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  • The Hidden Strain of Caregiving and the Power of Reflection in Personal Change with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst
    2025/09/09

    About Gloria Vanderhorst: Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst is a licensed psychologist offering virtual therapy in Maryland and Washington, DC. With over 40 years of clinical experience, she has worked with preschoolers, teens, adults, and couples, guiding them through life’s challenges with compassion and expertise.


    Her therapeutic approach integrates Emotion Focused Therapy, Internal Family Systems, and Traumatic Incident Reduction. She focuses on healing early trauma, improving emotional functioning, and strengthening relationships. Dr. Vanderhorst also supports the court system with co-parenting guidance and reunification services for families.


    In her free time, she enjoys watercolor painting and playing her baroque recorder.


    In this episode, Brian and Gloria Vanderhorst discuss:

    • Balancing the overlapping demands of family caregiving and personal responsibilities
    • Using reflection and journaling as tools for growth and healing
    • The impact of cultural expectations on men’s emotional expression
    • How family stress affects the emotional needs of children and teenagers.


    Key Takeaways:

    • The journaling method of reading, reflecting, and responding allows people to unlock hidden memories and emotions stored in images or sensations rather than words, giving them a deeper understanding of how past experiences continue to shape their present.
    • Men are socially conditioned from infancy to suppress vulnerability and emotional expression, which not only creates lifelong struggles with intimacy and openness but also leads many to rely on unhealthy coping mechanisms that manifest physically and emotionally.
    • Parents who become consumed by the responsibilities of caring for aging relatives can unintentionally neglect their teenagers’ need for connection, making it crucial to intentionally carve out small but meaningful moments that reassure children of their continued importance.
    • Boys naturally begin life with a wider range of emotional expression than girls, but repeated subtle withdrawals and corrections from caregivers gradually narrow that range, teaching them to mute their feelings and leaving lasting consequences on their ability to fully experience and share emotions.


    "We deny men the capability of expressing themselves emotionally. We put them in a narrow little box." — Gloria Vanderhorst

    Connect with Gloria Vanderhorst:

    Website: http://www.drvanderhorst.com/

    Book: Read, Reflect, Respond - The 3 Rs of Growth and Change: https://www.amazon.com/Read-Reflect-Respond-Growth-Change/dp/1633023036

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gloria-vanderhorst-ph-d-730826b

    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drvanderhorst


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

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    28 分
  • Lessons on Planning, Support, and Survival from Life in the Sandwich Generation with John Fela
    2025/08/26

    About John Fela: John Fela (Felageller) serves as the Ministry Relations Manager at Joni and Friends Chicago, where he partners with churches to equip and train them to better support individuals and families impacted by disability. Before stepping into ministry work, John spent nearly two decades in education, teaching and leading in roles ranging from classroom teacher to school director. He lives in Lyons, IL, with his wife, Faith, and is the proud father of his son Christopher, who is autistic and nonverbal. In addition to his advocacy, John is a sought-after public speaker, podcast guest, and contributor to special needs platforms including Key Ministry’s Special Needs Family blog, Hope Anew, and The Mighty.


    In this episode, Brian and John Fela discuss:

    • Caregiving responsibilities across different generations
    • Financial and legal preparation for future care needs
    • Parenting a child with disabilities
    • Building support systems through community and faith


    Key Takeaways:

    • The overwhelming monthly expenses of long-term elder care—ranging from $5,000 to $8,000—often force families to liquidate assets such as homes, leaving children without inheritance and creating financial strain that lasts for years.
    • Establishing a special needs trust and working with a qualified special needs attorney ensures that children with disabilities can maintain eligibility for Medicaid and other state programs while protecting family savings for supplemental needs throughout their lifetime.
    • Many families postpone critical legal steps such as creating wills, assigning power of attorney, or establishing guardianship, which results in court intervention, delays in care, and significant stress when a parent’s health suddenly declines.
    • Beyond financial and legal preparation, caregivers must lean on both personal grounding—whether through faith or other belief systems—and trusted community connections to survive the emotional isolation, fatigue, and unpredictability that caregiving inevitably brings.


