Hey UN•THERAPIST,

We need your help UN•THERAPIZING something. Can we judge yesterday by today's rules?

We started with a conversation about food.

If someone remixes a recipe, changes the ingredients, or adapts it for another culture… who owns it? Does the origin still matter? Or does the person who evolved it get to claim it?

Then we shifted into memoirs.

How much of what we believe about people is based on who they really are… versus the version of themselves we were allowed to see? And if a memoir reveals something new decades later, should it change how we view them?

Then the conversation took another turn…

As children, we saw the world through one lens. As adults, we see it through another.

So here's the question...

Did the rules actually change… or did we?

📌 Are we judging the past by today's standards?
📌 Or are we finally seeing yesterday with mature eyes?
📌 Are we going by the law… or by a moral code?
📌 And if it's a moral code… whose moral code? Yesterday's? Today's? Society's? Our own?

Because context may explain a decision… but should it excuse it? And if society changes, should our judgment change with it?

Join us for another session of UN•THERAPY as we UN•THERAPIZE origins vs ownership, memoirs and changing perceptions, and whether yesterday should be judged by today's rules… or yesterday's.

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Hey UN•THERAPIST,

We need your help UN•THERAPIZING something, and we've got a question...

📌 Are red flags really red flags… or are we the actual “red flags”?

It feels like dating has become a game of disqualification. We're so focused on finding what we don't want that we sometimes forget to recognize what we do want.

Then we started asking an even bigger question...

📌 Have we redefined dating?

Some people have redefined commitment. Others have redefined infidelity. Some have even redefined what it means to be intentional in a relationship.

📌 But if everyone keeps changing the definitions... what standards are we actually dating by?

Then we landed on what might be the biggest question of the night...

📌 What's the difference between intentionality and alignment?
📌 Someone can be intentional with you. They can communicate, pursue you, and genuinely want a relationship. But does that automatically mean you're aligned?
📌 If a relationship ends after years together, were you ever truly aligned... or were you simply intentional?

More importantly...

📌 How do you measure alignment before investing years of your life?
📌 Is there a barometer for it?
📌 Or is alignment something we only recognize after we've lost it?

Join us for another session of UN•THERAPY as we UN•THERAPIZE red flags vs personal filters, changing relationship standards, intentionality vs alignment, and whether we're dating for compatibility... or just hoping it shows up along the way.

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Personal Website: UncleSmileyTheDJ.com

Hey UN•THERAPIST,

We need your help UN•THERAPIZING something…

Let's start with something light…

If you bring food or drinks to an event and they go unused, is it tacky to take them home?

📌 Does it depend on the event?
📌 Is a potluck different from a birthday party?
📌 Once something enters the event, does it belong to the host or to the person who brought it?

Then somehow the conversation evolved into something much deeper…

📌 What actually qualifies someone to carry a title?
📌 What makes someone a caterer?
📌 Is it the person who cooks the food?
📌 The person who owns the business?
📌 The person who creates the experience?
📌 Can you cater without cooking?

And that led us to an even bigger question…

When it comes to professionals, how much proof is required?

If someone says they're a doctor, a chef, or a professional in their field, is experience enough? Is licensing enough? Is documentation necessary? And if someone cannot immediately produce proof, does that automatically invalidate their knowledge, training, or work?

Because underneath all of this is a bigger question…

Do you become a professional when someone grants you permission… or when your work proves it?

Have we become so focused on credentials that we've forgotten that every expert was once a beginner?

So now we're asking…

Do titles come from participation… or validation?
From skill… or certification?
From experience… or recognition?

And who ultimately gets to decide?

Join us for another session of UN•THERAPY as we UN•THERAPIZE event etiquette, ownership of leftovers, credentials vs competence, and whether professionalism comes from permission… or proof.

🔗 Connect with UN•THERAPY Podcast
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Hey UN•THERAPIST,

You know the deal, no intro, just vibes 💪🏽

Join us in this UN•THERAPY session, as we UN•THERAPIZE Gelly Gelz & Lady J’s brief stroll down memory lane from 2012, during their days working as a Resident Assistant at Florida A&M University.

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Hey UN•THERAPIST,

We need your help UN•THERAPIZING something…

Have we started attaching ourselves to second-hand trauma? Not trauma we've personally lived through, but trauma we’ve inherited through stories, social media, conversations, and experiences shared by others.

