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In this episode, I’m talking about conscious femininity; why the world needs more of it right now, where the phrase comes from (Marion Woodman, via Sharon Blackie’s If Women Rose Rooted), and what it looks like in everyday life.

We explore the difference between unconscious femininity (living “from the neck up,” outsourcing self-worth, over-adapting, over-functioning) and conscious femininity (embodied self-awareness, nervous system regulation, boundaries, cyclical living, and truth-telling with kindness).

I also unpack why this isn’t about man-bashing — conscious femininity is about balance: healthy feminine (intuition, empathy, feeling) + healthy masculine (structure, boundaries, action). In other words: structure with feeling.

Practical takeaways:

• Come back into your body daily (breathwork/HeartMath, walking, nature)
• Learn your nervous system patterns (fight/flight/freeze/fawn)
• Honour your cycles + energy rhythms (stop pushing like a machine)
• Set boundaries without over-explaining
• Notice over-giving/over-functioning — and practise receiving support

If you relate to over-functioning, S5EP1 is a great one to listen to HERE.

Want to go deeper?

Join me in Johannesburg for my in-person weekend workshop, Weaving a New Way (14–15 March, Fourways).

Find out more HERE.

Or explore 1:1 coaching + shamanic healing sessions with me HERE.

I'd love to connect - message me on Instagram @EmmaOBrienCoach.

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

What if feeling lost in midlife isn’t a failure… but an invitation?

In this episode, I’m exploring something I see again and again — both in my own life and in the women I work with. That moment (often in our 40s and beyond) when we wake up and quietly think:

Is this it? Is this really how I want the rest of my life to look?

Midlife has a way of stripping things back. Our hormones shift, our tolerance drops, and suddenly the roles, relationships, and choices we once managed to hold together just don’t fit anymore. What used to feel “fine” starts to feel heavy, exhausting, or even unbearable.

Rather than seeing this as a midlife crisis, I believe it’s something much more powerful — a midlife awakening.

In this episode, I talk about:

• Why so many women feel like they’ve “lost themselves” in midlife
• How societal conditioning teaches women to put everyone else first — and the anger that surfaces when that no longer works
• The role of perimenopause and hormonal shifts in changing what we’re willing (and able) to tolerate
• Why being confronted with our own mortality can actually be a profound gift
• The fear and discomfort of the liminal space between who you were and who you’re becoming
• What we can learn from snake medicine — and why shedding an old identity is meant to feel uncomfortable before it feels freeing

If you’re in that in-between space — not who you were, not yet who you’re becoming — please know this: you’re not destined to be unhappy forever. You’re in transition, and you don’t have to navigate it alone.

✨ Work With Me - If this episode resonated, I’d love to support you further:

🐍 Ending an Era – Online Workshop

This is a powerful, guided workshop where I help you consciously shed old stories, identities, and patterns that no longer fit, so you can create what comes next with clarity and intention.

👉 Access the workshop HERE.

🌿 Johannesburg Weekend Retreat (In-Person)

If you’re based in Joburg and craving a deeper, embodied reset, I’m also hosting a weekend retreat designed for women in transition. This is sacred space to reflect, release, and reconnect with yourself — supported, held, and guided.

👉 Details and booking info are HERE.

Thank you so much for being here, for listening, and for being willing to ask the bigger questions 💛

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

In this episode, I explore why change so often feels uncomfortable, slow, and frustrating, especially when we’re ready for something new but life hasn’t caught up yet.

I reflect on the transition from the Year of the Snake into the Year of the Fire Horse, and why the early part of change is often about shedding old stories before momentum arrives. Using the Andean medicine wheel, I talk about serpent energy as the first stage of transformation; where we release outdated identities, beliefs, and narratives that quietly keep us stuck.

Episode highlights:

• Why change moves in cycles, not straight lines
• The frustration of waiting for external results after deep inner work
• How old stories become part of our identity
• Why repeatedly retelling the past can prevent forward movement
• Serpent, Jaguar, Hummingbird and Eagle as stages of change

I also share four journal prompts to support your own shedding process:

1. What part of my current life story has already expired, but I’m still carrying?
2. Where am I choosing familiarity over aliveness?
3. What does my body tell me about the situation I wish I didn’t have, but keep participating in?
4. What am I afraid would unravel if I stopped telling this story?

Ready to go deeper?

I’m hosting a live online workshop, Ending an Era – A Serpent Workshop for Conscious Shedding, on Thursday 5th February. It’s a 60-minute guided space to help you identify and release the stories keeping you where you are.

£22 | Live on Zoom | Replay included
Sign up HERE: www.emmaobriencoach.com/endinganera

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

How to Stop Over-Functioning & Reclaim Your Energy

Are you exhausted from doing everything for everyone — at home, at work, and in your relationships?