    "There is no such thing as too much [planning]… if you don’t have protections for your child, the system can very easily take advantage of them." — John Fela

    Connect with John Fela:

    Website: http://johnfela.com/

    Twitter: https://x.com/jfelageller74

    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/johnsspecialneedsblog


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

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    26 分
  • Balancing Independence and Safety While Planning for Aging Parents with Dr. Corinne Auman
    2025/08/19

    About Dr. Corinne Auman: Dr. Corinne Auman is a recognized gerontologist with over 20 years of experience working directly with older adults and their families and is the author of Keenagers: Telling a New Story about Aging.


    She is a Nationally Certified Guardian, Certified Senior Advisor, and an Advanced Professional member of the Aging LifeCare Association. She received her Ph.D. from NC State University, where she studied developmental psychology with a specialty in adulthood and aging.


    Dr. Auman speaks to audiences about aging in America and the real-world impact of age bias.


    As a gerontologist with a profound commitment to making a difference, Dr. Auman continues to champion the cause of older adults and their families. Her multifaceted approach, encompassing caregiving, education, activism, and authorship, positions her as a true advocate for a new narrative around aging.


    In this episode, Brian and Dr. Corinne Auman discuss:

    • Caregiving challenges faced by families juggling multiple responsibilities
    • Guidance and coordination provided by care managers in eldercare
    • Conflicts between independence and safety during the aging process
    • Planning ahead to prepare for future aging and caregiving needs


    Key Takeaways:

    • Families often avoid discussing or preparing for eldercare until a crisis forces them to act, which results in costly mistakes, stress, and lost opportunities for financial support that could have been available with proactive planning.
    • A care manager can serve as a central coordinator—helping families understand their options, connect with resources such as VA benefits, and make informed decisions that can prevent financial and emotional exhaustion.
    • Adult children frequently face painful choices where they must prioritize safety over their parents’ desire for independence, leading to guilt and conflict, yet care managers emphasize that cognitively intact elders still have the right to make risky decisions.
    • Hiring a neutral third party to evaluate care situations can ease family tensions, provide objective reassurance about safety and well-being, and create balanced solutions where both elders and adult children feel respected and supported.


    "There's always this push-pull between freedom, which is what our older adults typically want, and safety, which is what our adult children want." — Dr. Corinne Auman

    Connect with Dr. Corinne Auman:

    Website: https://corinneauman.com/ & https://www.navigateseniorcare.com/

    Book: Keenagers: Telling a New Story about Aging: https://corinneauman.com/books/

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/corinneauman/


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

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    21 分
  • How Marriage Survives the Sandwich Generation Stress with Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin
    2025/07/08

    About Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin: Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, M.S., LCPC is a marriage therapist, Imago Relationship Therapy expert, and founder of The Marriage Restoration Project. With nearly two decades of experience, he specializes in helping couples, families, executives, and teams repair and transform high-stakes relationships through his proprietary Relationship & Repair Intelligence™ (RQI) framework. Known for turning breakdowns into breakthroughs, he guides clients from reactivity and conflict toward curiosity, connection, and deep trust. Whether working with couples on the brink of divorce or leadership teams in distress, Rabbi Slatkin brings clarity, compassion, and practical tools to foster lasting repair. He also consults with organizations seeking to improve psychological safety, communication, and culture.


    In this episode, Brian and Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin discuss:

    • Navigating marriage and relationship challenges while managing caregiving responsibilities
    • How past emotional wounds affect present-day communication in relationships
    • The importance of intentional self-care within high-stress family dynamics
    • Tools and strategies to restore and strengthen emotional connections in couples


    Key Takeaways:

    • Many relationship conflicts are intensified not by the present moment but by unresolved emotional wounds from childhood, making it essential for each partner to become aware of their triggers and how they project them onto their spouse.
    • Instead of relying solely on slow-moving weekly counseling, couples in high-stress or crisis—like those in the sandwich generation—can benefit from immersive two-day intensives that offer rapid communication tools and emotional reconnection.
    • Even amidst overwhelming responsibilities, setting aside just ten undistracted minutes per day with each child can foster emotional security and prevent them from internalizing the household’s adult stress and tension.
    • Learning to pause and emotionally regulate before engaging with loved ones—especially after a stressful day—can dramatically reduce reactive behavior and create more intentional, calm, and loving family interactions.


