Your kid seems fine. Easygoing, no meltdowns. But when you ask how they're doing — nothing. "Fine." "I don't know." A shrug. And then one day you notice something's off, and you spend weeks trying to figure out what.
Sarah comes to Dr. Sheryl with exactly this. Her 10-year-old son is kind, resilient, good at everything — and totally unable to name what he's feeling. She's tried asking directly. She's tried asking sideways. She's modeled emotions, referenced Inside Out, sat on his bed and guessed out loud until something landed. And now, as his school closes and his whole world reshuffles, she can feel him shutting down again.
In this conversation, Dr. Sheryl helps Sarah understand what's actually happening under the surface — why even-keeled kids often pay a silent price for their regulation, how puberty complicates the picture, and why trying to get them to talk isn't always the right first move.
They talk through the "mixed feelings" shorthand, the power of asking about what your kid actually cares about (no agenda, no pivot to the real stuff), and — in one of the most specific pieces of advice you'll hear on this show — why getting your kid physically activated might open more doors than any question you could ask.
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Looking for more support in the in-between years of parenting? Good Inside Teen gives you practical tools, scripts, and expert guidance for the moments that can feel most overwhelming with tweens and teens.
Thank you to our partners for making this episode possible:
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- Girl Scouts: If you have a daughter in kindergarten through 12th grade, visit girlscouts.org to learn more
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