The holidays often come with unspoken expectations to overgive, overexplain, and override our own needs. In this episode, I introduce the concept of a Holiday Bill of Rights: compassionate reminder of what we are allowed to honor during a season that can easily pull us back into old roles and patterns. Rather than focusing on "doing more self-care," this episode centers on self-loyalty, emotional honesty, and boundaries that protect our nervous system, energy, and well-being. If the holidays tend to stir guilt, grief, or pressure to perform, this conversation offers language, permission, and relief.

Three Key Takeaways

1. Boundaries are not about control, they're about self-respect.
Honoring your limits doesn't require agreement or approval from others. Feeling guilt doesn't mean you're doing something wrong; it often means you're doing something different.

2. You're allowed to stop abandoning yourself for the sake of tradition.
Just because something has always been done a certain way doesn't mean it still fits. Growth often requires renegotiating expectations, especially during the holidays.

3. Your nervous system matters more than appearances.
Emotional safety, rest, and clarity are not luxuries. When you listen to your body and honor your needs, you create a more grounded and authentic holiday experience.

Tradition

should create connection,

not obligation.

If it costs you your peace,

you're allowed to opt out.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

In this episode, we're continuing our holiday self-care series with one essential truth: real peace begins when we're honest about what we can actually handle. The holidays tend to pull us back into old roles and emotional patterns, leaving us overwhelmed, overextended, and disconnected from ourselves before we even realize it.
Today, we explore why this happens, how to recognize the subtle moments of self-abandonment, and what it looks like to care for yourself from a place of truth instead of pressure or performance.

Three Takeaways

1. You'll learn the surprising reason holiday stress often has less to do with events and more to do with old emotional patterns we slip into without noticing.

2. We'll talk about how to identify the quiet, subtle moments where you start abandoning yourself… and what a small shift toward honesty can do for your peace.

3. You'll walk away with simple, practical questions that help you stay grounded, connected, and true to yourself no matter what the season brings.

You can't set a healthy boundary

if you aren't willing to

tell yourself the truth first.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

This week, we're pulling a good one from the vault…

Welcome to Episode 191 where we dig into how real self-care means following through on what we need to do to take care of ourselves.

In this episode we dive deeper into the idea that TRUE self-care is when we make it real. When we follow through on both holding the line on our boundaries and taking responsibility for what we have promised ourselves we would take care of. Self-care involves following through with actions that nourish your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. We talked last week about some of the good things and not so good things to have in our life. If you haven't had a chance to listen to that yet you might want to do that first…and come join us back here when you're done so this episode will make more sense.

When you commit to taking care of yourself, it means setting boundaries, saying no to things that drain you, prioritizing rest and relaxation, and making time for activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Following through with these actions not only benefits your own well-being, but also supports your ability to be assertive and advocate for yourself in all areas of your life.

Key Elements:

· Explore the some of the consequences of not following through on self-care

· Identify how taking care of ourselves is the best way to feel more confident.

· Identify ways to make it easier to commit and follow through.

You don't have to

prove anything

this holiday season –

not your worth,

not your patience,

not your strength.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

This week, we're looking at how our families shaped the way we think about boundaries and why holiday gatherings like Thanksgiving tend to reactivate old roles and survival strategies.

This episode explores how to show up differently this Thanksgiving — grounded, prepared, and centered — instead of slipping back into the versions of ourselves we've outgrown. You'll learn how to notice old triggers before you walk in the door, create invisible boundaries that protect your energy, plan resets and exit strategies without guilt, and stay connected to the adult version of you instead of the child who learned to self-abandon. This is about creating safety inside yourself so you no longer trade your peace for approval.

Three Things to Think About:

1. Why family gatherings often reactivate old roles — and how to stay anchored in the adult you are now, not the child you used to be.

2. How to prepare your nervous system before you arrive so you can stay present, grounded, and connected to yourself throughout the day.

3. Simple ways to protect your peace quietly and confidently even when others have big emotions, expectations, or reactions.

The adult you are today

gets to make choices

the child version of you

never had.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

Boundaries aren't just about saying no - they're about finally seeing clearly. In this episode, I break down how boundary work forces us out of fantasy and into reality, and why this shift brings up grief, sadness, and confusion before it brings peace. We explore what detachment actually means (loving without carrying), why acceptance always asks us to grieve the illusions we've held onto, and how seeing the truth opens the path to emotional freedom, self-respect, and grounded decision-making.

