You know that moment when life drops something heavy in your lap and your brain does that “oh hell no” spiral?

The call you didn’t expect, the crisis you never planned for, the “oh my god, what do I even do next” moment?

In this episode, I sit down with my friend and total powerhouse Debra Woog, and we get brutally honest about what confidence looks like when everything is falling apart — not the Instagram version, the real-life, messy, human version.

Debra talks about the crisis that knocked her flat, the one that forced her to rebuild confidence from the ground up. And hearing her walk through it — calmly, clearly, and with that signature Debra groundedness — felt like someone turning on a light in a room I didn’t realize had gone dim. She doesn’t sugarcoat anything, and that’s what makes it so damn comforting.

We also get into that weird, almost guilty feeling of being “the strong one” even when you don’t feel strong. Debra lays out how she learned to ask for help (like, actually ask) and how that became the turning point for getting her confidence back. I swear, I felt this in my bones.

This conversation is the reminder every single one of us needs: confidence isn’t about being unshakeable. It's about remembering who you are while you're being shaken. Debra shows us exactly how to do that and with so much grace it’ll make you exhale in relief.

Highlights from our conversation:

• Why confidence during a crisis never looks the way we expect ( and why that’s actually a good thing)
• How to keep showing up for your life even when your energy, identity or sense of control feels wobbly
• Why asking for help is actually one of the strongest confidence moves you can make (and how Debra learned to do it)
• How to remind yourself who you are and what you can handle when life hits hard
• The simple daily practice Debra used to stop spiraling and start stabilizing

Connect2 Corporation founder and Principal Crisis Navigation Partner® Debra A. Woog (pronounced “Vogue”) has 30+ years of experience as a leadership researcher, executive, and advisor. Debra empowers highly competent women facing challenging circumstances with the expertise, empathy, and structure to connect with the right resources, communicate effectively, and lead with a clear mind and a solid strategy. Learn more about Debra at connectwo.com.

You know those days when you look around and suddenly realize, “Wait… I earned all this”? That’s the vibe of this episode. I’m sitting here, sipping something strong, telling you the truth we forget way too often: the confidence we’re walking around with didn’t fall from the sky. All those skills, talents, relationships, even the weird little wins? We built them. And when you start seeing your life through that lens… oh, everything shifts. Opportunities don’t just magically appear — you finally notice them.

What really struck me as I recorded this is how easy it is to sleepwalk through our own success. We miss the good stuff, the right people, the “doors” we were absolutely meant to walk through, simply because we’re rushing or doubting or distracted. But when you get intentional about it, suddenly people become more interesting, and you become more interesting right back. It's wild how quickly that builds confidence on both sides.

I also tell you about this little end-of-day ritual I swear by: finding the small wins. Not gratitude — that’s great, but it can feel like everything just happened to you. This is different. This is claiming the moments where you actually moved something forward. And yes, sometimes that “small win” is someone making your day. Other times, it’s you making theirs. A text. A compliment. A pot of soup. A connection email. A tiny spark of humanity that lands exactly right for someone.

That’s where your superpower lives — in how you lift someone else up. The deeper stuff counts the most: thanking the role models you never properly acknowledged, circling back to the friend who showed up when you didn’t even ask, telling the people in your life that they mattered in ways they might not even realize. Identifying these isn’t a to-do and there’s no pressure. It’s just the simplest daily boost you can give yourself and the world.

If you’ve been feeling stuck or doubting whether you’re really “doing enough,” this episode is your permission slip to look again — really look — at what you’ve earned, what you’ve created and the confidence you can give away just by showing up with a little more intention. Pour your favorite drink, take a breath, and join me for this one. It hits exactly where it needs to.

Okay, grab your wine, your tea, your snack — whatever makes you cozy — because you are NOT ready for the story Jeff Luther is about to tell. This guy survived literal near-death, like “heart stopped, flatlined, dead for eight minutes” kind of near-death. And somehow, instead of coming out bitter or broken, he came out with a superpower: a brand-new perspective on confidence, vulnerability, and connection.

We’re talking about a man who went from running 50Ks and feeling unstoppable to being told, “Hey buddy, your heart’s dangerous. Don’t move too much or you could die.” And yes, that’s terrifying. But Jeff didn’t just survive physically — he came out thinking, feeling, and acting differently in ways that any of us can learn from, even if our worst day doesn’t involve flatlining.

What I loved about Jeff is how real he is about fear and vulnerability. He had to confront what he was afraid to face — not just for himself but for his teenage son, who witnessed parts of this. Jeff’s story is raw, human, and honestly, a little scary, but it’s full of nuggets about how confidence isn’t just a skill, it’s a survival tool.

Confidence isn’t the result of something dramatic happening. Jeff will be the first to tell you that it’s a choice (sound familiar?). This conversation may be heavy in some places, but it’s also hopeful because Jeff proves that even small shifts in our mindset and also showing up for others — vulnerably, genuinely — actually builds your confidence in ways you don’t expect.

Key takeaways from our conversation include:

• How leaning into honesty with yourself and others builds real, resilient confidence.
• The ways gratitude literally rewires your brain.
• What it means to connect when life is hard. Whether it’s a near-death moment or just a tough conversation with your teen, showing up fully strengthens your confidence and relationships simultaneously.
• How to flip fear into agency.
• The role mindset plays in shaping recovery and growth.

Jeff Luther is a seasoned entrepreneur and fitness enthusiast who has overcome significant health challenges, including a life-threatening heart condition. With over 25 years of experience in business and a passion for inspiring others, Jeff utilizes his journey to motivate individuals facing their own adversities. He shares valuable insights on resilience, gratitude, and the importance of human connection. You can learn more about Jeff Luther at jeffluther.com.