In this episode of the Lemons & Pineapples Podcast I explore over-functioning — the hidden pattern behind burnout, resentment, and chronic over-giving. You’ll learn why so many capable, high-functioning women end up carrying the emotional, mental, and practical load, and how this pattern often starts in childhood.

I unpack how over-functioning shows up in relationships, family dynamics, and the workplace — and why it’s fundamentally a self-worth issue, not a productivity problem.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

• What over-functioning really is (and why it feels “normal”)
• How over-functioning and under-functioning keep each other in place
• Why saying yes resentfully leads to burnout
• The link between over-functioning, fear, and self-worth
• A powerful question that helps you start changing the pattern

If you’re tired of being the reliable one, the capable one, the one who “does it all” — this episode is for you.

👉 WATCH MY FREE OVER-FUNCTIONING MASTERCLASS
Go deeper and learn the practical steps to stop over-functioning and reclaim your energy HERE

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share if this episode resonated with you 💛

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

Divorce can feel like an ending… but what if it’s actually a portal?

In this episode, Emma O’Brien is joined by Isabelle Ulenaers—psychologist, trauma specialist, and best-selling author—who supports women through the emotional aftermath of divorce using a neuroscience-informed blend of psychology, coaching tools, EFT, EMDR, and somatic integration.

Together, we explore why the hardest part often isn’t leaving the marriage… it’s everything that follows: the identity collapse, the shame and guilt, the fear of being “the villain,” and the slow realisation that you’ve been abandoning yourself in tiny, socially acceptable ways for years.

You’ll also hear powerful re-frames—like why it’s okay to leave a relationship that looks “fine” on paper, and how to begin coming back to yourself through small, grounded choices that rebuild self-trust.

In this episode, we cover:

- Why divorce isn’t a failure—it can be the beginning of freedom, identity, and self-return

- The “good wife / good mother” conditioning that keeps women stuck in roles they’ve outgrown

- How self-abandonment happens slowly and subtly—one micro-moment at a time

- The difference between guilt (I did something wrong) and shame (I am something wrong)

- Why leaving a “fine” marriage can feel harder than leaving an obviously bad one

- Isabelle’s Michelin restaurant vs burger and fries analogy (and why it hits so hard)

- What women actually need to rebuild after divorce: inner safety, nervous system regulation, and identity repair

- Why “What do I want?” can be too big at first—and the better starter question to ask

- The practical path back to self: noticing where you feel seen/heard, and where you disappear

- How fear works (and why it shows up the moment you change anything)

- The “fear witch” / Rapunzel metaphor: how fear keeps you in the tower—and how to move anyway

- A potent closing reminder: your needs are non-negotiable

A gentle reflection prompt (from the conversation) If “What do I want?” feels too big, try:

Do I want to be on this stage?

Where do I feel seen, heard, and connected?

Where do I abandon myself—and why?

Connect with Isabelle:

Connect with Isabelle on Instagram—send her a DM and she’ll guide you from there - @isabelle.ulenaers

Loved this episode?

If this landed for you, take a breath and let this be your permission slip:
You’re not “too much.” And you don’t need a dramatic reason to choose yourself.

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

In this episode, I’m sharing the 12 powerful reflection questions I’m personally using to make sure that 2026 is not another year on repeat.

If you’ve ever reached the end of a year thinking “Nothing really changed”, despite good intentions, this episode is for you.

I talk honestly about why 2025 felt like a Groundhog Day year for me, why internal change always comes before external results, and how clarity, self-honesty, and nervous-system-led reflection are the foundations for real transformation.

✨ The 12 Questions to Reflect On for 2026

1️⃣ What went well in 2025?

What were your wins? What brought you joy, growth, or insight?

2️⃣ What didn’t work?

What felt heavy, draining, misaligned, or simply didn’t move the needle?

3️⃣ What patterns repeated in 2025?

In work, relationships, or behaviours, and what part did you play in keeping them alive?

4️⃣ What gave you energy and what drained it?

Who and what lit you up? Who and what left you depleted?

5️⃣ Who truly supported you?

And who couldn’t meet you where you were?

6️⃣ What did 2025 teach you about who you are becoming?

What identity shifts happened beneath the surface?

7️⃣ What do you want to be celebrating at the end of 2026?

Be specific. What does “success” actually look like for you?

8️⃣ What are your top 3 priorities for 2026 and why?

The why is everything when motivation dips.

9️⃣ What habits, behaviours, or beliefs need to be released?

What’s quietly keeping you stuck or playing small?

🔟 What daily or weekly practices will support you?

Especially practices that regulate your nervous system and keep you grounded.

1️⃣1️⃣ Where did you experience the most joy or peace last year?

And how can you consciously create more of that?

