In this episode of Rise: Hope and Healing After Sexual Betrayal, MaryAnn Michaelis LCSW, CSAT, CPTT, welcomes back Dr. Kevin Skinner to continue Season Two’s series on rebuilding trust. Together they explore why rebuilding trust after betrayal is so complex, especially through the lens of attachment and trauma, based on Sue Johnson's core attachment question: “Are you there for me?”

They explain how trust begins early in life, how it’s shaped by our experiences, and how betrayal trauma can mirror early attachment ruptures—often leading to protest, emotional overwhelm, shutdown, or feeling frozen while waiting for clarity or disclosure. MaryAnn and Dr. Skinner normalize grief, numbness, and uncertainty as natural trauma responses, not signs of failure or weakness.

This episode gently reframes healing: trust doesn’t begin with forcing yourself to trust a partner again. It begins with self-trust, learning to listen to your body and emotions, finding safe support, and allowing honesty about where you truly are. Trust, when it returns, is earned through presence, consistency, and repair—not pressure.

If you’re unsure whether you can trust again—or even trust yourself—this conversation offers compassion, clarity, and hope.

• Trust after betrayal is a process, not a decision

• Betrayal trauma activates deep attachment wounds

• Feeling frozen, numb, or unsure is a normal trauma response

• Self-trust is foundational to healing and boundaries

• Earned trust grows through consistent repair and safety

• The Still Face Experiment – Dr. Edward Tronick A visual illustration of attachment rupture and repair https://iceeft.com

• The Body Keeps the Score – Bessel van der Kolk, MD

• Human Intimacy Conference | March 13–14 Online conference featuring Dr. Skinner, MaryAnn Michaelis, Michelle Mays, Dr. Sheri Keffer, Dr. Karen Strange, Kris Cristiano, and more

Host: MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW, CSAT, CPTT Guest: Dr. Karen Strange, PhD, LMFT, CSAT, CPTT

Healing from sexual betrayal is not something anyone is meant to navigate alone. In this Season 2 episode of Rise: Hope and Healing from Sexual Betrayal, host MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW, CSAT, CPTT, is joined by colleague and friend Dr. Karen Strange, PhD, LMFT, CSAT, CPTT, for a deeply compassionate conversation about stabilizing after betrayal and rebuilding trust—first with yourself, and then, if appropriate, with a partner.

Together, MaryAnn and Karen explore betrayal through both clinical insight and lived experience, addressing the profound shock, grief, and disorientation betrayed partners often face. Using Brené Brown’s BRAVING framework, they break down trust into understandable, actionable components while emphasizing that trust is rebuilt through behavior over time, not promises or pressure.

This episode also introduces the powerful Kintsugi bowl metaphor—the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with gold—as a symbol of post-betrayal healing, growth, and meaning-making after profound rupture.

If you are early in betrayal trauma recovery, struggling with self-doubt, or feeling pressured to “move on” before you feel safe, this conversation offers grounding, validation, and hope.

• Why betrayal trauma often mirrors PTSD

• Stabilization as the first priority after sexual betrayal

• The Kintsugi bowl as a metaphor for healing after being “shattered”

• Why trust is cognitive, not emotional

• Brené Brown’s BRAVING framework applied to betrayal recovery:

  • Boundaries

  • Reliability

  • Accountability

  • Vault (confidentiality and discernment)

  • Integrity

  • Non-judgment

  • Generosity

• Trusting behavior over words

• Gaslighting, self-doubt, and learning to trust your body again

• The role of accountability, support groups, therapy, and sponsors

• Why over-disclosure can retraumatize betrayed partners

• Rebuilding trust with yourself through self-compassion

• Healing takes time—and time is your ally, not your enemy

• Trust is rebuilt through consistent, observable behavior, not urgency

• You are allowed to share your story; your partner owns theirs

• Self-compassion is foundational to stabilization and recovery

• Listening to your body is a powerful form of wisdom

• You can actively engage in healing while you wait for clarity

1. The BRAVING Self-Trust Exercise Write down B-R-A-V-I-N-G and reflect on what you need in each area to rebuild trust with yourself.