And when people share traumatic experiences, are we extracting the trauma from it or the principles that came from surviving it?

Because there’s a difference between learning from pain, and building your identity around pain you never actually experienced.

Then we revisited another conversation we’ve had before about Black businesses and discounts. 👇🏾

📌 Why does asking for a discount at BJ’s, Costco, or major retailers feel normal, but somehow becomes offensive when it’s a Black business?
📌 Is it because it’s a small business?
📌 Is it because it’s Black-owned?
📌 Or are we applying different principles depending on who’s selling?
📌 And if support is important, where does fairness fit into the conversation?

On one side, people are saying, “support Black businesses.”

On the other side, customers are saying, “If there’s a deal, why can’t I ask?”

Join us for another session of UN•THERAPY as we UN•THERAPIZE secondhand trauma, extracting principles vs pain, support within Black business culture, and the unspoken rules surrounding discounts and community economics.

🔗 Connect with UN•THERAPY Podcast
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🔗 Connect with Eu'nice McCoy
Substack: Every Moment Teaches

Hey UN•THERAPIST,

We need your help UN•THERAPIZING something, in your opinion, where’s the line between representation and exploitation?

We had a conversation surrounding the cartoon "Hey AJ" and one of the characters, Captain Durag, a superhero who wears a durag and flies around helping people.

Now, for some people, it was funny. Nostalgic even. But for others, it was offensive.

And what made the conversation even more interesting was that some of the same people who are upset about the character actively wear durags and bonnets themselves.

Once people found out the show's creator was Black, some of the outrage softened.

So now we had even more questions 👇🏾

📌 Was the issue really the representation itself?
📌 Was the discomfort connected to who was representing it?
📌 When does showing culture become exploiting culture?

Because sometimes we say we want representation, until the mirror reflects something we don’t want amplified.

So now we’re asking 👇🏾

📌 Are we upset because it’s inaccurate?
📌 Because it feels stereotypical?
📌 Or because it feels too familiar?
📌 And does intent matter depending on who created it?
📌 At what point does cultural expression become cultural exploitation, and who gets to decide where that line is?

Join us for another session of UN•THERAPY as we UN•THERAPIZE representation vs exploitation, cultural sensitivity, identity in media, and why some reflections make us proud… while others make us uncomfortable.

🔗 Connect with UN•THERAPY Podcast
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Hey UN•THERAPIST,

We need your help UN•THERAPIZING something…

Quick question: How many sneezes does somebody get before you stop saying “bless you” and start looking at them differently? Like, after a certain number, are you checking on them or slowly creating distance?

That conversation somehow led us into something deeper…

📌 What does the term “safe space” actually mean to you?
📌 Is a safe space a place where you can fully be yourself?
📌 Is it a person you trust?
📌 Is it a mindset?
📌 Or is it simply somewhere you can speak without fear of being judged?

And here’s where the conversation got interesting 👇🏾

Does a safe space remove accountability?

Or should accountability still exist inside of it?

Because some people want honesty, others want people to listen to them, others want correction, and others want comfort.

So now the question becomes…

📌 If someone challenges you in your safe space, is it still safe?
📌 Can accountability and safety coexist?
📌 Or do we only call it “safe” when nobody pushes back?

And maybe the bigger question is…

Are you looking for healing or agreement?

Join us for another session of UN•THERAPY as we UN•THERAPIZE the meaning of safe spaces, accountability vs comfort, trust in communication, and how many sneezes it takes before concern turns into evacuation.

🔗 Connect with UN•THERAPY Podcast
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UN•THERAPY Facebook Group: 🎉 UN•THERA•PARTY (Official UN•THERAPY Podcast Group)

🔗 Connect with Uncle Smiley the DJ
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Wedding Wire: @UncleSmileyTheDJ
The Knot: @UncleSmileyTheDJ
Personal Website: UncleSmileyTheDJ.com

No intro, just vibes.

Join us in this UN•THERAPY session, where we UN•THERAPIZE time limits on giving grace, and the moment compassion turns into self-abandonment.

Because grace is beautiful, until it’s one-sided, because not everyone deserves unlimited understanding, and at some point, grace needs boundaries.

Tune in as we unpack when to extend grace, when to pull it back, and how to recognize when you’ve been over-giving to people who under-deliver.

Connect with UN•THERAPY Podcast
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