1️⃣2️⃣ If you met your future self at the end of 2026…

What would they thank you for starting now?

💫 Want to Go Deeper?

I’m hosting a New Year Reflection & Intention Setting Workshop where we'll:

- Break unconscious patterns
- Shift limiting beliefs
- Ground intentions into your nervous system
- Journey to meet your future self

📅 Wednesday 7th January
🕖 7pm UK | 9pm South Africa I 2pm EST I 11am PST
🎥 Replay available
💷 £22

👉 All details and the booking link are HERE

Thank you, as always, for being here and sharing this space with me.
I’ll see you in the next episode 💛

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

Have you reached the end of this year and realised… nothing has really changed?

In this episode of Lemons & Pineapples, I’m speaking directly to you if you promised yourself last year would be different — and you’re now finding yourself in the same relationship, the same financial loop, the same job, or the same patterns that have followed you for years.

If 2025 is coming to a close and you’re feeling frustrated, disappointed, or quietly asking yourself “How am I still here?” — this episode is for you.

I share honestly about why real change doesn’t happen just because we want it to, and what actually needs to shift so that 2026 doesn’t become another repeat of the past. We often know what actions we should take, but still don’t take them — and the reason for that lives much deeper than motivation or willpower.

In this episode, I invite you to slow down and reflect on:

• Why familiarity keeps us stuck more than fear
• How unconscious beliefs drive our choices around relationships, money, and career
• Why we avoid difficult conversations and big decisions
• How self-worth sits at the centre of lasting change
• The real cost of staying exactly where you are for another year

I walk you through three powerful questions that will help you identify what hasn’t changed, why it hasn’t changed, and what needs to shift internally for your external reality to finally move.

This episode is also a personal declaration. I share my own commitment to doing things differently — and I invite you to make that commitment with me.

I also share details of my New Year Reflection & Intention Setting Workshop, where I’ll guide you through reflecting on 2025, releasing what hasn’t worked, and consciously stepping into the version of you who finishes 2026 in a very different place.

Sign up to the New Year Workshop HERE.

If you’re tired of telling yourself “next year will be different” and you’re ready to understand what actually creates change — this episode will meet you exactly where you are.

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.

Send us a text

In this powerful and deeply honest conversation, I'm joined by clinical psychologist, relationship coach, and bestselling author Dr. Ray Doktor to explore why so many capable, self-aware women keep finding themselves drawn to emotionally unavailable men and, more importantly, how to change that pattern at the root.

Together, we unpack the hidden beliefs, childhood conditioning, attachment dynamics, and unspoken fears that keep women over-functioning, people-pleasing, and waiting for men to meet their potential rather than their reality.

This episode goes beyond surface-level dating advice and dives into the belief shifts, communication skills, and self-worth work required to create relationships rooted in mutual availability, safety, and growth.

If you’ve ever thought:

• “If I ask for what I need, he’ll leave”
• “I just need to be more understanding”
• “Why do I always attract the same kind of man?”

…this conversation will land deeply.

✨ In this episode, we explore:

• The core hidden belief that pulls powerful women toward unavailable partners
• Why over-functioning and “being the strong one” can repel emotionally available men
• The danger of falling in love with potential instead of reality
• How early family dynamics shape adult relationship patterns
• Why poor communication isn’t cruelty — it’s often immaturity and lack of modeling
• The fear many women carry: “If I speak my truth, I’ll be abandoned”
• How to tell the difference between healthy compromise and self-betrayal
• Why relationships don’t complete us — they reveal us
• What emotionally mature dating actually looks like in practice

Dr. Ray also shares the key beliefs that quietly sabotage relationships and explains why healing your inner world is the most reliable way to change who you attract.

📘 Recommended Resource

Dr. Ray’s book:

All It Takes Is One; Drop Your One BIG Hidden Belief and Master Your Life

A powerful blend of insight and practical exercises to help you identify and release the one belief holding you back — in love and life. Buy the book HERE.

🔗 Connect with Dr. Ray

Visit his website for workshops, coaching, and resources:
raydoktor.com

If you’re done playing small and ready to lead yourself — you’re in the right place.

I’m Emma O’Brien — Martha Beck trained and certified life coach, HeartMath practitioner, and shamanic healer helping high-achieving women stop second-guessing themselves and finally trust their own voice.

Through nervous system re-calibration, strategic coaching, and deep energetic work, I help you move from self-doubt to self-trust so you can create a life you actually want to be in — no external approval required.

🌀 Want to work together?

Explore the 6-week Nervous System Reset, 1:1 coaching, or Shamanic Soul Retrieval sessions here: emmaobriencoach.com

Questions or ready to chat?

DM me on Instagram @emmaobriencoach
or book a free connection call HERE.