2. Daily Self-Compassion Practice Visit self-compassion.org (Kristin Neff, PhD) and choose a brief daily practice to support stabilization, reduce shame, and restore internal safety.

• Brené Brown – BRAVING: Trust Framework

• Kristin Neff, PhD – Self-Compassion Practices

• Therapist-led courses and groups for betrayed partners: humanintimacy.com

Dr. Karen Strange, PhD, LMFT, CSAT, CPTT, is a licensed marriage and family therapist practicing in South Carolina. She brings both professional expertise and lived experience as a betrayed partner, offering deep empathy, wisdom, and hope to individuals and couples healing after betrayal.

MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW, CSAT, CPTT is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, and Certified Partner Trauma Therapist. She is the founder of HART Recovery Institute (Healing Addiction, Relationships, Trauma) and the host of Rise: Hope and Healing from Sexual Betrayal. MaryAnn is also a recovering betrayed partner and a passionate advocate for trauma-informed, compassionate healing.

Please consider sharing, liking, or subscribing. You may help someone else feel less alone and more understood.

You deserve healing. You deserve wholeness. And you don’t have to do this alone.

Welcome to Season Two of Rise: Hope and Healing After Sexual Betrayal. In this opening episode, host MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW, CSAT, CPTT is joined by Kris Cristiano, LCSW, CSAT, to explore one of the most painful and misunderstood aspects of betrayal trauma: trust.

After Season One’s focus on immediate survival following discovery, Season Two shifts toward rebuilding—emotionally, relationally, and internally. MaryAnn and Kris unpack why trust cannot be rushed, demanded, or restored through checklists alone, and why safety and honesty must come first.

Together, they deconstruct common misconceptions about trust, love, and forgiveness, explore the impact of complex and cumulative trauma, and introduce tangible markers of real recovery—what betrayed partners can actually look for over time without abandoning themselves. The conversation also highlights the critical importance of self-trust, nervous system awareness, and relational healing within safe communities.

This episode offers grounding, clarity, and hope for anyone navigating betrayal trauma and wondering: How do I know what’s real now—and can I ever trust again?

• Why trust, love, and forgiveness are not the same thing—and why confusing them causes harm

• How betrayal trauma and complex trauma amplify the loss of trust

• The Marble Jar metaphor and why trust must be rebuilt one action at a time

• Why sobriety, compliance, and “checking boxes” are not the same as true recovery

• The role of honesty and safety as the foundation for rebuilding trust

• How betrayed partners can begin rebuilding self-trust, even after betrayal blindness

• Why healing from betrayal trauma is relational and cannot be done alone

• How shame and self-blame interfere with recovery—and why they don’t belong there

Key Takeaways:

1. Trust is a gradual process that requires honesty and safety as foundational elements.
2. Healing from betrayal involves understanding and dismantling complex trauma.
3. Recovery is not a checklist but a heartfelt journey of personal growth.
4. Building self-trust is crucial
5. Neuroception and listening to your own body and instincts.
6. A supportive community is vital for healing and offers essential insights and guidance.

After listening, take a moment to write down one small thing you will do for yourself today or tomorrow—something realistic and achievable. Rebuilding trust begins by doing what you say you’ll do, even with yourself.

• Blind to Betrayal by Jennifer Freyd

• The Intimacy Pyramid by Dan Drake and the Rapson-Smith model

• 25 Signs of REAL Recovery by Kris Cristiano

• Rise: Hope and Healing From Sexual Betrayal courses and resources: humanintimacy.com

• Human Intimacy Conference – March 13–14 Join us for insightful presentations, featuring leading experts in betrayal trauma recovery, including Kris Cristiano. Use PROMO Code: 40OFF

Connect With Us:

• Visit our website: humanintimacy.com
• Instagram: @HumanIntimacy

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Rise, Hope, and Healing After Sexual Betrayal: Closing Season One & Looking Toward Growth

Summary

In the final episode of Season One of Rise, Hope, and Healing After Sexual Betrayal, Dr. Kevin Skinner and licensed clinical social worker MaryAnn Michaelis reflect on the emotional journey of betrayal trauma and the foundational work required for healing. They validate the profound shock, grief, and disorientation that follow sexual betrayal, emphasizing that these reactions are normal responses to trauma—not personal failures.

