We talk a lot about romantic relationships in queer spaces. But what about everything else?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapists Kristen Crowe, LPCC, BC-DMT (they/them) and Raven Juergensen, APCC, ATR-BC (she/her) get into the queer social friendscape: what it actually takes to build meaningful friendships, why it's so much harder than anyone prepares you for, and what gets in the way for so many of us.

They dig into the pressure to make one person be everything, how cishet norms around friendship leave queer folks without a roadmap, what it means to find community when you've spent years masking, and how to start trusting your own nervous system to tell you who your people are.

This one is personal, practical, and deeply relatable. Especially if you've ever Googled how to make queer friends and meant it.

Sound Bites

"We need to let ourselves be nourished by each other in ways that aren't inherently romantic"

"No one teaches you how to have healthy friendships, you're just kind of thrown in the deep end"

"That's so much to put on one person"

"To share yourself with others, you have to know who you are first"

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Sig Levin She/Her @twinhighmaintenancemachines

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Joselyn Romero They Them @josyfeocy

Hosts’ Bio:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT, CST (they/them) Is Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board Certified Dance/Movement Therapist, Certified Sex Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Raven Juergensen, APCC, ATR (she/her) is an Associate Professional Clinical Counselor and Registered Art Therapist. Raven works with teens, couples, and adults, drawing on creativity and geek culture to help clients process their internal experience and bring intuitive creativity into daily life.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer friendship, chosen family, community building, social isolation, attachment styles, cishet norms, decentering romance, queer social life, authentic self, code switching, nervous system, body awareness, ACT therapy, late bloomer, masking, intersectionality, mixed relationships, secure attachment, queer community, boundaries, communication, values, intuition, social landscape

The word "toxic" is everywhere. But what does it actually mean, and when does throwing it around start to work against us?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapists Allison Smith, LCSW (she/they) and Ernesto Martinez, AMFT, APCC (he/they) get into the real definition: not just what's present in a harmful relationship, but what's missing. They break down the difference between genuine power and control dynamics and the everyday friction that comes with being in relationship with other humans. They talk about gaslighting, love bombing, isolation, and the ways that queer folks navigate all of this inside systems that were never designed to protect them.

This one goes deep, and it goes there with care.

Join us for the second episode in our Queer Hearts Health Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns series.

Sound Bites:

"Confusion and inconsistency are really potent things that make us very driven and attached"

"To acknowledge something doesn't mean to endorse it"

"The person who loves me also hurts me"

"It's not just what is present, it's also what is missing"

"What was I left carrying that isn't mine"

"Our relationship with our government is an abusive relationship"

"We start in this world of secrecy and isolation"

"We're social creatures, we're made to be in a village"

"Try to invest in your friendships and your communities"

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Asia Brooks - She/Her - @samuraiasia

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Madi - She/Her - @clicksbymadi

Hosts Bio:

Allison Smith LCSW (she/they) is a Licensed Therapist at Open Space Therapy Collective. Allison specializes in integrating trauma-informed, abolitionist frameworks to support clients in exploring identity, relationships, and cultural connections.

Ernesto Martinez APCC, AMFT (they/elle/he/el) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Ernesto specializes in working with Adults, Teens, & Parents of Gender Expansive Children, Adult Children of (im)Migrants to transform challenges into stepping stones towards self-compassion, fulfillment, and confidence.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, toxic relationships, intimate partner violence, power and control, emotional codependence, minority stress, attachment, gaslighting, love bombing, isolation, intergenerational trauma, healthy love, community care, LGBTQ+ relationships, heterocentric norms, systemic oppression, nervous system, repair, incompatibility, chosen family

Welcome to the series Queer Hearts Healthy Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns!

Queer people know how to love hard. We also know how to stay too long, give too much, and call it devotion. In this intro episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapist Terra Friedman, AMFT, opens the conversation we actually need to have — what makes a relationship toxic, where those patterns come from, and why queer folks carry more than most.

Terra breaks down the definition of toxic relationships (hint: it's about power and emotional codependence, not just bad vibes), traces the historical and systemic forces that shape how we love, and takes on the myths that paint queer relationships as inherently unstable or uniquely evolved. Spoiler: neither is true, and both do damage.

This one's the foundation. Tune in so the rest of the series lands the way it should.

Sound Bites

"Toxic relationships are based in power and emotional codependence"

"Systemic models of health are rooted in white, hetero, binary norms"

"Trauma and systemic stress influence relationship patterns"

Mentioned in this Episode: Evelyn Hooker - The Adjustment of the Male Overt Homosexual

My Therapist is Out! Can You Have Healthy Relationships If You Only Saw Toxic Ones

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Fox Woods He/They @fox_kendall_woods

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Bex She/Her @bexbourgeois

Host Bio : Terra Friedman AFMT (she/her) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Terra specializes in working with high achieving womxn who experience anxiety. Terra also works with couples and partners who are currently in or exploring non-monogamous relationships.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, toxic relationships, mental health, community connection, systemic prejudice, healthy love, attachment, LGBTQ history