We have talked about relationships to ourselves, our families, community, sex, and romance. And we saved the most loaded topic for last: money.

In this final full episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns, Renae sits down with Patrick Armano-Amato, CRPC, AWMA, Financial Advisor with Merrill Lynch, for a conversation that is equal parts practical and deeply personal. Because for LGBTQ+ folks, money has never been just about money.

They get into the history that explains why so many queer people never learned to plan for a future, how internalized shame shows up in spending, saving, and avoidance, the very real financial cost of being queer when it comes to family building and legal protection, what couples can do right now to safeguard their financial rights as marriage equality faces new threats, and what a healthy, values-aligned relationship with your money can actually look like.

This one is grounded, honest, and genuinely useful. Whether you are partnered, single, building a family, or just trying to figure out where to start, this conversation is for you.

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Gabriella Layne Her/Hers @strutsocialwithgabby

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Casi Schwisow She/They

Guest Bio :

Patrick Armano-Amato, CRPC™, AWMA™, is a Financial Advisor with Merrill Lynch in Los Angeles who is dedicated to helping LGBTQ+ individuals, couples, families, and community leaders navigate life’s financial decisions with confidence. His practice focuses on creating personalized financial investment strategies that reflect each client’s unique goals, relationships, and definition of family.

Beyond his advisory work, Patrick is deeply involved in the LGBTQ+ community. He serves as Vice President and Board Member of the Los Angeles LGBTQ Chamber of Commerce, is a member of the Board of Advisors for APAIT, and serves as Vice Chair of the LA Pride Business Council at Bank of America. Through his professional and volunteer work, he is passionate about expanding financial education and helping people build lasting financial security while supporting the communities they care about.

IG: oliveb0y

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-armano-amato/

Email: patrick.armano-amato@ml.com

Website: https://advisor.ml.com/sites/ca/century-city-ca/patrick.armano-amato

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson, LPCC, ATR-BC (they/them) is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board-Certified Art Therapist, and the Founder of Open Space Therapy Collective, a group practice offering affirming, social justice-driven mental health care for the LGBTQ+ & QTPOC community. With clinical expertise in complex trauma, identity development, and creative expression, Renae blends therapeutic depth with a commitment to equity and inclusion.

In addition to their clinical work, Renae produces community wellness events like Queerly Connected and is a founding board member of the LA Queer Coalition, creating spaces where queer and trans people can gather, heal, organize, and celebrate.

As a speaker, consultant, and activist, Renae is passionate about building systems of care that honor the full humanity of queer and trans individuals—and equipping healthcare and wellness providers with the tools to do the same.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

You have done the work of figuring out who you are. But have you done the work of figuring out what you actually want?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC Clinical Director Kristen Crowe (they/them) sits down with queer somatic sex and relationship therapist Anna Mayer (she/her) to talk about what it really means to queer your sex life and your relationships. Not in the sense of following a new script, but in the sense of questioning every script you were handed and building something that actually fits.

They get into embodied consent, the difference between uncomfortable and unsafe, why so many of us are still following rules we never agreed to, and how your body has been trying to give you information this whole time. They also talk about where to start when you genuinely do not know what you want, and why that is a completely valid place to be.

This one is honest, practical, and genuinely liberating.

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Cejae Escudero She/Her @zzjaescudero

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Sam Weller He/Him @yeahsamweller

Guest Bio :

Anna Mayer, MA, LPC, R-DMT (she/her) is a queer somatic sex therapist and relationship counselor based near Boulder, Colorado. She uses embodiment, humor, a liberatory mindset, and practical tools to empower anyone who feels cut off from their pleasure and passion. She especially loves working with queer folks, recovering people-pleasers, couples, and polycules. At its core, her work centers around helping people connect more deeply to themselves – body, mind, heart, and spirit – and move through anything that is keeping them from expressing their genuine desires and embodying their most vibrant life.

