Vulnerability is the heartbeat of intimacy—but it’s not easy. In this episode of Marriage IQ, Drs. Heidi and Scott Hastings explore how secrecy and the need to appear perfect sabotage connection, while real openness creates space for growth and trust.

From joyful moments to painful transitions, we dive into how vulnerability shows up, how gender shapes our experience of it, and why support and discomfort are both part of the process.

Learn how to:

• Spot the hidden killers of vulnerability

• Support your spouse (and yourself) through raw moments

• Build a marriage where both partners feel safe being real

Because the strongest marriages aren’t perfect—they’re honest.

YOUTUBE: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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In this powerful episode of Marriage iQ, we explore why vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s the hidden superpower behind thriving marriages. When couples learn to open up emotionally, admit mistakes, and express needs without fear, they lay the groundwork for trust, connection, and lasting intimacy.

We dive into:

• Why vulnerability matters more than ever in modern marriage

• How the “shame hangover” keeps us from opening up—and how to push past it

• The different ways men and women experience vulnerability

• Five practical ways to build a more open, emotionally safe relationship

• We also explore a powerful metaphor: vulnerability as a vaccine—small doses of openness that strengthen your marriage against future challenges.

Whether you're newlyweds or decades in, this episode offers practical tools and real insight for creating a deeper, more connected relationship. Because the strongest marriages aren’t built on perfection—they’re built on courage, honesty, and showing up fully.

YOUTUBE: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠⁠⁠⁠

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠⁠⁠⁠

WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

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Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/marriage.iq/⁠⁠⁠⁠

Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/p/Marriage-IQ-61558652547411/⁠

In this powerful episode of Marriage iQ, we explore why vulnerability isn’t weakness—it’s the hidden superpower behind thriving marriages. When couples learn to open up emotionally, admit mistakes, and express needs without fear, they lay the groundwork for trust, connection, and lasting intimacy.

We dive into:

• Why vulnerability matters more than ever in modern marriage

• How the “shame hangover” keeps us from opening up—and how to push past it

• The different ways men and women experience vulnerability

• Five practical ways to build a more open, emotionally safe relationship

• We also explore a powerful metaphor: vulnerability as a vaccine—small doses of openness that strengthen your marriage against future challenges.

Whether you're newlyweds or decades in, this episode offers practical tools and real insight for creating a deeper, more connected relationship. Because the strongest marriages aren’t built on perfection—they’re built on courage, honesty, and showing up fully.

YOUTUBE: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠⁠⁠

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠⁠⁠

WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠⁠⁠⁠

SOCIAL MEDIA

Instagram: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/marriage.iq/⁠⁠⁠

Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/p/Marriage-IQ-61558652547411/⁠

Building self-trust starts with overcoming the limiting beliefs that hold us back from embracing our true selves.

In this episode of Marriage IQ, clinical psychologist and relationship coach Dr. Ray Doktor shares his inspiring journey of resilience—rising above childhood challenges like severe asthma, isolation, and experiences of racism—with the help of strong parental support.

Dr. Doktor offers a powerful reframe on trauma, explaining how it’s not the events themselves but how we process and integrate them that shapes our identity. He guides listeners through the process of identifying and overcoming limiting beliefs—often passed down through family, culture, and society—that undermine our self-trust and sense of worth.

Learn practical, actionable steps to challenge these beliefs, cultivate self-compassion, and rebuild your inner foundation. Strengthening self-trust not only boosts your self-esteem but also transforms your relationships by improving communication, boundaries, and decision-making.

As Dr. Doktor wisely reminds us, “Just be you. We all have a story, and just hopefully that story you have is more loving about yourself.”

YOUTUBE: ⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠⁠⁠

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠⁠⁠

WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠⁠⁠

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In this heartfelt and down-to-earth episode of Marriage IQ Real Talk, Scott and Heidi Hastings open up about the identity shifts that naturally occur over the course of a marriage—and how those changes can either bring couples closer or slowly create distance.

Drawing from their own journey through parenthood, career changes, and personal growth, Scott and Heidi offer a vulnerable look at how evolving roles, beliefs, and passions can reshape a marriage—for better or for worse.

