They're doing some wicked things to our brains, aren't they? Mostly old people, it seems. Young people are already dead, so there's no point even concerning ourselves with that. There isn't going to be a world left when it's their turn to take over and run things, so I say just let their brains go smooth from Family Guy clips and doordash. We should be treating twenty year olds like they're sick dogs. Every teenager working at a grocery store should be pampered like a labrador with bone cancer. Let them suck on the candy vapes and wear enormous silver headphones they casually bump aside when you're talking to them and they go "huh?" and that's the most their capable of saying for another hour. Words are hard, and they're meant to convey ideas anyway so why bother teaching them how language works. Ideas are done. Old people though... some of them are going to live another twenty years or more and they're getting worse and worse. Facebook has turned them all into satan worshipping pedophile apologists who think cats can talk and hawks can steal babies from porches. They're falling headfirst into their own narcissism and producing AI slop that justifies their warped views on race and equality. We have to stop them because they can't, for the life of them, stop fucking voting.

Or however you celebrate. Is that how that works? Is Pride Month kind of like Christmas, where some assholes on the internet are debating the merits of including other holidays into seasonal greetings? Is there a Jewish holiday happening in June. I bet there fucking is. There's always some bullshit happening with candles or weird stews, and we all have to pretend like it's some ancient beautiful ceremony... look, sometimes I start typing these things and I lose track of what my point is or whose side I'm taking for the sake of argument. To clarify, this is a pro-Jewish ethnicity anti-Judaism podcast. Or maybe the other way around. Which one is the Zionist one? Both? Damn... alright nevermind. This is a pro-human anti-everyone podcast with semitic undertones that are largely positive. Or it's a semiticly ambiguous podcast fixated on cost of living complaints and an exhaustion with modern culture, and if I just so happen to slipup and say something you disagree with it's not my fault because I'm mentally ill and you're actually being mean.

Changing things up around here. My normal co-host had to call in sick because I guess his butthole was too sore from the long weekend he had down at the Gay Club. I don't want to embarrass him, of course, but I will tell you the photos he sent for evidence are harrowing. It's the kind of thing you'll see that makes you rethink progressive politics. I don't even know how you fit that many objects inside yourself. But regardless, this week we have a special guest who just so happens to live with me and is obligated to do something if I start crying. The audio might be weird because her voice is quieter than mine, but as always I implore you to locate that button on the side of your phone that increases volume. When do you think Apple is getting rid of that, by the way? When will we have an iphone that has no buttons at all, and you have to pay an additional $10 a month to access control over volume and when you can turn the phone on? I can't wait. The future is so bright.