Website: http://www.annamayercounseling.com

Instagram: @every.body.loves.counseling

Host Bio:

Kristen Crowe (they/them), BC-DMT, LPCC, CST, is the Clinical Director of Open Space Therapy Collective, a LGBTQIA+ group practice rooted in community and care in Los Angeles. A somatic therapist and certified sex therapist, Kristen works with individuals and people in relationship, and provides clinical supervision to junior therapists through an affirming, anti-oppressive, and anti-racist lens. They bring that same embodied, justice-forward approach to the classroom as an adjunct professor in the Expressive Arts Therapy program at California Institute of Integral Studies.

Outside the therapy room, Kristen is the founder of Soul on Fire Dance, a queer-friendly adult dance studio built on the belief that movement, inclusivity, and community are acts of liberation. Whether in session, the classroom, or on the dance floor, Kristen is deeply invested in helping people come home to themselves.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, embodied consent, pleasure, sexuality, relationship therapy, self-discovery, LGBTQ+

We talk a lot about romantic relationships in queer spaces. But what about everything else?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapists Kristen Crowe, LPCC, BC-DMT (they/them) and Raven Juergensen, APCC, ATR-BC (she/her) get into the queer social friendscape: what it actually takes to build meaningful friendships, why it's so much harder than anyone prepares you for, and what gets in the way for so many of us.

They dig into the pressure to make one person be everything, how cishet norms around friendship leave queer folks without a roadmap, what it means to find community when you've spent years masking, and how to start trusting your own nervous system to tell you who your people are.

This one is personal, practical, and deeply relatable. Especially if you've ever Googled how to make queer friends and meant it.

Sound Bites

"We need to let ourselves be nourished by each other in ways that aren't inherently romantic"

"No one teaches you how to have healthy friendships, you're just kind of thrown in the deep end"

"That's so much to put on one person"

"To share yourself with others, you have to know who you are first"

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Sig Levin She/Her @twinhighmaintenancemachines

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Joselyn Romero They Them @josyfeocy

Hosts’ Bio:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT, CST (they/them) Is Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board Certified Dance/Movement Therapist, Certified Sex Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Raven Juergensen, APCC, ATR (she/her) is an Associate Professional Clinical Counselor and Registered Art Therapist. Raven works with teens, couples, and adults, drawing on creativity and geek culture to help clients process their internal experience and bring intuitive creativity into daily life.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer friendship, chosen family, community building, social isolation, attachment styles, cishet norms, decentering romance, queer social life, authentic self, code switching, nervous system, body awareness, ACT therapy, late bloomer, masking, intersectionality, mixed relationships, secure attachment, queer community, boundaries, communication, values, intuition, social landscape

The word "toxic" is everywhere. But what does it actually mean, and when does throwing it around start to work against us?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapists Allison Smith, LCSW (she/they) and Ernesto Martinez, AMFT, APCC (he/they) get into the real definition: not just what's present in a harmful relationship, but what's missing. They break down the difference between genuine power and control dynamics and the everyday friction that comes with being in relationship with other humans. They talk about gaslighting, love bombing, isolation, and the ways that queer folks navigate all of this inside systems that were never designed to protect them.

This one goes deep, and it goes there with care.

Join us for the second episode in our Queer Hearts Health Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns series.

Sound Bites:

"Confusion and inconsistency are really potent things that make us very driven and attached"

"To acknowledge something doesn't mean to endorse it"

"The person who loves me also hurts me"

"It's not just what is present, it's also what is missing"

"What was I left carrying that isn't mine"

"Our relationship with our government is an abusive relationship"

"We start in this world of secrecy and isolation"

"We're social creatures, we're made to be in a village"

"Try to invest in your friendships and your communities"

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Asia Brooks - She/Her - @samuraiasia

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Madi - She/Her - @clicksbymadi

Hosts Bio:

Allison Smith LCSW (she/they) is a Licensed Therapist at Open Space Therapy Collective. Allison specializes in integrating trauma-informed, abolitionist frameworks to support clients in exploring identity, relationships, and cultural connections.

