Episode 56: Parents, Raise Kind Kids: When Words Follow Our Children Home

Our seven year old went to school excited about her new hairstyle.

She came home with most of it undone.

A classmate had told her it was ugly and looked like spiders, so she took it out. The next day, the same child ruined a self portrait she had drawn.

Then, later that week, we were called into the principal's office and shown a picture our daughter had drawn.

Across the top she had written:

“How can I be dead if kids be mean to me?”

She's seven.

This week we're having a conversation we never wanted to have. We're sharing what happened, what we learned after talking with our daughter, the heartbreak and anger we felt as her parents, and what we believe our responsibility is now.

We're also talking about something this experience forced us to confront: our kids can be carrying far more than we realize. Sometimes the bubbly, energetic kid is hurting too. Sometimes “school was good” isn't enough. Sometimes behavior is telling us something, and we need to slow down long enough to notice it.

But this conversation isn't only for parents whose children are being bullied.

It's also for the rest of us.

Because sometimes our child is the one doing the hurting.

Our kids will get it wrong. They'll say something cruel. They'll hurt someone's feelings. When that happens, our job isn't to get defensive or blame somebody else. Our job is to own it, correct it, model something better, and teach our children to be kind.

Don't just raise successful kids.

Don't just raise athletic kids.

Raise kind kids.

Raise kids who notice the child sitting alone. Raise kids who don't make fun of someone because they look different. Raise kids who understand their words have weight. Raise kids who apologize when they get it wrong. Raise kids who understand that kindness isn't weakness.

Because we can't control every voice our children will hear. But we can teach them which voices deserve to be believed, and we can raise children who use their own voices to build others up.

In this episode:

• Recognizing when behavior may be communicating something deeper

• Why we shouldn't minimize our children's emotions

• Listening before trying to fix the problem

• Taking concerning language seriously

• Advocating for and protecting our children

• Grounding our kids in their identity in Christ

• What to do when your child is the one being unkind

• Raising compassionate kids in an increasingly unkind world

Support The Podcast

If Dream Small has encouraged you, please consider rating, reviewing and sharing the show.

Support Dream Small:

Support the Dream Small Podcast

Speaking Requests:

Jason and Whitney are available to speak about foster care, adoption, faith, leadership and finding meaning through small acts of faithfulness.

dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

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Music Credit: “Paradise Found” by Kevin MacLeod, Creative Commons.

We love foster care. We love the children God has brought into our home, we're grateful for the privilege of loving them, and we know this is something God has called our family to do.

And sometimes, we're just tired.

Actually, weary might be the better word.

Because foster care can wear on more than your body. There's the interrupted sleep, appointments, therapies, visits, diapers, school schedules, medical needs, and the constant juggling of everyday life. But there's also the mental load of keeping everything straight, the exhaustion that comes from constantly advocating, the frustration of navigating a complicated system, and the emotional weight of loving a child deeply while knowing you may eventually have to say goodbye.

In this episode, we're having an honest conversation about that weariness and the guilt that can sometimes come with admitting it.

We chose this life. We said yes. We know these children didn't choose what happened to them. So sometimes it feels like we don't have the right to say that it's hard.

But gratitude and weariness can coexist.

We talk about what foster parent weariness has looked like in our home, from the mundane tasks that pile up to the mental load of managing seven kids, therapies, visits, court hearings, school schedules, and medical appointments. Whitney shares about the exhausting work of advocating for our children and a recent win after weeks of pushing for one of our foster children's needs to be accurately recognized.

We also talk about the emotional side of foster care that can be harder to see. Foster parents are asked to fully love and attach to children while knowing reunification may mean eventually saying goodbye. We're walking alongside children through pain we can't fix while also helping the other children in our home process the brokenness they're witnessing.

That's heavy.

But weariness doesn't mean we're doing something wrong. And it doesn't mean we're no longer called.

Galatians 6:9 reminds us, "Let us not become weary in doing good."