Throughout the conversation, they review core concepts introduced in the season, including emotional regulation, triggers, PTSD symptoms, somatic responses, polyvagal theory, boundaries, self-care, and identity repair. Healing is framed not as a linear or finished state, but as a “both/and” process—one where growth and difficult days can coexist.

Using metaphors such as home remodeling, forest fires, peeling an onion, and run-walk marathons, they illustrate how healing unfolds slowly, layer by layer. They highlight post-traumatic growth, noting that while no one chooses betrayal, many survivors develop deeper self-awareness, stronger boundaries, renewed creativity, and a reclaimed sense of self-worth.

The episode also looks ahead to Season Two, which will focus on the second stage of healing—internal work, rebuilding trust (especially trust in self), and deeper application of tools learned in Season One. The hosts emphasize the importance of community, trauma-informed practices, and self-compassion, ending with a message of hope: healing is possible, identity can be restored, and no one has to walk this journey alone.

Resources Mentioned or Referenced

Programs & Educational Resources

• Rise, Hope, and Healing After Sexual Betrayal (Course) A structured healing course focused on assessments, internal work, parts work, boundaries, trust, and trauma recovery. Available via HumanIntimacy.com
• Rise, Hope, and Healing Podcast Focused specifically on betrayed partners and the stages of betrayal trauma recovery.
• Human Intimacy Podcast Broader conversations on intimacy, healing, and recovery.

Therapeutic Approaches & Concepts

• Betrayal Trauma & PTSD
• Post-Traumatic Growth
• Polyvagal Theory
• Somatic (Body-Based) Healing
• Emotional Regulation
• Boundary Setting
• Self-Compassion
• Trust (Self-Trust & Relational Trust)
• Group Support & Community Healing
• Trauma-Informed Yoga
• Mindfulness Practices

Professional Credentials Referenced

• CSAT – Certified Sex Addiction Therapist
• CPTT – Certified Partner Trauma Therapist

Clinicians Featured or Upcoming (Season Two)

• Dr. Kevin Skinner
• MaryAnn Michaelis, LCSW
• Dr. Karen Strange
• Chris Christiano
• Jennifer Johnson

Books & Metaphors Referenced

• Beauty for Ashes (Biblical concept/book title referenced for meaning-making and growth after loss)
• Resilience research by Dr. Al Siebert (resilient mindset and “both/and” healing framework)

In this powerful episode of Rise: Hope & Healing After Sexual Betrayal, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore one of the most painful and complex layers of betrayal—self-betrayal. While a partner’s betrayal is deeply damaging, many betrayed partners describe an even more devastating wound: the moment they realize they stopped trusting themselves.

We discuss the internal collapse that occurs when you silence your instincts, override your intuition, and ignore what your body and emotions tried to tell you. This creates deep internal chaos, confusion, and shame—because when you can’t trust yourself, where do you turn?

This conversation also explores the importance of reconnecting with your values, intuition, emotional truth, and a personal Bill of Rights. We talk about why so many partners abandon themselves in the name of survival, loyalty, fear, or hope—and most importantly, how to gently rebuild self-trust, re-align with your inner wisdom, and begin living congruently again as you move into stabilization and deeper recovery.

• Book: Treating Trauma from Sexual Betrayal — Dr. Kevin Skinner

• Concept Guide: Creating a Personal Bill of Rights After Betrayal Examples may include:

  • “I have the right to trust my intuition.”

  • “I have the right to emotional and physical safety.”

  • “I have the right to ask questions and receive truthful answers.”

• Support & Education

  • Rise Podcast & Healing Resources at HumanIntimacy.com

  • Human Intimacy 100-Day Healing Programs & Courses

• Helpful Therapeutic Approaches

  • Trauma-informed therapy / CSAT or CPTT clinicians

  • Somatic and body-based healing approaches

  • Boundary and values clarification work

If you’re looking for deeper healing, education, community, and hope, we invite you to join us at the upcoming Human Intimacy Conference. This powerful event brings together leading experts in betrayal trauma, recovery, and relationship healing—offering tools, insight, and connection to support your journey.

👉 Register here: https://humanintimacy.zohobackstage.com/HumanIntimacy2ndAnnualConference#/

In this episode of Rise: Hope and Healing After Sexual Betrayal, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore what it truly means to “find your voice” after betrayal. Many betrayed partners struggle to express overwhelming emotions such as anger, grief, confusion, and fear—often because they’ve never had permission, language, or safe places to speak their truth. Others feel they do have a voice, but need support in finding the right words and safe settings to tell their story.

Dr. Skinner and MaryAnn discuss why expressing your story matters both emotionally and physically, highlighting research showing that suppressed emotions can increase depression and weaken the immune system. They talk about grief, trauma integration, and the importance of consolidating your narrative—what life felt like before betrayal, what changed after discovery, and how the experience is shaping your life now.

Listeners will learn about healthy ways to express deep emotions (journaling, burn journals, therapy, group support, safe body-release strategies), the importance of being witnessed, and how finding your internal voice strengthens boundaries, empowerment, and healing. This conversation reminds every betrayed partner that your emotions matter, your story deserves space, and giving voice to your experience is a vital step toward recovery.

• RISE: Hope & Healing After Sexual Betrayal Online Course Guided exercises, assessments, journaling prompts, education, and structured healing tools to support your journey. https://www.humanintimacy.com

• Research on Expressive Writing & Emotional Health James W. Pennebaker – Opening Up: The Healing Power of Expressing Emotions Demonstrates the mental and physical health benefits of expressing emotions and telling your story.

• Healing Requires Witnessing & Storytelling Desmond Tutu & Mpho Tutu – The Book of Forgiving Discusses the importance of sharing your story, being witnessed, and honoring emotional wounds.

• Trauma & Meaning-Making Framework Discussion of narrative processing and trauma consolidation – understanding life before betrayal, the traumatic event itself, and how it changes you going forward.

• Support Through Connection Research highlighted by Wendy Watson Nelson & Dr. Jill Manning emphasizing connection and safe support as a critical factor in betrayal recovery.

• Therapy & Group Support Consider working with a betrayal-informed therapist or joining a betrayal trauma support group to process your experience safely.

In this episode of Rise: Hope & Healing from Sexual Betrayal, Dr. Kevin Skinner and MaryAnn Michaelis explore why boundaries are essential—not optional—for healing. They clarify common misunderstandings about boundaries, emphasizing that boundaries are not punishments, ultimatums, or attempts to control another person. Instead, they are acts of self-care rooted in values, safety, and personal responsibility.

Drawing from clinical experience, real-life examples, and research-based frameworks, the conversation breaks down how boundaries function as “if–then” statements focused on how you will respond to protect yourself. The episode highlights the difference between healthy boundaries and rule-setting, the role of self-trust and follow-through, and why understanding your why is the key to confidence and consistency.

Listeners will learn how boundaries support emotional safety, reduce resentment, and strengthen the inner core—especially after betrayal has shattered trust. The episode also addresses the fear that boundaries will damage relationships and reframes boundaries as a pathway to clarity, dignity, and, when possible, deeper connection.

• Healing rarely occurs without clear, self-honoring boundaries

• Boundaries are about your response, not controlling someone else

• Effective boundaries are rooted in values, needs, and self-awareness

• Boundaries support safety, self-trust, and differentiation

• Letting go of outcomes is essential when setting boundaries

• Practicing boundaries builds confidence and reduces resentment

• Boundaries Course – Creating & Maintaining Healthy Boundaries Available at Boundary Basics

• Rise online Course: HumanIntimacy.com

• Vicki Tidwell Palmer, Boundaries Handbook for Women

• Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend, Boundaries

• Differentiation of Self (Bowen Family Systems Theory)

• Human Intimacy Courses & Educational Resources