Why You Take Things Personally (and What to Do Instead)
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Why You Take Things Personally (and What to Do Instead)
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Do you replay conversations in your head, second-guess your words, or feel a wave of shame from just one comment or look?
You’re not too sensitive and you’re not alone. You’re simply human with a nervous system doing its job to protect you.
In this episode, we unpack why you take things personally and what you can do to shift that response. This isn’t about “toughening up” or just thinking positive. It’s about understanding the neurobiology behind emotional reactions and learning how to regulate your state so you can respond with clarity, not collapse.
🔍 What You’ll Learn:
• How your nervous system interprets disapproval as a threat
• Why “story follows state”—and how to shift both
• The “slime” analogy for handling criticism
• A powerful mindset tool called the “second score”
• How to create emotional space between stimulus and response
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🕰️ Timestamps:
03:27 – Why thinking differently isn’t enough
03:55 – Survival wiring and neuroception
05:20 – Strategy #1: Critique behavior, not identity
06:25 – Separate who you are from what you did
06:56 – Strategy #2: Reframe criticism as feedback
07:44 – The “Slime” analogy for handling feedback
10:02 – Brené Brown’s arena metaphor: who deserves your energy?
10:52 – Not all feedback deserves full volume
11:16 – Strategy #3: Mind reading and nervous system state
12:20 – Story follows state: Team Hyper, Hypo, and Resilient
13:37 – The Safety Sequence: Regulate before you reframe
14:27 – Strategy #4: Track and anticipate your personal triggers
15:12 – Strategy #5: Validate your emotions first
16:07 – Strategy #6: The Second Score – how you respond matters
18:19 – Criticism as a growth opportunity
18:40 – Final thoughts: It’s not a mindset flaw—it’s your nervous system
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🧠 Explore More Tools
📝 Get my Resilience Journal to support your healing journey:
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📌 Amazon CA: https://www.amazon.ca/Mental-Journal-Anxiety-Management-Self-Care/dp/B0DNRSLV9F/ref=sr_1_1
🧘♀️ Join the Nervous System Journaling Club
→ https://www.skool.com/nervous-system-journaling-club/about?ref=06e003b61b8148ebbafd3a067f3cc2e1
🎓 Learn more:
→ The Advanced Nervous System Resilience Training: https://www.amazon.com/Mental-Journal-Anxiety-Management-Self-Care/dp/B0DNRSLV9F/ref=sr_1_1?dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.aXvnLQ5iNMBUxzQYYcrgjg.Ygo_CcAbKDLG3ax4WgUAUannnVgrozTHO0DU3k-rSfw&dib_tag=se&keywords=Mental%2Bhealth%2BJournal&qid=1748849188&sr=8-1&th=1
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