    "Your marriage is what’s going to give you the strength to your modeling for your children a healthy relationship." — Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin

    Connect with Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin:

    Website: https://themarriagerestorationproject.com/

    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/rabbishlomoslatkin

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/themarriagerestorationproject/

    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/themarriagerestorationproject/

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marriagerestorationproject/

    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

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    19 分
  • Why Letting Go Doesn't Mean Letting Them Back In with Katharine Giovanni
    2025/06/24

    About Katharine Giovanni: Katharine Giovanni is a three-time award-winning, best-selling author, international speaker, and Transformation Mentor with over two decades of experience. She specializes in intuitive development, emotional healing, and forgiveness, helping individuals release guilt, shame, and long-held emotional patterns.

    Before stepping into this work, Katharine was a recognized pioneer in the global concierge industry. She authored The Concierge Manual, trained professionals around the world, and worked with several Fortune 500 companies. Her work has been featured on Good Morning America, ABC News Nightline, MTV, Time, Forbes, and The New York Times, and she has appeared on over 120 podcasts globally.

    She’s handled VIP clients, cosmic insights, and everything in between. Sometimes at the same time.


    In this episode, Brian and Katharine Giovanni discuss:

    • Navigating complex emotions while caring for aging parents and raising children
    • The psychological burden and long-term impact of unresolved family trauma
    • Understanding and practicing forgiveness for personal emotional freedom
    • Emotional energy and its influence on mental and physical health


    Key Takeaways:

    • Katharine’s forgiveness system offers a practical, step-by-step method to process emotional pain privately by listing people to forgive, ranking their emotional weight, and addressing each one gradually to create space for healing.
    • Forgiveness is reframed not as reconciliation or approval, but as a personal decision to evict painful memories and people from your mental space so they no longer drain your energy.
    • Even in cases of trauma where direct forgiveness feels impossible, emotional relief can begin by forgiving the energy around people, objects, or environments tied to the memory.
    • Letting go of emotional residue, even without forgetting or interacting with those involved, can significantly reduce stress, improve well-being, and unlock the ability to move forward in life.


    "Forgiveness for me is very simple—I want you out of my head, and I want to live my life again with you, not in my head." — Katharine Giovanni

    Connect with Katharine Giovanni:

    Website: https://www.katharinegiovanni.com

    Book: The Ultimate Path to Forgiveness: https://www.amazon.com/Ultimate-Path-Forgiveness-Unlocking-Power/dp/1931109265

    LinkedIn: http://www.linkedin.com/in/katharinegiovanni


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

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    23 分
  • How Identity and Purpose Transform the Caregiving Journey with Len Hayduchok
    2025/06/10

    About Len Hayduchok: Len Hayduchok is a Certified Financial Planner™ with over 25 years of experience in the financial services industry. He is the founder and President of Dedicated Financial Services and Dedicated Senior Advisors, where he delivers comprehensive wealth management solutions for individuals approaching or living in retirement. A graduate of both the Wharton School of Business and Biblical Theological Seminary, Len combines financial expertise with a values-driven approach. With advanced training in securities and life insurance, he is deeply committed to acting in his clients’ best interests. Beyond his advisory work, Len is passionate about education, regularly providing resources and guidance on a wide range of retirement-related topics to both clients and the broader community.


    In this episode, Brian and Len Hayduchok discuss:

    • Caregiving identity dynamics
    • The emotional and financial strain of elder care
    • Disruption of personal fulfillment and purpose
    • Navigating family roles and relationship boundaries


    Key Takeaways:

    • When adult children begin to see themselves as caregivers rather than sons or daughters, it creates emotional and relational dysfunction that undermines both their well-being and their connection with their parents.
    • Accepting that you cannot be the sole provider of care—physically or financially—allows you to prioritize more critical roles in your life, such as being present for your children or sustaining your career, without living under the weight of guilt.
    • Utilizing available resources like Medicaid and redefining what “support” really means can help families avoid devastating financial sacrifices while still honoring and caring for aging parents in meaningful ways.
    • True peace and lasting fulfillment are found not in over-functioning for others but in aligning your actions with a deeper identity rooted in love, purpose, and acceptance of your human limitations.