Three Things to Think About:

1. Why clarity feels uncomfortable before it feels freeing — and how boundaries shift you from potential to reality in ways you may not expect.

2. What healthy detachment really looks like — and why it's not distance, coldness, or giving up, but something far more grounded and compassionate.

3. How grief and acceptance quietly shape boundary work — and how these emotions help you stop carrying what was never yours to hold.

Sometimes the hardest goodbye

is to the version of someone

you hoped they'd be.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

When you start communicating with boundaries, the tone of every relationship begins to change — sometimes in ways that surprise you. In this episode, Mary Baker breaks down what it really means to speak from emotional honesty and detachment, and why this combination completely shifts the emotional climate at home, at work, and in your friendships. You'll learn how calm, grounded communication builds trust and respect while reducing drama and confusion.

But this kind of growth doesn't always feel peaceful at first. Mary walks listeners through what happens when you stop rescuing, overexplaining, and cushioning your truth — and how to stay steady when others aren't used to your new clarity. If you've ever wondered why honesty and boundaries go hand in hand, this episode will help you find your footing and your voice.

Three Takeaways

1. Grounded truth changes the room. When you communicate from honesty instead of fear, people can feel the difference — and so can you.

2. Discomfort doesn't mean you're wrong. Early tension often signals the system adjusting to your new clarity, not a mistake on your part.

3. Calm is the new power. You can speak directly and stay kind without rescuing, fixing, or losing yourself in the process.

When you learn to

communicate from truth,

not fear,

everything changes.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

Boundary work sounds empowering — and it is — but no one tells you how strange it feels at first. When you begin honoring your limits, your nervous system doesn't throw a party; it throws a fit. In this episode, we unpack why your body equates "familiar" with "safe," even when familiar has meant people-pleasing, over-giving, or pretending you're fine. You'll learn why this discomfort doesn't mean you're doing something wrong — it means you're finally doing something different.

We'll also explore the family patterns that made boundaries feel like betrayal, and how learning to stay with that unease is how we begin to rewire safety from the inside out. This conversation isn't about blame — it's about awareness, compassion, and learning to calm your body while you practice a new kind of self-loyalty.

Three Takeaways

1. The body often mistakes self-abandonment for safety — until we teach it something new.

2. Boundaries may feel "wrong" at first because they disrupt old emotional rules.

3. Learning to stay with the discomfort is how real confidence and self-trust begin to grow.

Vulnerability isn't exposure;

it's invitation. It's saying,

'This is who I am —

can you meet me here?'

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour

Feeling stuck doesn't mean you're unmotivated — it usually means you don't feel safe enough to move. Fear, shame, and self-doubt can quietly trap us in loops of overthinking, avoidance, and perfectionism, especially when past experiences have taught our bodies that taking risks isn't safe. In this episode, Mary explores why fear often feels stronger than logic, how trauma trains us to freeze, and what it actually takes to begin moving again.

You'll learn how to create safety before action, why supportive relationships are essential for unfreezing, and how micro-steps — not big leaps — build lasting courage. This episode is for anyone who's tired of being stuck but too scared to push forward alone. You'll walk away understanding that healing isn't about forcing yourself to "just do it" — it's about learning to trust your body, your timing, and the safe people who can help you move again.

Three Takeaways

1. Fear and paralysis are signs of an unsafe nervous system — not a lack of willpower.

2. You can't move forward until you feel safe enough to — safety is the foundation for courage.

3. Real change happens when safety meets support, one small step at a time.

Healing begins the moment

we let someone see

the parts we've been hiding —

and discover we're still safe.

Get your FREE Boundaries Ebook here!

If you're ready to find your voice, set healthy boundaries, and create more fulfilling relationships, this guide is your roadmap!

Need more? Check out the Masterclass on Reclaiming Your Voice:

https://www.findyourvoicecourse.com/beyond-words

Hey! My signature course is live! I am so excited to also offer a free upgrade to the group coaching program. Be sure to click here to check it out:

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/

Need coaching? Sign up here for your Power Hour, where you and I can get you started on your confidence journey!

https://findyourvoicecourse.com/power-hour