🎧 In this episode, we explore:

• How major life transitions—like becoming parents, changing careers, or exploring new beliefs—can impact your identity

• Why curiosity and emotional safety are essential when your spouse is changing

• What to do when fear or disconnection starts creeping in

• A simple but powerful practice: identity affirmation lists

• The beautiful metaphor behind Ben Platt’s "Grow As We Go"—and how it speaks to the heart of lasting love

Whether you're in the middle of a shift or feeling the distance that change can bring, this episode is a reminder: growth doesn't have to divide you. It can be the very thing that draws you back together.

YOUTUBE: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠⁠⁠

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠⁠⁠

WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠⁠⁠

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Facebook: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/p/Marriage-IQ-61558652547411/⁠

In this soul-searching episode of Marriage IQ, we dive into one of the most overlooked challenges in long-term relationships: how marriage changes you—and what to do when you're not sure who you're becoming.

From becoming parents to launching kids, career pivots to personal losses, the biggest life transitions don’t just change your schedule—they change your identity. And when that happens, even solid marriages can feel off-balance.

We explore the real tension between growing as an individual and growing together, and why the healthiest couples learn to do both.

Inside this episode:

• The identity-shaking moments every couple will face: parenthood, career changes, relocation, loss, and more

• Why it’s normal to feel disconnected—even from yourself—during big transitions

• How to recognize the subtle signs of growing apart before it becomes a crisis

• Why Differentiation of Self is the secret sauce for maintaining “me” without losing “we”

• Tools to talk about who you’re becoming—and how to support your partner in who they’re becoming, too

• We’ll also share vulnerable stories, practical tools, and mindset shifts that help couples not just survive change, but grow stronger because of it.

YOUTUBE: ⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠⁠
FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠⁠
WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠⁠

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In this powerful continuation of their story (see episode 56) , Portia and Chad Louder return to Marriage iQ to share how their marriage not only survived—but deepened—during Portia’s five-year federal prison sentence and beyond.

Chad’s Side of the Story
We hear Chad’s honest perspective as he stepped into single parenting, financial strain, and the emotional weight of holding a family together. His steady commitment reveals what true support looks like under pressure.

Staying Connected Behind Bars
From daily emails to Portia’s vulnerable prison blog, learn how this couple fought to stay emotionally connected across distance, shame, and uncertainty.

The Hard Work of Healing
The Louders open up about reunification after prison—rebuilding trust, helping their teens process pain, and choosing to lead with love, truth, and forgiveness.

Marriage Lessons You’ll Never Forget
Portia and Chad share raw insights on:

• Focusing on your partner’s strengths

• Why choosing love is a daily decision

• The healing power of vulnerability and faith

If you’ve ever wondered whether a marriage can come back from rock bottom—this episode proves that redemption is possible, and love can grow even through life’s darkest chapters.

YOUTUBE: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos⁠

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : ⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies⁠

WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: ⁠https://www.marriageiq.com/daily⁠

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Portia Louder Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/portialouder/

What does true accountability look like in a relationship—especially when trust has been broken?

In this powerful episode of Marriage iQ, we dive into the extraordinary true story of Portia and Chad Louder—a couple whose marriage was tested by addiction, legal trouble, and a seven-year federal prison sentence.

Portia, once a thriving entrepreneur, shares her raw journey from prescription drug dependency to real estate fraud—and the painful wake-up call that changed everything. Her husband, Chad, opens up about what it was like to walk beside her through public shame, personal heartbreak, and ultimately, redemption.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• How childhood trauma and addiction led Portia down a dangerous path

• What it cost her—and her family—when she avoided responsibility

• Chad’s honest reflections on loving someone through crisis

• The spiritual and emotional awakening Portia experienced behind bars

• How accountability, faith, and deep inner work rebuilt not just trust—but a whole new marriage

This is a story about hitting bottom and choosing to rise—with integrity, humility, and fierce love.

Don’t miss Part 2 of this episode, to be released this Friday, where Portia and Chad share the hard-won insights and unexpected grace that helped them thrive after prison.

YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@MarriageIQ/videos

FREE PDF DOWNLOADS : https://www.marriageiq.com/freebies

WEEKLY TIPS NEWSLETTER: https://www.marriageiq.com/daily

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Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marriage.iq/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/Marriage-IQ-61558652547411/

Portia Louder Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/portialouder/