So what do we do when we are weary?

We acknowledge it. We talk about it. We ask for help. We allow our community to step in. We bring the burden to God instead of convincing ourselves that being strong means carrying everything alone.

And sometimes, like the bison facing a storm, we simply turn toward the hard season instead of running from it.

If you're a foster parent who is tired right now, we hope this episode reminds you that you're not alone. The small acts of faithfulness still matter. God sees the appointments, the late nights, the phone calls, the advocacy, the waiting, and all the things nobody else sees.

Don't give up.

You're not meant to carry this alone.

Support the Podcast

If Dream Small has encouraged you and you'd like to help us continue sharing stories about foster care, adoption, faith, leadership, and living faithfully right where you are, you can support the podcast here:

https://dream-small-podcast.captivate.fm/support

Speaking Requests

If your church, conference, foster care organization, or event would like Jason and Whitney to speak about foster care, adoption, faith, leadership, or living a meaningful life through small acts of faithfulness, we'd love to hear from you.

Email us at dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com.

Follow & Contact

Instagram: @dreamsmallpodcast

Facebook: Dream Small Podcast

Twitter/X: @DreamSmallShow

YouTube: @dreamsmallpodcast

Email: info@dreamsmallpodcast.com

If this episode encouraged you, please follow the podcast, leave a rating or review, and share it with someone who needs to hear it.

Music Credit

"Paradise Found" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons.

The Freedom To Parent Your Family Differently

What happens when the best decision for your family doesn't make sense to everyone else?

In this episode, we share the story behind a vacation decision that surprised some people: taking only our three oldest children on a family trip while our younger children stayed home. What started as a practical choice became a powerful reminder that parents have the freedom and responsibility to make decisions based on the unique needs of their own family.

Too often, parents feel pressure from culture, social media, friends, family members, and even other Christians about how they should raise their children. But many parenting decisions are not about right versus wrong. They are about wisdom, season, calling, and faithfully stewarding the children God has entrusted to you.

We discuss how foster care helped us become more confident in making unconventional decisions, why healthy families must adapt as seasons change, and how to seek God's wisdom instead of the approval of others.

If you've ever felt judged, second guessed yourself, or wondered whether you're doing enough as a parent, this conversation is for you.

In This Episode

• Why we chose to vacation with only our three oldest children

• The difference between cultural expectations and biblical wisdom

• How comparison can undermine confidence in parenting

• Why healthy families adapt as seasons change

• Practical examples of parenting differently in our own home

• How foster care shaped our perspective on family decisions

• Why every child may need a different parenting approach

• The importance of seeking wisdom instead of approval

• Learning to be comfortable being misunderstood

• Trusting God with the results of your parenting decisions

Key Takeaways

• Different does not mean wrong

• Every family has unique needs, challenges, and seasons

• Parents are called to steward the children God entrusted to them

• Not every parenting decision is a moral issue

• Comparison often leads parents away from wisdom

• Confidence grows when decisions are rooted in prayer and Scripture

• Healthy families remain flexible as circumstances change

Memorable Quotes

"Other people may not understand your parenting decisions. Other people may not agree with your parenting decisions. And guess what? They don't have to."

"We get to decide what works best for the family God has given us."

"Healthy families have to adjust with the seasons."

"Different doesn't mean wrong."

"God has entrusted your children to you. Do what's best for your children."

Scripture Referenced

1 Corinthians 12

The body of Christ has many parts, each serving a unique purpose.

Question For Reflection

What parenting decision have you been delaying because of pressure from culture, social media, friends, or family?

What might change if you sought God's wisdom before seeking everyone's approval?

Resources & Connect

Resources & Connect

Support Dream Small

If Dream Small has encouraged you and you'd like to help us continue creating content that supports foster families, adoptive families, and parents, you can support the podcast here:

https://dream-small-podcast.captivate.fm/support

Invite Us To Speak

Jason and Whitney are available to speak at churches, foster care events, conferences, retreats, and community organizations on topics including foster care, adoption, parenting, faith, leadership, and serving right where you are.

