After diligently raising her children in the church and conservative Christianity, Regan was shocked when her son Jonas confessed to not believing in the existence of God. Regan discusses how she saw proper Christian parenting as a step-by-step process that guaranteed the perseverance of her children's faith. The shift in her son's faith made it difficult for Regan to watch other Christian parents send their kids off on missions trips or marry their kids to other young Christians.

We discuss Regan's journey leaving an abusive church, trusting a new community, and the developmental appropriateness of questioning belief during adolescence. She highlights the importance of retaining a loving and supportive relationship with her children, irrespective of their religious beliefs. Regan shares honestly about how her own faith has been challenged and refined as she navigates these realities.

Topics we discuss:

- Parenting

- Conservative Christianity

- Homeschooling

- Atheism

- Views on hell

- Eastern Orthodoxy

- Spiritual and church abuse

- Child development

- Leaving room for mystery in faith

- Importance of safe community

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Contact Pat: PATRICKTLEE7@GMAIL.COM

New Substack for the podcast! https://iusedtothink.substack.com/p/what-i-used-to-think-recovering-from?r=ljh57

Follow on Instagram: @iusedtothinkpodcast

Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@iusedtothinkpodcast

New Substack for the podcast! https://iusedtothink.substack.com/p/what-i-used-to-think-recovering-from?r=ljh57

Follow on Instagram: @iusedtothinkpodcast

Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@iusedtothinkpodcast

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When Marianne was 21 years old, she started dating, Tony, the man of her dreams. Initially smitten and deeply infatuated, she thought of him constantly. Then nine months into the relationship, these feelings began to fade and Marianne experienced intense emotional turmoil, leading her to question the nature of love and her connection with Tony. It affected her so deeply that she couldn't eat or sleep.

Marianne talks about how society has idolized romantic love and elevated it to a godlike status, expecting it to fulfill our every need. Doubt is not presented as a normal part of relationships but rather a sign that something is wrong. Through resources like Cheryl Paul's work on relationship anxiety, Marianne discovered that love is more about action and commitment rather than just feelings. She learned that love is a choice to commit to someone even when it's difficult.

Marianne's podcast about fantasy books: https://open.spotify.com/show/2AmfNU6P3iINRmE2x3uAgS?si=MNhfRqfkS8eEotCh4B4F8Q

Marianne's newly published children's book about children of immigrant parents: https://www.amazon.com/Came-Here-You-Marianne-Boules/dp/1662953585

Topics we discuss:

- Relationship anxiety

- Infatuation stage of a relationship

- Romantic love versus real love

- Love as a choice

- Elizabeth Gilbert's book "Eat, Pray, Love"

- Hozier's song "Take Me to Church"

- Romantic love as a deity in culture

- Doubt as a normal part of relationships

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Contact Pat: PATRICKTLEE7@GMAIL.COM

I created a new Substack for the podcast! It was time to revive my 2008 blogging skills. My first article is about my own "I Used to Think..." journey. Check it out here: https://iusedtothink.substack.com/p/what-i-used-to-think-recovering-from?r=ljh57

Follow on Instagram: @iusedtothinkpodcast

Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@iusedtothinkpodcast

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Guy assumed there would be a day where he finally felt complete as a person. Looking back, he realized that instead, life is a journey of moments of completion. I talk with Guy about the concepts of growth, maturity, and the journey towards personal completion. We explore metaphors like lighthouses and skyscrapers to illustrate the differences between internal transformation and external appearances. We talk about our childhood perceptions of adulthood and evolving understandings of what it means to be complete. Guy shares the importance of recognizing life milestones of "completion" such as becoming a parent for the first time. We also delve into the importance of self-awareness and the invaluable role of mentors and spiritual guidance in navigating the ongoing journey of personal growth.

Contact Pat:

DM me on Instagram! @iusedtothinkpodcast

Email: PATRICKTLEE7@GMAIL.COM