When you finally know why you attract a certain type of person in your life, who does it remind you of? I've been healing for years, when I found out who my root/roots were, it was time to start letting people go. Now, I am in mourning for my inner child, and people that are still alive. I can finally start truly healing and move on from toxic people and scenarios. The problem is toxic people don't go down without trying to take you out, I say bring it! I'm not worried, damage is done. I'm going to tell truth, no more lies, no more secrets, your reign of hell is over.

During the last month I've come across a significant amount of information. Which had me take the blinders off to my childhood. I can't go back to how I seen it before and now I'm processing. So, I can one day forgive both my parents. Honestly, it is a hard road to travel but my goal is to heal and live the next 30 years differently. 

Preparing to let go of both my parents, my root. I knew nothing but chaos and toxic co-dependency. I refuse to keep going down a path filled with narcissistic relationships, users, abusers etc. I want true happiness! So, I know it isn't only my parents, it's my whole world and everyone associated with my past.  This is why they say it's hard to heal and move on, it's the ones you have to leave behind, mourning someone alive is truly the hardest part. However, if you go back, it starts all over. It's like an addict, if you go back hanging around those type of people your chance of relapse is higher. Why take that chance. I'm looking at where I'll be, not where I've been. And let me tell you... It HELPS!

I have always had a hard time wondering why I end up with the same kind of person or kept the same kind of toxic people in my circle. It was every kind of relationship I've ever had, even when it came to business. After letting my parents go, I realized I was surrounding myself with these types of people. It all comes together once you realize exactly what it is. Just WOW! Coming to grips with how I'm supposed to move on without having anger is hard, I know I'll get there but I'm mostly mad at myself for allowing it for this long. Well, no more!