Mike calls it the downshift.

Most men don't have one.

They leave work — or close the laptop — and walk straight through the door still wired. Still in battle mode. Sword drawn. Armor on. Nervous system running at a ten.

And their family gets the worst of them.

Not because they don't love them. Because nobody taught them how to make the transition.

Mike is the founder of Men of Movement Retreats and one of the speakers at the Patriarch Summit this September. We sat down on Instagram Live to talk about the one thing costing men their marriages, their presence, and their connection with their kids — and what to actually do about it.

We get into the downshift — why most men are tired but wired when they walk through the door and what a real transition ritual looks like. The king without his armor — leading from the heart at home versus leading from the front at work. Drala — the energetics of your environment and how the state of your space is communicating something to your family before you say a word. Lead from the middle — Mike's philosophy on the dynamic nature of real leadership. And wrestling with your son — why physical play is one of the most important regulation tools a father has.

Plus a live question from a dad struggling to get his four year old down without a battle every night. We go there.

This is what the Patriarch Summit is built for. Men who are ready to stop bringing the battlefield home.

Patriarch Summit — September 11-13, 2026. Virtual. Live. 13 speakers.

GA $17. VIP $47 — recordings for life, speaker giveaways, live Q&A with every speaker including Mike.

Link in bio. Doors are open.

// Raise them up in the way

x Rob

Dennis has spent twenty years inside schools mentoring young men.

Not as a school district employee. As an outsider who can say the things nobody else will say.

The false masculinity being sold to boys — athletic dominance, sexual conquest, economic status. The pornography crisis — 85-90% of young men have seen it before age 14. More than 50% have seen violent pornography. And nobody's talking to them about it.

The phone addiction that's rewiring their brains and stealing their future — 93% of free time connected to a device. Seven and a half hours a day on average. And the anxiety and depression numbers that have been climbing since 2012 — the year the front-facing camera changed everything.

But this episode isn't just about the crisis. It's about what actually works.

Dennis left a fifteen-year career as a principal to build something better. One day a month. Ten meetings a year. Boys who were failing, fighting, and getting suspended — becoming leaders who mentor the next generation.

We talk about how to have the pornography conversation with your son. About the wound delivered by an absent or abusive father — and how to stop passing it down. About the bike riding analogy for fatherhood that stopped me cold. About the boy who thanked Dennis for the porn lesson and said he stopped — and made honor roll and the travel soccer team.

And about what it means to be the kind of man your son actually learns from.

This one hits deep.

If you got something out of it — send $5 on Venmo @robbilljr. Top supporters get official producer credits.

// Show them the way
and when they're grown
they will not stray.
x Rob

Patriarch.

Say it out loud. Notice what happens in your body.

Some of you looked around to make sure nobody heard. Some of you felt a fire in your chest. Most of you felt both.

Good.

This episode is about taking that word back — from the culture that weaponized it, the ideology that turned it into a slur, and the pop culture machine that replaced the father who leads with the father who can't function without his wife saving him.

We go back to the origin. Pater. Archon. Patriarkhēs: The father who leads. The paterfamilias of ancient Rome. Zeus energy — not the petty, reactive philanderer of pop mythology, but the integrated king who holds the vision, sets the standard, and takes full responsibility for everything behind him.

We talk about how we got here. The Industrial Revolution that pulled the patriarch from the heart of his home. The 1969 consciousness-raising meetings where women with advanced degrees from Columbia and Radcliffe sat in a room and planned — in their own words — the destruction of the American family by destroying the American patriarch. The pop culture machine that finished the job with Homer Simpson, Al Bundy, and a 2026 movie called The Breadwinner where dad can't do laundry.

We talk about what a patriarch-less society actually looks like. Not theory. The numbers. 700,000 men a year taking their own lives. Birth rates collapsing. Boys with no masculine elders finding their models in pornography and Andrew Tate. Antidepressant use up 3,000% since 1990.

And we talk about the return.

Not dominance. Not control. Responsibility. Sacrificial leadership. In the spirit of Christ.

The beit av of Chronicles — the father's house — the structure God used to rebuild a shattered people. Family by family. Father by father.

That's what this is.

And that's why this September I'm building the room.

The Patriarch Summit. September 11-13, 2026. Virtual. Live. 9 speakers.

Doors open July 1st. Link is right here

If this landed — share it with a man who needs it.

If you got something out of it — send $5 on Venmo @robbilljr. Top supporters get official producer credits.

// Train a child up in the way he should go

and when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:6

x Rob

He was nineteen years old, drunk, and coming down off cocaine after playing at a music festival in Minnesota.

And then he heard a voice.

Not out loud. In his chest. Like words being pressed into his heart.

David. Where are you?

The same words God said to Adam in the garden.

In that moment — everything came to a hilt. The alcohol. The chaos. The broken home. The woundedness he'd been running from his whole life. And he realized: if I keep going down this road, I'm going to die. Body and soul.

So he walked to a lake. Sat there until the sun came up. And gave it all to God.

That was the beginning.

What followed was eight years in seminary, a leather business built from a calling, an Australian wife he fell in love with over video calls during COVID, and a daughter who screams "Papa pick you up" in the middle of the night.

David is the founder of Oré Moose — handmade leather goods that make faith felt. The rosary pouch on my desk is his. The journal my son smelled and said "it smells like Jesus" — his.

We talk about what it means to run from God and what it takes to stop running. About faith as a relationship, not a checklist. About seminary as an initiatory process for young men. About art as food for the soul. And about building a home where faith is the natural backdrop — not something pushed, but something lived.

This one went deep.

If you got something out of it — send $5 on Venmo @robbilljr. Top supporters get official producer credits.

