Finals footy just went nuclear.

🏉 Hawthorn stormed into Adelaide, punted the minor premiers out of September, and left the Crows with nothing but tram tickets back to Glenelg. Gunston wound back the clock, Newcombe went full caffeine-fuelled maniac, and Sicily gave Taylor Walker the longest night of his career.

🏉 Up north, the Lions brushed aside the Suns in a QClash semi that turned ugly real quick. Dunkley tackled like his life depended on it, McCluggage owned the midfield, and Brisbane are strutting into prelim week like they’ve already booked their Grand Final seats.

🏉 Now it’s Cats v Hawks and Pies v Lions at the ‘G – 180,000 fans, four powerhouse clubs, and about a billion Twitter meltdowns incoming.

🏉 Plus, Ash’s Brownlow crystal ball, Rising Star tips, and just enough smart-arse commentary to keep you awake on the drive home.

🏉 Prelim weekend, baby.

🏉 Let’s ride!

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🚨 EMERGENCY POD 🚨

🦁 Well, well, well… the “most anticipated QClash ever” came with all the hype of a Marvel movie trailer — and ended like a dodgy meat pie at the Gabba. Tasted good for the first bite, then you realised you’d been conned.

🦁 Gold Coast came out swinging with two quick goals, but Brisbane just smiled, tied it up, and then flicked the finals switch.

🦁 From there the Lions pulled the Suns apart like a $2 shop deckchair in a summer storm.

🦁 By three-quarter time, Suns fans were praying for a miracle. Instead, they got the slow, painful realisation that September still belongs to the Lions.

🦁 Harris Andrews turned into a human brick wall, Kai Lohmann’s haircut stole the show, and Cam Rayner was breaking tackles like shopping centre kiosk salespeople.

🦁 Meanwhile, Suns fans were left Googling “how to cancel a membership.”

🦁 Lions march into a prelim against Collingwood, and yes, I’ve already started sharpening the Magpie jokes.

🎧 Hit play for the full Lowdown: laughs, footy, and just the right amount of maroon, blue and gold smugness.

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🦁 Ash is back, and it’s time to talk Round 5 W footy the only way we know how — with way too much Lions bias and just enough nonsense to keep you laughing.

🦁 If you’re heading to the ground or parked on the couch with snacks, we’ve got all the when, where, and how-to-watch covered. We’ll run through the ins and outs (who’s back and who got dropped like a hot rock at a day spa), and what it all means for the Lions’ chances this week.

🏉 Plus — because Ash can’t help himself — we go on a little side quest about team names and whether the AFLW best and fairest medal needs a rebrand. Spoiler: it does!

🏉 And to wrap it up? Ash’s tips for every game. They’re bold, they’re biased, and they’re more reliable than your mate cooking the snags on a Saturday arvo.

🦁 Buckle up, Lions fans — Round 5 is here, and we’re coming in hot 🔥

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🏉 Two semi finals.

🏉 Two massive storylines.

🏉 On Friday night, Adelaide face Hawthorn with history hanging over their heads — no minor premier has gone out in straight sets since 1983. The Crows could steady the ship or collapse into pub-trivia infamy, while the Hawks are rolling in with nothing to lose and plenty of chaos to cause.

🏉 Then Saturday night… the biggest QClash ever. Brisbane and Gold Coast under the lights at the Gabba, with survival — and maybe Queensland bragging rights — on the line. The Suns thumped the Lions by 66 in Round 20, but finals at the Gabba hit different. Can the Lions dig deep despite injuries, or will the Suns finally prove little brother’s all grown up?

🏉 Two blockbusters.

🏉 Two seasons on the line.

🏉 Strap in.

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*DISCLAIMER: This episode is narrated by a comedian, not a paid mainstream media expert, so don’t @ me guys*

September footy doesn’t care about your ladder position, your losing streak, or your excuses.

🏉 Just ask Collingwood, who walked into Adelaide Oval and turned chaos into a prelim berth.

🏉 Geelong reminded everyone they’re not done yet.

🏉 Hawthorn survived an Orange Tsunami from GWS,

🏉 And the Gold Coast Suns finally — finally — won a final.

🏉 Ash takes you through all four games with the usual mix of noise, nonsense and one-eyed passion. It’s messy, it’s brutal, it’s pure theatre.

Finals footy is alive and kicking — and we’ve only just started.

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Seventeen points down at three-quarter time, the Crows circling, Adelaide Oval rocking — and then Brisbane flicked the switch. In six minutes of ruthless brilliance, the Lions stormed home with three unanswered goals to pinch a heart-stopping win.

Ash takes you inside the madness: Taylor Smith’s ice-cool match-winner, Courtney Hodder’s genius footy brain, and a backline that turned into a brick wall when it mattered most. Plus: the midfield dominance, the seven-game streak over Adelaide, and why Norwood Oval should probably just be re-zoned as Brisbane’s second home.

Also on the Lowdown:

✅ Ticks — resilience, momentum, and YOU, the listeners.

❌ Crosses — salty footy media takes, the missing jumper, and anyone foolish enough to keep writing us off.

👑 Besties — the standouts who made the magic happen.

It’s passion, humour, and a healthy dose of bias — exactly what you’d expect from the only Lions podcast that screams louder than the Gabba cheer squad.

🦁 Lions Lowdown — we don’t just barrack, we live it.

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G’day Lions fans — Ash is here with another brutally honest take on Brisbane’s finals campaign.

Friday night at the ‘G was ugly. Geelong outworked, outran and outright embarrassed us, and walking out of that ground it felt like the empire was cracking.

To make matters worse, Lachie Neale’s season is done, Eric Hipwood is sidelined until mid-2026, and our premiership defence looks shakier than a Scotch Finger biscuit dipped in hot tea.

But it’s not over yet.

This group has a second chance — a QClash semi-final at the Gabba against the Suns.

No Neale, no Hipwood, but still plenty of fight left. If we’re going down, it won’t be quietly.

In this ep:

•Brutal review of the Cats loss

•The fallout from Neale & Hipwood’s injuries

•Why Dunkley, Zorko & Fletcher deserve praise

•A media watch spray

•Weird stats, ticks & crosses, top fives, and the joke of the week

Back-to-back hopes are on the ropes — but don’t write us off yet.

Brisbane doesn’t roll over.

Not now.

Not ever.

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Two elimination finals.

Two wild storylines.

Giants v Hawks — scars, stars and a rivalry tighter than your Monday commute.

Dockers v Suns — 60,000 in Perth, Fyfe’s finals return, and Gold Coast’s first ever September dance.

All the hype, form checks and X-factors — packed into five minutes flat.

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