    "What we do doesn't define us, but the more we do something, the more we become that person who does that thing." — Len Hayduchok

    Connect with Len Hayduchok:

    Website: https://maxamazing.com/ & https://dedicatedfinancial.com/

    Show: MaxAMAZING Your Retirement: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/maxamazing-your-retirement-with-len-hayduchok/id1702480610

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dedicatedfinancialservices/


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

    Sign up for your FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER at www.stuckinthemiddlenews.com

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    27 分
  • Finding Flexibility and Purpose in Your Work Life with Sarah JanTausch
    2025/05/27

    About Sarah JanTausch: Sarah JanTausch is a speaker, coach, and founder of SRJ Coaching & Consulting, specializing in values-based careers and generosity-based networking. With a rich background in government leadership roles under Ohio Governor John R. Kasich, she brings extensive experience in public outreach, program management, and advocacy. Sarah holds a Bachelor’s in Politics & Government and a Master’s in Management and Leadership, and actively contributes to career development communities. Outside of work, she enjoys community volunteerism and quality time with her family and cats.


    In this episode, Brian and Sarah JanTausch discuss:

    • Strategic approaches to job searching and professional development
    • The importance of workplace flexibility and aligning career values
    • Leveraging networking and personal assessments for career growth
    • Overcoming career stagnation through strategic personal development


    Key Takeaways:

    • Clarify your core values to assess whether your current role or employer aligns with what truly matters to you, and look for ways to lean into those values even before making a big career shift.
    • Start small with career changes—even if you feel “handcuffed” by responsibilities, begin exploring potential paths now, since meaningful transitions can take a year or more to plan effectively.
    • Use a two-pronged job search strategy: combine selective, high-quality job applications with "generosity-based networking" to uncover opportunities in the hidden job market.
    • Tailor your resume into focused “buckets” aligned with different interests or skills, rather than one generic version, to increase your chances of breaking into multiple career directions.


    "I help people identify the work that they really want to be doing... finding those passions and aligning with their work, with their lifestyle, because flexibility is really important, I think, especially for most people today." — Sarah JanTausch


    Connect with Sarah JanTausch:

    Website: https://www.valuesbasedcareers.com/

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarah-jantausch/

    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093106125367

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarah_jantausch/

    Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/12iyEjLB28I96APWmFcuuc


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

    Sign up for your FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER at www.stuckinthemiddlenews.com

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    21 分
  • How to Make the Right Choices for Elder Care Without Regret with Amy Friesen
    2025/05/13

    About Amy Friesen: Amy Friesen is a senior living expert, business coach, and the Founder and CEO of Tea & Toast Inc. She leads a team that helps families navigate eldercare decisions and supports professionals in building thriving senior care businesses. A best-selling author and speaker, Amy is known for her clear guidance and compassionate approach. She is also a Forty Under 40 honoree and the 2019 Emerging Entrepreneur Businesswoman of the Year.


    In this episode, Brian and Amy Friesen discuss:

    • Navigating the challenges of eldercare and making decisions for aging parents
    • Financial, legal, and logistical planning required for long-term senior care
    • The emotional and relational strain of being in the “sandwich generation”
    • The role of advocacy and proactive communication in caregiving transitions


    Key Takeaways:

    • Proactively initiating conversations around aging, care needs, and future plans—long before a medical or safety crisis arises—can help families avoid panic decision-making and allow for thoughtful, step-by-step preparation.
    • Because assisted living and retirement communities offer widely varying levels of care and amenities, asking detailed questions (like whether they support two-person transfers or palliative care) is essential to ensure the facility can accommodate future health decline.
    • Visiting senior care facilities at unpredictable times—not just scheduled visits—can reveal the true quality of care and hold staff accountable, as consistent, unscheduled check-ins often lead to noticeable improvements in attentiveness and service.
    • Without early access to critical legal and financial documents like powers of attorney, wills, and long-term care directives, caregivers risk making uninformed or delayed decisions during emergencies, potentially compromising their loved ones’ safety and wishes.


    "What you want to make sure is that you don't run out of money, that you've budgeted properly, and that you don't run out of care." — Amy Friesen

    Connect with Amy Friesen:

    Website: https://www.amyfriesen.com/ & https://www.teaandtoast.ca/

    Book: Breadcrumbs by Amy Friesen: https://www.amazon.com/Breadcrumbs-Familys-through-Eldercare-Journey-ebook/dp/B0DJ3HGC7V

    LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/amyfriesen1


    Host contact information: 

    • Email: briansacksnewsletters@gmail.com

    

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    26 分