In this deeply honest conversation, we unpack divorced parenting, co-parenting expectations, and the emotional reality behind what it actually looks like when two people separate but still share children.

One host shares openly that she doesn’t fully resonate with the word “co-parenting” in her situation — and that becomes the foundation for a raw, layered discussion about communication breakdowns, emotional triggers, healing timelines, and the difference between intention vs reality after divorce.

At its core, this episode is about acceptance — not of perfection, but of reality. And learning how to move forward when the picture you once had no longer exists.

“You can’t fix someone else’s experience of divorce — you can only manage your own.”

Raw. Honest. Unfiltered. Real life parenting after separation.

00:00 – Intro: Divorced parenting vs co-parenting
04:10 – What “co-parenting” actually means (vs reality)
08:35 – Default parent dynamic carries into divorce
13:20 – Trying to create “healthy co-parenting” early on
18:45 – Emotional triggers when communicating with an ex
23:10 – Why separation doesn’t equal emotional distance
27:55 – Different expectations of divorce outcomes
32:40 – “You leave before you leave” discussion
37:15 – Why communication styles break down post-divorce
41:50 – Protecting kids while managing adult emotions
45:30 – The hope of peaceful co-parenting vs reality
49:10 – Identity shift: mother, wife, and now single parent
52:00 – Rebuilding life, stability, and emotional independence
55:10 – Final reflections: acceptance, growth, and moving forward

#ShesNotDone #CoParentingJourney #DivorcedParents #DefaultParent #MomLifeUnfiltered #MotherhoodUnfiltered #DivorceHealing #SingleMomLife #BlendedFamilies #ParentingAfterDivorce #EmotionalLoad #MentalLoadMoms #ModernMotherhood #RealParentingTalk #HealingJourney #RelationshipTalk #MomPodcast #HonestConversations #WomenSupportingWomen #LifeAfterDivorce #ParentingRealTalk

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

What does it really mean to be the "default parent"?

In this episode, Andrea and Kouelee dive into the invisible responsibilities that often fall on one parent—the mental load, emotional labor, decision-making, and constant availability that come with being the default parent. They discuss how children naturally gravitate toward one parent, why many moms struggle to "clock out," and how carrying the weight of a household can impact marriage, connection, intimacy, and personal identity.

From being touched out and exhausted at the end of the day to navigating resentment, communication breakdowns, and the challenge of trusting your partner to step in, this conversation is an honest look at the realities many parents experience but rarely talk about openly.

Whether you're married, divorced, co-parenting, or simply feeling overwhelmed by the mental load of family life, this episode will remind you that you're not alone.

Timestamps

00:00 – What being the default parent really means

04:30 – Why kids always seem to choose mom first

08:15 – The invisible mental load parents carry

12:00 – Did we unintentionally create the default parent dynamic?

16:30 – The importance of having a strong co-parent

20:45 – Feeling touched out and craving silence over connection

25:30 – How parenting exhaustion impacts marriage and intimacy

30:00 – Resentment, communication, and relationship breakdowns

34:45 – Surviving the toddler years and reconnecting as a couple

38:30 – Choosing a partner: what really matters when life gets hard

42:00 – Trust, reminders, and carrying the mental load

46:00 – Consistency, emotional safety, and why kids keep coming back to mom

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

Mom friends can be lifesavers—or leave you completely drained.

In this episode, Kouelee and Andrea dive into the complicated world of mom friendships: how they're formed, why some last a lifetime, and why others fade away. From awkward playground small talk and birthday party anxiety to finding the people you trust with your children, they explore what makes a true mom friend.

The conversation touches on parenting differences, trust, sleepovers, raising kids in Europe versus America, friendship after divorce, and the challenge of making meaningful connections as an introvert. Most importantly, they discuss how the best mom friendships often evolve into something much deeper: real friendship.

Whether you have one trusted mom friend or a whole village, this episode is a reminder that the right people make motherhood a little less lonely.

00:00 – Welcome back + the mom friend who recharged your battery

04:30 – Trust, playdates, and parenting differently than we were raised

09:00 – What makes a truly great mom friend?

13:00 – Why making mom friends as an adult feels so hard

18:00 – The different roles mom friends play in our lives

22:00 – Losing friendships, outgrowing people, and friendship after divorce

27:00 – Sleepovers, trust, and finding your parenting village

30:00 – Making mom friends as an introvert

31:30 – Final thoughts on friendship, community, and motherhood

#MomFriends #MotherhoodUnfiltered #MomsSupportingMoms #VillageMindset #FriendshipAfterKids #FindingYourVillage #IntrovertMom #RealMotherhood #MomConversations #ShesNotDonePodcast

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

In this episode of She's Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee tackle a topic that resonates with so many parents and women: the village.

We often hear people say, "It takes a village," but what happens when asking for help feels impossible? Is the village really gone, or have life experiences, disappointment, trust issues, guilt, and the pressure to be strong made it difficult to lean on others?

Andrea shares how divorce, single parenting, and years of being let down taught her to do everything herself—until life forced her to start asking for help. Through small moments of people showing up consistently, she learned that trust can be rebuilt and that accepting support doesn't make you weak.

Kouelee opens up about her struggle with vulnerability, control, and the fear of being perceived as anything less than strong. As a working mom, she discusses the guilt that comes with asking for help, the challenge of trusting others, and why she feels she hasn't fully built her own village yet.

Together, they explore the many forms a village can take—from family and friends to neighbors, fellow moms, schools, daycare providers, and community connections. They discuss how villages are often built intentionally over time and how support looks different for every family.

This conversation is an honest look at motherhood, trust, independence, and the courage it takes to let people show up for you.

Timestamps

00:00 – Welcome back to She's Not Done

01:15 – Is the village gone, or are we afraid to ask for help?

03:30 – Why asking for help can feel like weakness

06:00 – Being let down and learning not to rely on anyone

08:45 – Trust issues, control, and doing everything yourself

11:30 – The mental load of motherhood and partnership

14:00 – Why some women struggle to be seen as vulnerable

17:15 – Building a village versus expecting one to appear

20:00 – Community, friendship, and finding support outside family

23:00 – Divorce, trust, and relearning how to lean on people

26:00 – Mom guilt and the difficulty of accepting help

28:30 – Different parenting styles and different definitions of support

30:15 – How do you build a village when trusting people is hard?

31:30 – Final thoughts: You may not have a village, but you're not alone

#TheVillage #MentalLoad #MomGuilt #MotherhoodUnfiltered #MomSupport #WorkingMomLife #SingleMomLife #WomenSupportingWomen #AskingForHelp #ParentingPodcast #ShesNotDonePodcast #CommunityMatters #VulnerabilityIsStrength #TrustIssues #YouAreNotAlone.

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

In this deeply honest episode of She’s Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee unpack the invisible mental load women carry every single day — from motherhood and marriage to divorce, intrusive thoughts, burnout, resentment, and survival mode.

The conversation explores how emotional overwhelm impacts both mental and physical health, why so many women feel like they have to “do it all,” and the moment many women describe as “the switch” — when they finally stop accepting less and choose peace instead.

They also open up about intrusive thoughts in motherhood, feeling alone even while married, asking for help, the shame surrounding mental health struggles, and how resentment quietly builds in relationships when one partner carries the majority of the emotional labor.

This episode is a reminder that mental health struggles don’t always look like a diagnosis. Sometimes it looks like exhaustion, survival mode, constant anxiety, or feeling mentally tapped out. Most importantly, it’s a reminder that you are not alone.

00:00 – Mental load, relationships, and how resentment builds
03:10 – Open tabs in motherhood and emotional overwhelm
06:25 – When stress starts affecting physical health
09:40 – “The switch” women talk about after burnout
13:20 – Mom guilt, work commitments, and balancing everything
17:15 – The school pickup story and worst-case-scenario thinking
21:40 – Intrusive thoughts in motherhood and why nobody talks about them
27:05 – Feeling alone while overwhelmed and needing help
32:15 – COVID burnout, breaking points, and survival mode
36:50 – How mental overwhelm can spiral into mental health struggles
41:10 – Scorekeeping, resentment, and carrying too much in relationships
44:20 – Supporting others through mental health struggles and reminding people they’re not alone

#MentalLoad #MentalHealthAwareness #MotherhoodUnfiltered #MomLife #MentalHealthMatters #EmotionalBurnout #OverstimulatedMom #IntrusiveThoughts #MomMentalLoad #WomenSupportingWomen #MarriageTalk #DivorceHealing

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

In this deeply honest conversation, we unpack one of the most important and often avoided topics in relationships: financial independence in marriage and motherhood.

What does it really mean to be financially independent in a partnership? Should couples keep money separate, combine everything, or build a hybrid system based on income percentages?

We explore real-life experiences of balancing careers, motherhood, and marriage—and what happens when financial structures aren’t clearly discussed. From stay-at-home motherhood and unpaid labor, to divorce, 401Ks, and financial insecurity, this episode opens up the conversations many couples never have until it’s too late.

