『Delight Your Marriage』のカバーアート

Delight Your Marriage

Delight Your Marriage

著者： Belah Rose | Author Podcaster & Marital Intimacy Enthusiast
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 Husbands and wives were designed to be different. You want different things in marriage and intimacy on every level (emotional, spiritual, and physical). Whether you're a wife or a husband, whether you're suffering or pretty good... and you're looking for Bible-based insights and scriptural practical guidance on how to transform your marriage, you've found the right podcast! We have "transformation stories" that will inspire hope that putting into practice these principles, by God's grace, can truly change your intimacy completely. If you're looking to see how to transform your marriage sign up for a free Clarity Call, we can hear your story and work with you to determine if we are confident we can help you: https://www.delightyourmarriage.com/cc(c) Delight Your Marriage キリスト教 スピリチュアリティ 聖職・福音主義 衛生・健康的な生活
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  • 506-How to Not Have an Affair: Interview with Gary Thomas

    506-How to Not Have an Affair: Interview with Gary Thomas
    2025/10/24
    It doesn’t start with scandal. It often doesn't even start with feelings. It starts with a smile. A moment of connection. A conversation that feels easy—maybe easier than the ones you’ve been having at home. You walk away thinking, That was nothing. But somewhere deep down, you also know—it could become something. If that’s where you find yourself today (or even if you’ve seen the warning signs in someone you love), please take a deep breath. You’re not broken. You didn't marry the wrong person. You haven't done an irredeemable thing with no going back. You’re human. And this conversation is meant to bring you hope, not shame. In my conversation with Gary Thomas today—pastor and bestselling author of Sacred Marriage—he shared that when a group of wives was asked "How many times do you think a married man has had extramarital feelings for someone?", they all responded with zero. When he asked the same question to a group of husbands, they all said somewhere from 4 to 6. What we are saying is that attraction and feelings for someone other than your spouse are not often talked about, but are pretty common- for both husbands and wives. And we believe that bringing this into the light will take some of the shame off of these feelings and also help people not to go down a road they think has no return. Gary Thomas on Attraction and Integrity Gary has been married for over 40 years, and he’s seen a lot—as a pastor, counselor, and husband. He told me, “The reason we make a commitment is because we know there will always be another person who draws us for a moment. Commitment means we already know what to do with it—and what not to do with it.” We don’t often talk about attraction outside of marriage unless it’s already turned into an affair. But Gary’s heart is to normalize awareness before it becomes destruction. In our talk, Gary referenced a romantic comedy movie where a married bus driver begins to become attracted to a girl on a bicycle. Finally, a friend of the bus driver gently confronts him and says: “There will always be a girl on the bicycle.” In other words, there will always be someone who catches your eye. The key isn’t pretending that will never happen—it’s learning how to respond when it does. Gary reminded me that having an attraction isn’t the sin. Entertaining it is. The feelings themselves don’t make you unfaithful—they make you human. But where you let those feelings go next? That’s where faithfulness begins. The Subtle Steps Toward an Affair Gary shared that most affairs don’t start with a dramatic choice—they start with small, quiet ones. Little compromises that feel “innocent.” He shared with a story of a woman who did end up having a physical affair. She recounted that it wasn't just one day to the next, but that there were actually several steps that happened before they were physically intimate. She shares that she could have turned back at any of these step, had she known before. She also shares the grief after it was all done at waking up to "just a dude in her bed"– not the escape or rescue or romance the temptation had promised. Here are the steps she shared and the pattern Gary’s seen over and over again: You share marriage frustrations with someone of the opposite sex. You sense a spark—and feel seen or understood. You start caring how you look around them. You think about them when they’re not around. That’s the prelude. It doesn’t feel dangerous yet, but it’s where hearts begin to shift. Gary said, “If you can recognize it early, you can stop it before it ever grows.” From there, people will often begin to have an emotional affair: 5. You fantasize about being together. 6. Manipulating circumstances to spend more time together. 7. You start playful banter or flirtation. 8. Friends notice—and ask what’s going on. This is a wake-up call. Gary said, “If people around you see it, something’s already happening.” They’re seeing what your heart is trying not to admit. Then, comes the actual physical affair: 9. Meeting together in secrecy. 10. Texting or calling in ways you hide from your spouse. 11. Physical intimacy. This is the final step—but it’s never the first. We don't share this to shame. Maybe you've already partaken in some of these steps. We share because it is not too late to turn back. Gary said, “If you know the steps, you can stop at any one of them." When You Have Extramarital Feelings, Here's What to Do If you do end up experiencing feelings or attraction for someone other than your spouse—don’t panic. Don’t spiral into guilt. Instead, bring it into the light. Tell a trusted, godly friend of your same sex. Talk to your spouse if it’s wise to do so. And most importantly—talk to Jesus. Ask Him to help you see the truth: that this isn’t love, it’s a lure. Temptation often feels like relief at first—but ...
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    1 時間 7 分
  • 505-How a Family Life Educator Took Her Marriage from Good to Great: Jen's Story

