In this quick Thanksgiving episode, Tammy J. Bond challenges the notion that gratitude is just a holiday tradition—it's a leadership strategy. She shares that leaders often get stuck in a "scarcity loop," focusing only on what is not working yet. This episode provides four quick points to help leaders shift their perspective from lack to presence, turning gratitude into a proactive force that expands positive outcomes and boosts team performance.

• The Scarcity Loop: Leaders commonly focus on the "yet's" (what they don't have yet, who's not performing yet), leading to a perception of lack. This scarcity loop expands what you don't want to see.

• Flip Your Focus: Flip the script by focusing on the "yet." Acknowledge the positive basics (e.g., "I'm grateful Frank shows up on time every day") and then shift to what you want next. What you focus on expands.

• Shift from Missing to Present: Do not focus your attention on what's missing. Shift your thinking to what is present and what you do have. This perspective shift attracts more of the positive into your field of vision.

• Gratitude as a Strategy, Not a Tradition: Gratitude should be a constant practice. When you focus on the positive around you, you can even find a "best gift attribute" in an underperformer, simply by shifting your attention from what is frustrating to what is present.

Before the holiday distractions take over, pause for 30 seconds and ask yourself this powerful question:

"What is here that I have been too busy [distracted] to appreciate?"

Take time to breathe in gratitude—not resentment, frustration, or fear. Always remember, leadership isn't something we're born with, it's something that we grow into.

Happy Thanksgiving! Remember that gratitude is a leadership strategy. What are you focusing on today, leader?

Passive aggression is the emotional sabotage dressed as politeness that is silently draining your team's energy and trust. Tammy J. Bond pulls back the curtain on this pervasive workplace toxicity, revealing that leaders who ignore it aren't keeping the peace—they're preserving the problem. With over 50% of employees reporting being targeted by passive aggression, this episode provides direct, no-fluff strategies for leaders and middle managers to confront this "camouflaged conflict" and restore health to their teams.

• The High Cost of Avoidance: Passive aggression is leadership quicksand. Over half your team may be spending mental energy decoding tone and mannerisms instead of focusing on their jobs.

• The Source of Passive Aggression: It's not about conflict; it's about control. Passive aggressive individuals avoid direct confrontation but use sarcasm, silence, or "forgetfulness" to pull strings and be the master puppeteer.

• The Leadership Leak: Passive aggression is cowardly communication in leadership's clothing.Ignoring it rewards avoidance and reinforces the toxic pattern. Leaders must stop rescuing people from discomfort and start coaching them through it.

• Coaching vs. Dictating: Workplace coaching is not the "point, shoot, and tell" style. True coaching is being curious, asking questions, and evoking answers that help people up-level themselves.

• Directness is Respect: If you are serious about creating a sandbox where adults talk to one another, you must teach the team that healthy directness is respect, not rudeness.

You don't tiptoe through the tulips; you call the behavior what it is.

1. Name It and Claim It: Do not over-explain or accuse. Simply name the specific behavior you observe and tie it back to a core value.
   Example: "I'm noticing sarcasm when we talk about deadlines. Help me understand what's really going on, because sarcasm is not one of our espoused values."

2. Model Clarity and Accountability: Use the clear, simple framework of the SBI+E Model (Situation, Behavior, Impact, and Expectation) for a straightforward, behavioral conversation.

3. Set the Boundary and Hold It: The only way to stop the "leak" is to confront it. Document it, discuss it, and model how to clean up the conflict.

If your leader is the passive-aggressive player, don't accuse them directly. Bring the clarity back to them:

1. Expose the Behavior, Not the Person: Present the situation and the unaligned behavior you've noticed on the team.

2. Ask for Their Strategy: Ask the leader, "How would you go about approaching these behaviors when they have the impact that's causing others to shut down?"

3. Gain the Framework: Let the passive-aggressive leader give you the expectation and solution, then use that framework to present the required behavioral changes.

The next time a coworker drops an "I'm just kidding" that lands like a knife, don't laugh it off. Push pause, take a breath, and ask your next best question. Leadership is about keeping everyone accountable.

Tammy J. Bond fires up the microphone for women leaders, challenging the pervasive habit of over-apologizing in professional settings. She argues that frequently defaulting to phrases like "I'm sorry, but..." or "This might not be the right time, but..." causes your apologies to show up louder than your actual leadership, draining your credibility and inviting doubt. This episode confronts the conditioning that leads women to wait to be invited instead of owning the room and provides a power move to replace apologies with confident, conscious confrontation.

• The Apology Drain: Unnecessary apologies soften your voice and teach the room to doubt you, reducing your credibility right before your "mic drop moment."

• The Real Reason Women Apologize More: Studies show both men and women apologize about 81% of the time when they agree something is an offense. However, women judge more situations as apology-worthy because of their heightened emotional awareness and ability to read the room. Apologizing is a sign of noticing, not a sign of weakness.

• The Cost of Over-Apologizing: You are donating your credibility and putting doubt in place of confidence with your team.

• The Power Move: Leadership presence means stepping in, being willing to confront—consciously, contagiously, and confidently—without apology.

• Owning the Room: Men walk in and own the room; women often sit back and wait to be invited. It's time to own your voice and your space.

Stop apologizing for being direct, confident, bold, or clear. Save your "sorry's" for real harm you've caused.

1. Replace the Apology: Instead of starting with "I'm sorry, but..." or "I know we're almost out of time, but...," reframe your statement to be clear and convicted.

   • Old: "I'm sorry to interrupt, but I have a question about the budget."

   • New: "Hold a minute. I want to bring up something about the budget before we run out of time."

2. Acknowledge, Don't Apologize (for stepping on toes): If you suspect you were overly direct, acknowledge the potential impact, but do not apologize for your assertiveness.

   • Statement: "I acknowledge that was very bold. Let's talk about how you feel about that."

   • Goal: You thank them for bringing it to your attention and ask how to make it different next time, ensuring you are not apologizing for being bold.

Ladies, stop apologizing. Start leading with conviction, confidence, clarity, and connection to the purpose of your conversation. Who are you not to?