) perhaps at the expense of ourselves. We start with a quote from Marisa G Franco’s book: Platonic, which is all about attachment styles and how they influence the ways we operate in relationships.

Meg Harper's website: https://megharper.co.uk/

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

Trauma. This episode I build on Gabor Mate's metaphor that a trigger is just one part of what causes people problems. It distinguishes between "small t" and "Capital T" trauma. The latter is defined as experiences too terrifying for the psyche to process.

I talk about the "Window of Tolerance" model, featuring three zones: a green band (regulated state), orange bands (increasing disregulation), and red bands (hyper-arousal and hypo-arousal). The therapeutic approach emphasises keeping clients within their tolerance window, using the EMDR therapy metaphor of "building a bigger boat" to handle trauma gradually.

This episode contains passing reference to abuse.

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

'Being triggered' is so much more in our awareness than ever before. How do we identify our triggers and what can we do and what can we reasonably ask others to do to help us manage them? Psychotherapist, Emma McDermott, and I chat about it.

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

Episode Key Points:

• The Drama Triangle fundamentally revolves around control
• Focus on the Rescuer role as the most socially celebrated and potentially toxic position
• Rescuers often believe their worth is tied to how much they help others

Signs You Might Be a Rescuer:

• Feeling exhausted by constant requests for help
• Getting frustrated when people don't take your advice
• Finding others' suffering difficult to bear
• Believing your goodness is measured by how effectively you help

Key Insights:

• Society celebrates selflessness without teaching healthy boundaries
• Helping without limits can disempower others
• True support involves inviting others to find their own solutions
• Co-dependency occurs when both parties are controlling each other's lives

Therapeutic Approach:

• Learn self-worth independent of helping others
• Value others' perspectives and processes
• Recognize when "helping" is actually controlling
• Understand that withdrawing support can be a form of genuine care

Practical Advice:

• Ask "How can I support you?" instead of "What you need to do is..."
• Avoid lecturing or judging
• Set clear boundaries
• Recognize your own feelings of inadequacy driving rescue behaviors

Takeaway: Healthy support means empowering others, not solving their problems for them.

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

Most of us communicate in ways which are unhealthy at least some of the time. This episode, Nadine sits with Richard Chadwick to discuss the Drama Triangle, especially how the unhelpful roles of Rescuer, Victim and Persecutor are embedded in our culture and in our psyches.
I challenge you to not recognise yourself in here somewhere!

Richard Chadwick is a therapist working in the north west and online. You can view his BACP profile here.

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

In this special B-side episode, host Nadine hands the reins over to equine practitioner Alex Gulland. Alex walks you through the process of a first session in equine therapy, from initial client assessments, to a serene body scan amidst nature, and finally incorporating therapy with horses.
Alex brings you to Silver Birch Animal Therapy Farm, detailing the therapeutic benefits of working with horses and what clients can expect.
Alex Gullands's Links
www.contentedpeople.co.uk
www.silverbirchanimaltherapycic.co.uk

Music credit
https://artlist.io/

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay

How much do we know what is going on inside our bodies? How much do we ever really know about what we give off that other people around us are picking up on unconsciously (or consciously!)?
This episode, Equine Practitioner, Alex Gulland and I talk about how horses can be seen as emotional mirrors to our internal worlds. Horses, being prey animals, are incredibly sensitive to our energy, our stress levels and our emotions generally.
Alex shares how powerful it can be for people to work therapeutically with horses.
I am sure you will be able to hear how moved I have been by hearing some of the stories Alex told me during our conversation.
If you’re interested in finding or becoming an equine therapist, then a good place to start would be LEAP, this is where Alex trained: https://leapequine.com/.

Alex's links:
www.contentedpeople.co.uk
www.silverbirchanimaltherapycic.co.uk
Alex is raising money to support the arrival of several lovely foals at the Silverbirch centre - visit the GoFundMe page

Nadine's links:
www.thiswontfixyou.com
www.nadinepittam.com

Send me a text (Note: I can't reply, but I will read your comment and might respond to your message in a future episode)

Support the show

Nadine’s links:

Podcast: www.thiswontfixyou.com
Counselling: www.nadinepittam.com
Instagram: thiswontfixyou

Do you like and value what I do here? Show your appreciation by visiting my Buy Me A Coffee page where you can show your gratitude!

Subscribe in the podcast app of your choice.

If you like what you hear, please share with a friend…

Rest assured, if the idea comes from someone else I will always credit that person, and there is definitely water-tight confidentiality for my clients.




Find me at www.nadinepittam.com

Thanks to:

Helen Burrell for logo help

Audio is The Beat of Nature by Olexy from Pixabay