    505-How a Family Life Educator Took Her Marriage from Good to Great: Jen's Story
    2025/10/17
    How a Family Life Educator Took Her Marriage from Good to Great: Jen's Story Sometimes, the couples who join our programs aren’t on the brink of divorce. They aren’t fighting all the time. They actually have a good marriage. But deep down, they know it could be better. That’s exactly where Jen was when she found Delight Your Marriage. “We Had a Good Marriage… But I Knew It Could Be More” Jen and her husband had been married nearly 15 years. They had three young kids, a busy life, and no major marital crisis. As she put it, “We were not in conflict with each other. We didn’t have any major issues that we were dealing with from our past. You know, no unfaithfulness, nothing like that.” Still, something inside her longed for more. She said to us, “I think the thing that drove me into it was knowing that our marriage was good, but understanding or having this feeling that it could be better.” She remembered a pastor that had mentioned Delight Your Marriage to her and from there, took the leap of faith to schedule a Clarity Call. And what she discovered surprised her. Through honest reflection and intentional questions, she realized that while her marriage looked peaceful from the outside, her heart was carrying something deeper: resentment. She had no idea that this resentment had snuck into her heart, but once she saw it, she was set on rooting it out. When Self-Pity Sneaks Into a Good Marriage Not only did Jen identify resentment in her heart, but she discovered she had also been carrying self-pity. In listening to an episode of the podcast on self-pity before joining the program, she realized the topic was actually hitting her heart. [For those interested: https://delightyourmarriage.com/393-the-sin-of-self-pity-aka-pride/] In that moment, God started something new. Through the program, Jen learned to let go of resentment and embrace gratitude. She began to see her husband not as someone who wasn’t “doing enough,” but as a man faithfully serving and providing for their family. That simple—but powerful—shift changed everything. The Power of Peace in a Great Marriage As Jen walked through the program, she noticed a transformation in herself. Through the "heart" work, she found that her soul was also being renewed and that God was was reworking things her heart she didn't even know where there. And the result of that heart change? Peace. With Jen getting rid of the resentment, putting aside the self-pity, and bringing in appreciation, compliments, and admiration- it changed the atmosphere of their homes. Jen’s husband even came home one evening during his busiest season, wrapped her in a hug, and said, “Thank you. I’ve noticed how much more peaceful our home has been.” She hadn’t been trying to get him to notice—but he did. What she considered a small change was actually impactful. “It was a change enough that he felt it too” How God Turns a Good Marriage Into a Great One When we allow God to transform us, our marriage begins to shift. Jen said, “Our connection as a result of, I think just the peacefulness in the home and between us and our gratefulness for each other has brought us closer together in intimacy…” Yes, even their physical intimacy changed! Before the program, intimacy was about once a week. Now? “Two or three times,” she said, smiling. And not only has the frequency been upped, but they are enjoying each other more (a major win!) And it wasn’t a formula or manipulation—it was the result of a softened heart. A Christ-Centered Model for Marriage Transformation As a former family life educator in her church, Jen had led marriage classes before. So she was skeptical—could DYM really offer something new? After completing the program, she said, “I haven’t encountered anything as beneficial, and that actually works as well, as what DYM does. And I think a huge part of that is because of, well, the commitment to Scripture and actually putting it into practice.” Jen’s favorite part? The women’s small group. “A place that’s safe, encouraging, and honest,” she said. “We prayed for each other, celebrated each other’s wins, and shared struggles without fear of judgment. I’ve never experienced community like that.” There’s Always More God Wants to Do in Your Marriage When asked what she’d tell another wife who has a good marriage but knows there’s more, Jen didn’t hesitate: “I think I would just say...wherever you are in your marriage, if you think there’s room for growth, then there’s probably room for growth. So go after it, go after it, go after it...I would, for sure say, do it with DYM, because I think it’s... I think it’s a powerful, powerful program.” Jen’s words remind us that “good” isn’t the goal. God desires great marriages—ones marked by peace, gratitude, and deep connection. Wherever your marriage is at: whether you're separated and not speaking or in a good place but wanting...
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    28 分
  • 504-When Your Words Actually Bring Life (And How to Avoid Death): Interview With Ann & Dave Wilson

    504-When Your Words Actually Bring Life (And How to Avoid Death): Interview With Ann & Dave Wilson
    2025/10/10
    When Your Words Actually Bring Life (And How to Avoid Death): Interview With Ann & Dave Wilson Do you remember when you first fell in love—how easy it was to cheer him on? You’d light up at his stories. You’d say, “You’re amazing!” and mean it. You noticed everything good. But somewhere along the way, the cheers turned into corrections. The same man who once felt like your hero now feels like your project. And instead of applause, he mostly hears... boo. That’s what Ann Wilson discovered the day her husband, Dave, vulnerably told a room full of women that marriage sometimes felt that way to him—like he’d walked off the football field to a stadium full of boos. Ann was stunned. She thought she was helping him. But in that moment, she realized how her words had chipped away at his confidence and joy. I was so honored to talk with Dave and Ann Wilson—pastors, marriage speakers, authors of Vertical Marriage, and co-hosts of FamilyLife Today. For more than 30 years, they’ve led thousands of couples toward hope, healing, and connection. But their story didn’t start with success. The Power of Words in Scripture Scripture is clear: “The tongue has the power of life and death.” — Proverbs 18:21 Your words can resurrect a weary heart—or crush it. They can draw your husband home or make him quietly retreat. And as Dave and Ann share, the transformation didn’t start with more compliments or clever communication—it started with repentance. A Night of Repentance and New Beginning in Marriage Ten years into marriage, they were on the verge of losing everything. Dave was busy building ministry– starting a new church at home and a chaplain for the Detroit Lions, often times away traveling with the team. Meanwhile, Ann was at home with two little boys, beginning to feel lonely, angry, and done. One night, sitting in a parked car late at night on their 10 year anniversary, she finally said, “I’ve lost all my feelings for you.” Dave was stunned. He thought they were great. Ann had never shared otherwise. How could she say he was disregarding her? How could she say she felt alone and he was always away? As he reached for his planner to defend himself, the the gentle and firm voice of the Holy Spirit whispered: “Repent.” He dropped his arguments and dropped to his knees—right there in the front seat of their Honda Accord. He realized he had put himself first instead of Jesus. In that sacred moment, Ann felt conviction too. God showed her that she’d made her husband and marriage an idol and she had been wanting Dave to fill every need, when that was never the role God was supposed to have. She got on her knees as well, surrendering her expectations back to the Lord. That night became the beginning of something new—a vertical marriage, grounded in repentance and intimacy with Jesus first. When You Stop Cheering on Your Spouse Years later, when Ann shared her “booing” moment at church, she used a visual: a plant. She explained that when you're dating, you pick a healthy, vibrant plant—your husband. But after a few years, you start noticing brown leaves. you take out the clippers, thinking it’s your job to prune him. Before long, you've hacked away so much that there’s barely a stump left. After this sermon, Ann saw a couple that in the auditorium that stayed long after everyone had left. She approached them and saw an older man, head in his hands, tears dropping heavy on the ground, his wife sitting next to him bewildered. When asked what was wrong, he simply pointed at the stump and said, "That's me." It’s not that we don’t love our husbands. We do. But we’ve forgotten that change is God’s job—not ours. Our job is to water with words that bring life. How to Speak Life (When You Want to Yell) Ann admits she used to “speak her mind” freely—then justify it as honesty. But over time, God taught her a new rhythm of restraint and prayer, asking “Lord, should I say this? If yes, when should I say it? And how should I say it?” Not in an anxious way, but surrendered and thoughtful, knowing how much her words matter. Just that short prayer created space for the Holy Spirit to guide her words. One night, when Dave mentioned getting criticism on his sermons, her first instinct was to correct him (“Maybe if you studied more…”). But instead, she prayed that quick prayer—and said, “I can’t imagine the weight you carry, with thousands relying on your walk with God.” Dave turned around, pulled her close and whispered, “You are my life.” Her empathy, not critique, drew him near. Words That Heal Ann now also prays daily, “God, show me the greatness in my husband.” That prayer changes everything—because God always sees the greatness He planted there, even when we can’t. Romans 12:2 says, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” When we ask God to renew how we think about our spouse, our words follow. And when our words change, ...
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    51 分
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