Ernesto Martinez APCC, AMFT (they/elle/he/el) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Ernesto specializes in working with Adults, Teens, & Parents of Gender Expansive Children, Adult Children of (im)Migrants to transform challenges into stepping stones towards self-compassion, fulfillment, and confidence.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, toxic relationships, intimate partner violence, power and control, emotional codependence, minority stress, attachment, gaslighting, love bombing, isolation, intergenerational trauma, healthy love, community care, LGBTQ+ relationships, heterocentric norms, systemic oppression, nervous system, repair, incompatibility, chosen family

Welcome to the series Queer Hearts Healthy Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns!

Queer people know how to love hard. We also know how to stay too long, give too much, and call it devotion. In this intro episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapist Terra Friedman, AMFT, opens the conversation we actually need to have — what makes a relationship toxic, where those patterns come from, and why queer folks carry more than most.

Terra breaks down the definition of toxic relationships (hint: it's about power and emotional codependence, not just bad vibes), traces the historical and systemic forces that shape how we love, and takes on the myths that paint queer relationships as inherently unstable or uniquely evolved. Spoiler: neither is true, and both do damage.

This one's the foundation. Tune in so the rest of the series lands the way it should.

Sound Bites

"Toxic relationships are based in power and emotional codependence"

"Systemic models of health are rooted in white, hetero, binary norms"

"Trauma and systemic stress influence relationship patterns"

Mentioned in this Episode: Evelyn Hooker - The Adjustment of the Male Overt Homosexual

My Therapist is Out! Can You Have Healthy Relationships If You Only Saw Toxic Ones

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Fox Woods He/They @fox_kendall_woods

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Bex She/Her @bexbourgeois

Host Bio : Terra Friedman AFMT (she/her) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Terra specializes in working with high achieving womxn who experience anxiety. Terra also works with couples and partners who are currently in or exploring non-monogamous relationships.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, toxic relationships, mental health, community connection, systemic prejudice, healthy love, attachment, LGBTQ history

In Part One of this listener Q&A, hosts and therapists Renae Johnson (they/them) and Kristen Crowe (they/them) respond to questions from the My Therapist Is Out! community about identity-based harm and what it actually feels like to live inside it. Together, they unpack why so many queer and marginalized folks feel chronically exhausted, disconnected, or unsure whether what they’re carrying “counts” as trauma.

Renae and Kristen explore how identity-based harm shows up in the body, in relationships, and in community spaces — especially when those spaces don’t feel as safe or healing as we hoped. They talk about the tension between wanting connection and needing protection, how to support immigrant and targeted communities without centering ourselves, and what community care can look like when we’re already stretched thin. This episode offers validation, clarity, and permission to name what’s happening — without needing to have all the answers yet.

Takeaways

The conversation highlights the exhaustion felt by queer individuals in today's society.

Understanding the difference between personal trauma and collective trauma is crucial.

Community care plays a vital role in healing from identity-based harm.

Emotional responses can be complex and intertwined with societal issues.

It's important to recognize the impact of social media on our emotional well-being.

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Charlie Montiel He/They @charlieboytattoo

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Rae Hamilton-Vargo They/Them @rae_hv

Host Bios:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT (they/them) Is Licensed Therapist, Dance Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Renae Johnson, LPCC, ATR-BC (they/them) is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board-Certified Art Therapist, and the Founder of Open Space Therapy Collective, a group practice offering affirming, social justice-driven mental health care for the LGBTQ+ & QTPOC community.

In addition to their clinical work, Renae produces community wellness events like Queerly Connected and is a founding member of the LA Queer Coalition, creating spaces where queer and trans people can gather, heal, organize, and celebrate.

As a speaker, consultant, and activist, Renae is passionate about building systems of care that honor the full humanity of queer and trans individuals—and equipping healthcare and wellness providers with the tools to do the same.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: LGBTQ+ mental health podcast, identity-based harm, queer trauma and healing, community care in LGBTQ+ spaces, hate-based trauma recovery, radical healing for marginalized communities, queer therapists podcast, LGBTQ+ collective healing, trauma-informed community care, storytelling as healing in queer communities