For speaking inquiries, email: dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

Connect With Us

dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

Instagram: @dreamsmallpodcast

Facebook: Dream Small Podcast

X: @DreamSmallShow

YouTube: @dreamsmallpodcast

If this episode encouraged you, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who could use a little encouragement today.

Music Credit

"Paradise Found" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons.

Just when you've finally built trust with a case worker, therapist, or visit supervisor...they're gone.

If you've been in foster care for any length of time, you know the feeling. You're explaining the history all over again, rebuilding relationships, and wondering if anyone else remembers what your child has already been through.

In this episode, we share some very real frustrations from our own current foster care journey and talk honestly about the constant turnover that seems to define the system. We discuss why it happens, why it hurts so much, and some practical ways foster parents can survive the revolving door without becoming cynical.

Most importantly, we remind ourselves that while people come and go, Jesus never changes. Your consistency may be one of the greatest gifts a child ever experiences.

Whether you're a foster parent, adoptive parent, or someone who simply wants to better understand the challenges families face, we hope this conversation encourages you to keep showing up faithfully, right where you are.

In This Episode

• Why turnover is so common in foster care

• The emotional toll of constantly rebuilding relationships

• Why documentation can become one of your greatest tools

• Leading with grace while still holding people accountable

• The importance of staying child focused

• How new people can sometimes bring fresh perspective and renewed hope

• Why Christ remains our foundation when everything else changes

Scripture

Hebrews 13:8

"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever."

Resources & Ways to Connect

Support the Dream Small Podcast

If this podcast has encouraged you or helped you on your foster care or adoption journey, we'd be honored if you'd consider supporting the ministry. Your generosity helps us continue creating free, hope-filled content for foster families and those considering saying yes.

Support the show: https://dreamsmallpodcast.com/support

Invite Us to Speak

Jason and Whitney love encouraging foster families, churches, ministries, and community organizations through honest storytelling and practical encouragement rooted in faith.

If you're interested in having us speak at your church, conference, foster parent support group, or event, we'd love to connect.

Speaking inquiries: dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

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Join our email community for weekly encouragement, devotionals, and updates from the Dream Small Podcast.

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Connect With Us

Website: https://dreamsmallpodcast.com

Email: dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

Instagram: @dreamsmallpodcast

Facebook: Dream Small Podcast

X: @dreamsmallshow

If This Episode Encouraged You

Please follow the show, leave a five star review, and share this episode with a friend or fellow foster family. Every share helps us reach more people with the hope that small, everyday faithfulness can change lives.

Music Credit

"Paradise Found" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons.

Summer is supposed to be the season of slowing down, making memories, and enjoying extra time together as a family.

But for many foster, adoptive, and biological families, summer can quickly feel overwhelming. The routines disappear. The schedules change. The snacks never end. The laundry piles up. The house is never quite clean. And somehow everyone is hungry again twenty minutes after they just ate.

In this episode, Jason and Whitney share an honest conversation about navigating summer as foster parents raising a large family. From managing camps, appointments, technology, and chores to handling emotional dysregulation, changing routines, and the unique challenges children from hard places often face, they discuss practical ways to survive the summer season while still enjoying it.

Summer can be especially challenging for children who thrive on predictability. For many foster and adoptive families, the structure provided by school creates a sense of safety and stability. When that routine suddenly disappears, children may struggle with increased anxiety, emotional outbursts, boredom, or behavioral challenges. At the same time, parents often feel pressure to create the "perfect summer" filled with activities, trips, and memorable experiences.

Jason and Whitney challenge that mindset by encouraging families to focus less on perfection and more on connection. Some of the most meaningful memories are often found in the simplest moments: family walks, backyard adventures, jumping on the trampoline in the rain, or spending uninterrupted time together.

In This Episode:

• Why summer can feel more difficult than expected for foster and adoptive families

• The importance of balancing freedom with structure

• How routines create safety and stability for children

• Why boredom can actually be healthy and productive

• Managing technology and encouraging creativity

• Practical tips for camps, appointments, transportation, and scheduling

• Pool safety reminders every parent should hear

• Setting healthy boundaries and protecting your family's peace

• Why children often remember simple moments more than expensive experiences

• How to create meaningful summer memories without exhausting yourself

Our Challenge For You This Week

Take a few minutes as a family and ask a simple question:

What do we want this summer to feel like?

Not what you want to spend. Not what you want to accomplish. Not what everyone else is posting on social media.

What memories do you want to make? What family rhythms do you want to build? What moments of connection do you want to create?

Then choose one simple step this week that moves your family in that direction.

Maybe it's a family walk. Maybe it's a backyard movie night. Maybe it's a tech-free evening. Maybe it's simply being more present with your children.

The most meaningful summers are rarely the busiest ones.

Support Dream Small

If Dream Small has encouraged you in your foster care, adoption, parenting, or faith journey, would you consider supporting the podcast? Your support helps us continue creating conversations that encourage families and shine a light on the realities of foster care.

Support the podcast at: https://www.dreamsmallpodcast.com/support

Invite Dream Small To Speak

Jason and Whitney regularly speak at churches, foster parent groups, conferences, and community events about foster care, adoption, faith, leadership, and building strong families.

For speaking inquiries, contact:

dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

Connect With Dream Small

Facebook: Dream Small Podcast

Instagram: @dreamsmallpodcast

YouTube: Dream Small Podcast

Music Credit

"Paradise Found" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons.

What Happened After We Said Yes To Foster Care

Eight years ago, we said yes to foster care.

At the time, we had no idea how much that simple decision would change our lives. We couldn't have imagined the children who would come through our home, the adoptions that would follow, the reunifications we would celebrate, or the lessons God would teach us along the way.

For our 50th episode, we're taking a step back and sharing the story behind Dream Small.

What began after the heartbreak of a miscarriage eventually led us into foster care. We talk about how we first became licensed, what it was like welcoming our very first placement, the trauma that opened our eyes to realities we had never fully understood, and the moments that shaped our family over the past eight years.

Along the way, we've welcomed 14 foster placements into our home, adopted three incredible children, experienced both heartbreak and joy, and learned that God often works through ordinary acts of obedience.

In this episode, we share the hardest parts of foster care, the beautiful moments that made it worthwhile, the importance of community, and why we continue to trust God with whatever comes next.

Whether you've been listening since the beginning or you're brand new to Dream Small, this episode is the most complete version of our story we've ever shared.

In This Episode

• How a miscarriage helped launch our foster care journey

• Why we chose foster care before adoption

• The story of our first placement and the lessons that changed us forever

• What we've learned from eight years of foster care

• The hardest realities foster families face

• The beauty of reunification, adoption, and healing

• How community carried us through difficult seasons

• Why saying yes to God changed our family forever

• The Scriptures that sustained us throughout the journey

• The story behind the name Dream Small

Key Scriptures

Galatians 6:9

Luke 16:10

2 Corinthians 4:18

Romans 12:1

Support The Podcast

Speaking Requests

If your church, conference, or organization would like Jason and Whitney to speak about foster care, adoption, faith, leadership, or living a meaningful life through small acts of faithfulness, you can contact them at: dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

Join our weekly devotional newsletter here:

https://captivate.us4.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=c75f5dfcf9d690c6c9f256d22&id=d17b98130b

Follow & Contact

Email: dreamsmallpodcast@gmail.com

Instagram: @dreamsmallpodcast

Facebook: Dream Small Podcast

Twitter/X: @DreamSmallShow

Music Credit

"Paradise Found" Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons.