Everyone says having kids changes your marriage—but does it make it stronger, or does it simply reveal what's already there?

In this honest conversation, we unpack one of the biggest myths about marriage and parenting. We discuss why children don't create relationship problems, how they amplify communication issues, the pressure of parenting styles, and why so many couples stay together "for the kids."

Andrea shares the heartbreaking reality of realizing divorce also meant giving up the dream of another child, while Coley reflects on how working through relationship struggles before having a second child changed her marriage.

Whether you're newly married, raising little ones, or wondering if your relationship is surviving the chaos of parenthood, this episode will remind you that you're not alone.

Timestamps

00:00 Cold open: "I've never heard anyone say a baby fixed their marriage."

01:20 Do people secretly believe another baby will save their relationship?

04:10 Why kids don't create problems—they expose them.

07:15 The exhaustion, stress, and pressure that change a marriage.

10:40 Andrea shares how divorce meant letting go of having another child.

14:05 Why parenting styles become the real source of conflict.

17:15 The resentment that builds when one partner isn't reliable.

20:30 Staying together "for the kids" and ignoring relationship problems.

24:15 Communication: when repeated conversations stop leading to change.

28:00 What healthy marriages do differently after kids.

31:10 Looking back: what we'd do differently before having children.

33:00 Final thoughts: Do kids bring couples closer—or expose the cracks?

Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done.

xxx Andrea & Kouelee

Here is where you can find us online:

Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/

Tiktok:
https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod

Youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod

Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio