The first 20 minutes of the episode are purely Love Island US talk, and hear us when we say, you NEED to be watching. Do not miss this opportunity! Down in the Valley, Jax is out of the so-called “mental health facility” and wreaking absolute havoc like nothing has changed. Janet’s on her typical BS, as is Michelle. But it’s a beautiful moment in America: a country united over our shared disdain.

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It’s a beach brawl this week on The Valley! Janet gets called a vibe-killing Karen, Zack begins to realize Brittney has moved on from his friendship, and Jax is even darker than usual. We also briefly talk Summerhouse reunion, Next Gen NYC, and Love Island US!

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Kristen checks Janet with a seemingly totally false rumor, but someone had to step up to the queen bee! The tides are turning on alliances. There is blood in the water. Plus, we go on a long tangent about our existential dread with phone addiction, attention spans, and the growing plight of terrible customer service.

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Apologies for recording delay!

Who among us hasn’t taken a quick pull in a corner of a party?! This week, we get more details and perspectives on Darkside Danny Tequilagate, and we’re still Team Nia. Let’s turn our attention to the real problematic people of the group: Jesse and Janet. On the Summerhouse side, Jesse and Lexi’s relationship ends less with a bang and more with a whimper.

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Whitney is back from Japan, and the only cure for train bento and foot spa withdrawals is relishing in the pure entertainment that is American reality TV: The Valley and Summerhouse. We discuss Brittney’s uncalled-for turn on Nia, Zach’s moral compass, everyone hating their partners, and much more.

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Truly one of the darkest episodes of reality TV we’ve seen, and we’ve seen a lot. We can’t help but think about all these dang kids! Tune in as we over-analyze childhood trauma, marital abuse, sociopathic tendencies, crippling addiction, just to name a few of the light, funny subjects we talk about. We will be off next week but returning the following week for a recap of E3/4!

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The Valley is back with fresh separations, contentious co-parenting, Crazy Kristen, and all is right in the world. Ultimately, we theorize that these men don’t know how to handle their insecurities, thus making it the problem of the women in their lives. What else is new? Similarly, in Summerhouse…we have our eyes on you, Jesse. Team Lexi.

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Happy to announce that we loved this finale! Grant chose the path of least resistance, which…we have mixed feelings about. Litia broke the veneer and showed her stronger, more sassy side, which we loved. Juliana’s character arc fell flat…did she ask the right questions and get the proper closure from Grant? Regardless, we look ahead to recapping The Valley in the off-season and an intergenerational BIP this summer!

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