We also dive into:

• The emotional impact of not earning an income while raising children
• How financial control (or lack of transparency) affects relationships
• Divorce realities and rebuilding financial independence
• The importance of financial literacy for women
• Why “hard conversations” about money should happen early in relationships

This is not about right or wrong—it’s about awareness, preparation, and empowerment.

Whether you're married, divorced, a parent, or building your financial future, this episode will make you rethink how money, value, and partnership truly connect.

#momlife #momstruggles #workingmom #momtruth #financialindependence

00:00 – Feeling financially “less than” in a relationship
Opening reflection on self-worth and not contributing financially.

04:00 – Should women be financially independent in marriage?
Debate on separate accounts vs shared money systems.

08:00 – Percentage-based financial systems in relationships
How couples split expenses based on income ratios.

12:00 – The reality of being a stay-at-home parent
Sacrifice, home building, and invisible labor.

16:00 – Divorce and the financial shock afterward
Loss of security, income reduction, and rebuilding life.

20:00 – Unpaid labor and feeling undervalued
Emotional toll of raising children without financial recognition.

24:00 – Resentment, imbalance, and communication breakdown
How emotional and financial imbalance affects marriages.

28:00 – Financial literacy gaps women face
Credit cards, mortgages, and lack of financial education.

32:00 – Divorce, 401Ks, and legal financial complexity
Negotiations, retirement accounts, and legal systems.

36:00 – Society’s pressure on working vs staying home
Judgment, expectations, and conflicting standards for women.

40:00 – Value, control, and emotional labor in relationships
Feeling unseen when contributions aren’t monetary.

44:00 – Advice: financial independence & hard conversations early
Why couples should plan financially for “what if” scenarios.

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

In this episode of She’s Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee get brutally honest about the kind of exhaustion no one really prepares women for — the mental load, emotional burnout, motherhood guilt, relationships, divorce, marriage, and the pressure to “do it all.”

From being touched out by toddlers to carrying the invisible weight of everyone’s schedules, emotions, and needs, this conversation dives into what modern motherhood really feels like behind closed doors. They unpack the difference between traditional and modern women, why so many moms feel emotionally drained before physically tired, and how communication can either save a relationship or slowly destroy it.

The episode also explores friendships in adulthood, learning to say no without guilt, why women struggle to relinquish control, and the emotional role moms play as the “safe place” for their children.

This is the conversation every exhausted woman needs to hear — honest, validating, funny, emotional, and deeply relatable.

Because being exhausted doesn’t mean you’re failing…

00:00 – Intro + “Women entered the workforce, but men didn’t fully enter the home”
01:15 – Feeling exhausted and finally taking time to rest
03:10 – The difference between modern women and traditional women
05:45 – The pressure of carrying financial, emotional, and household responsibilities
07:30 – Mom guilt, needing breaks, and learning to say no
10:15 – Feeling emotionally “on” 24/7 as a mother
13:00 – Doing everything yourself and the resentment that builds
16:20 – Trust issues in relationships when help never follows through
19:10 – Marriage, communication, and how honest conversations saved their relationship
22:00 – Emotional exhaustion vs. physical exhaustion
25:15 – Mental overload and constantly thinking about the next task
28:40 – Learning to walk away, regroup, and stop fixing everything
31:20 – Friendships as adults and how exhausting one-sided relationships can be
35:00 – Isolation, shutting down, and overstimulation as a mom
38:10 – Being “touched out” and struggling to stay present with kids
41:00 – The invisible mental load moms carry every day
44:15 – Raising daughters differently and breaking generational patterns
47:00 – Double standards for moms vs. dads in parenting
49:10 – The shift happening in younger generations and relationships
51:00 – Final thoughts: learning to say no and remembering you’re not alone

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio

In this emotional Mother’s Day episode of She’s Not Done, Andrea and Kouelee dive into the complicated feelings motherhood can bring — pride, guilt, grief, healing, disappointment, and unconditional love.

They open up about the pressure and expectations surrounding Mother’s Day, the pain of feeling unseen, and how becoming mothers changed the way they viewed their own parents. From difficult mother-daughter relationships to breaking generational cycles, this conversation explores how childhood wounds can shape adulthood — and how healing begins when we choose to self-reflect instead of repeat patterns.

The episode also touches on learning to let go of unhealthy relationships, parenting with emotional awareness, apologizing to your children, and raising kids differently than we were raised ourselves.

This is an honest conversation about motherhood in all its forms: the beautiful, the heartbreaking, the messy, and the healing.

Because sometimes becoming a mother forces you to finally confront the child within yourself.

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio