We kick off with those toilet roll holders that feed you the tissue from the middle. Bliss when they work. Absolute crisis when they don't. Autumn and the aesthetic purchasing of shite - NOPE

Dunn arrives with the revelation that’s pleasing to a menopausal woman; it surprisingly costs very little! Conversations on a girls' weekend away, and the frank comparison of body bits and how, at this stage of life, we're genuinely not arsed!

There's a brand new segment too. FACT OF THE WEEK. Who knew.

A few more pointless Break A Take brainwaves, and we've decided Marilyn needs to get back to looking out of that window.

WIDL - CRASHOUT, and it's not what you think. Nothing to do with being knackered on a comfy chair

What Gets On Ya Tits returns with a fair few that'll land uncomfortably close to home. Simple things, yet deeply annoying.

And Harry has released. Nothing whatsoever to do with the hamster Turns out a dog can reach levels of joy rolling in a dead frog!

Out now, wherever you get your podcasts. Don't miss us

We are absolutely fed up of this hot weather, and even more fed up of sweaty tits. We're calling it now: it should be illegal to wear a bra in anything over 28 degrees. And spare a thought for the poor G-cup ladies, they're basically running a personal sauna under without the need for coals.

This week's anagram is "Fungal Membrane." See what words you can make from the letters, we managed "Flambe Gunman Ere," so the bar is not high.

Apparently kids now think we're from the 1900s. Let us be clear, there are no bustles and petticoats going on here. No pop socks either, although Thom does have a story about how one of hers somehow ending up on another friend's leg, along with an eyelash and some road signs. It's a true story. Get stuck in.

We're both baffled by M&S and their new marketing campaign to capture the market, ours would fall straight through the gap! But good on you!

And speaking of M&S, Thom is not happy with them. If they don't bring back their Greek Yoghurt with Vanilla soon, she may go full Ann Robinson. Oh, wait, she's already done that. She can't help it, she's on keto and it's hot, it's a dangerous combination.

Dr Dunn has a fact for you, and she's still recovering from the shame of showing her pants to a 24-year-old on a job.

We get into some great telly, the people we're loving on Instagram, and the big questions: are we too old for - role play, and are we allowed to fancy Harry Styles?

Plus a little something on our wild swim. All four of us. watch out for the pics

Ears open, headphones on.

This week, Dunn is discovering the joys of dog ownership, and no, it's not all fetch and cuddles. It's flies. So many flies. There's even a dance involved.

Old Mrs Hackett does something absolutely diabolical in a supermarket car park. For the record, she is NOT a thief.

Then the big question: are we too old for this now and are we too old to pretend we like certain things? Take the tracksuit. There's no way on earth we're going back to a proper Scouse tracky, and forward rolls and cart wheels? Absolute agony. One word: carpal tunnel.

We're not here for tiny portions or cheap wine. Well, Dunn is. But that depends on the taste.

We're done with trending clothes and food fads, chicken anything that costs a wing and a leg, and deep-fried nonsense that costs a fortune. NO

We no longer run for a bus. And we absolutely refuse to be served food on a plank or a slate. It's a plate. It's always been a plate.

We get into the fine art of the full orgasm, it just needs a breather these days. We even share the trick. Here's a clue: give it five minutes in between.

We can't be friends with people who don't care about food. We've tried. We can't do it. We're both foodies, and that's a dealbreaker, sorry.

Sometimes you just want a dirty sausage sandwich. So we're asking, what's your perfect brekkie? Thom will tell you what she would do with a Richmond and a pigeon!

Dunn has found some magic pants that cool your foof down, the Clam Cooler 3000. pube snag! NO

Who else remembers Betterware magazines and all the useless tat your parents bought every single month?

And if you're older and you pull a Judgey McJudge Face, well, you have to expect a retort. It's not always the young ones lacking respect, funnily enough. It's really not.

Plus all the things we're currently watching, including a deep dive into Greek mythology - NO Ears at the ready