// Face your demons

or they'll live w/ your wife

and raise your children.

x Rob

700,000 men a year.

59,000 a month. 15,000 a week. 2,500 a day.

90 men every single hour.

Almost two men every single minute.

These are men with wives. With children. With families who need them.

And it's "Pride" Month. And nobody's talking about this.

This episode is my contribution to changing that.

We talk about how we got here. The Industrial Revolution that pulled fathers from their homes and reduced their worth to a paycheck. The Victorian era that split men and women into separate kingdoms and lit the fuse. The feminist ideology — not women, the ideology — that set out in 1969 to destroy the American family by destroying the American patriarch. And the pop culture machine that finished the job.

We talk about what's happening inside men. Why male depression doesn't look like sadness. Why men mask it with anger, alcohol, workaholism, and withdrawal. Why the mental health model we have wasn't built for men. And why strength training — not cardio — is one of the most effective interventions we have.

We talk about the way through. Brotherhood. Purpose. Faith. The transitional character — the man who looks at the cycle and decides it ends with him.

And we talk directly to the man who's standing on the rooftop doing the insurance math right now.

Your family doesn't need the money.

They need you.

If you're struggling — call or text 988. Visit HeadsUpGuys.org. Or DM me directly. I mean that.

If this episode lands — don't keep it. Send it to a man who needs it.

That's the whole point.

If you got value from this episode — send $5 on Venmo @robbilljr. Top supporters get official producer credits on the show.

// You Are More Than Enough
And This World Is A Better Place
With You In It

Jonathan Conrad was having panic attacks at work. Twins on the way. Stress through the roof. Work was his idol and he knew it.

The only thing he knew to do was pray.

Not because he was holy. Not because he had it figured out. Because it was the one prayer he remembered from childhood — and it was all he had.

He started praying the rosary every day on the way to work. Out loud. Fingers on the steering wheel. Not even meditating on the mysteries. Just saying the words.

And he didn't pray for himself to change.

He prayed for everything around him to change.

But he was the one who changed.

That's the episode. Jonathan is the founder of Catholic Woodworker — the man behind the rosary that's in my hands every single morning. We talk about what it means to be intentional with your family the same way you're intentional with your business. About the excuse of blaming your kids, your wife, your circumstances. About brotherhood, isolation, and why the lone wolf path is killing men. About Saint Francis. About beauty. About what it means to go to Jesus through Mary.

And about what happens when a man stops trying to fix everything wrong with him — and starts discovering the gifts God already put there.

This one hit different.

Get your hands on Jonathan's work at Catholic Woodworker.

If this episode moves you — send $5 on Venmo @robbilljr. Top supporters get official producer credits on the show.

// Raise them in the way

and when they're grown

they will not stray

Four months into having my son Theo — I stood up from meditation and found myself on the floor.

Hypostatic blood pressure. Dangerously high. Heart rate through the roof. I hadn't been training. I told myself I didn't have time.

That was the moment I understood — this isn't about vanity. An unfit dad is a liability to his family. Full stop.

Here's the stat that stops me cold every time. Children of active fathers are 3.5x more likely to be physically active themselves. Active moms? 2x. An active dad has nearly double the influence of an active mom on whether his kids move their bodies.

Nobody told you that you were that important.

77% of men don't meet the bare minimum federal guidelines for physical activity. 150 minutes of moderate movement per week. A brisk walk. And most men aren't hitting it. Three out of four men you know are functionally useless if they have to do something physical.

The dadbod isn't relatable content. It's a message your kids are receiving right now — about what a man's relationship with his body looks like. About complacence. About resignation. And they will repeat it.

So here are the three things every dad needs to train. Not nice to haves. Non-negotiables.

Strength. Flexibility and prehabilitation. Conditioning.

We get into all of it — how to build each one without a gym membership, in the time you actually have, with your kids watching and learning alongside you. Plus the gear system for conditioning that I used to charge people thousands of dollars to measure in a lab. Turns out your breath tells you everything you need to know.

Don't waste your money.
HomeGrown Fitness // American-Made
Rediculously Reasonably Priced

And we get into what the research says about exercise as a treatment for depression and anxiety — comparable or superior to psychotherapy and pharmacology. You're not just getting fitter. You're getting freer.

Last week's programming is live inside The Grit Collective — my free brotherhood. Link here.

If this episode hits — send $5 on Venmo @robbilljr. Top supporters get official producer credits on the show.

Om landed in Israel on October 5th, 2023.

Two days later, the world changed.

He was there. His family was there. His friends were there. And the man who had spent years learning to regulate his nervous system — who had meditated in caves in Europe, lived in India, done the deep work — was about to find out if any of it was real.

It was.

But it took months to process. Months of shaking. Months of feeling unsafe in the deepest part of his being. And it was only because of the tools he'd spent years building that he came out the other side — regulated, grounded, and more committed to this work than ever.

This conversation goes deep.

We get into the patterns men run to avoid feeling — over-positivity, avoidance, the dreamer who's always chasing the next thing instead of being here. The difference between talking about the work and actually doing it in your body. Why you can read every book, hire every coach, and still not shift — because you cannot read your experience. You can only experience it.

And we get into what it actually means to be witnessed by a group of men. Not talked at. Not coached. Witnessed. And why that changes everything.

Om is one of the most grounded men I know. He's also my co-facilitator at The Rite — June 12-15 in Nevada City, California. Only 6 spots left. 66% off

Apply at his website 👇

If this conversation moves you — that's probably why.

And if you listened, tip me $5 on Venmo.

Find Om:

Instagram

ombenavraham.com

// Persist