SOSS opens up this week with a traumatic dog story and a tribute to Chuck Mangione. Gen X lost a lot of big names this week…Ozzy Osbourne, Malcolm-Jamal Warner, Hulk Hogan. Amy and Maya relive The Osbournes TV show. Amy rescues a kid from drowning in a pool. She’s always ready to jump into action to save a life. The ladies give you the inside scoop on the MN Yacht Club Festival with some “live” on-the-scene reporting. They take you on a tour through the music, fashion, and food at Minnesota’s newest music festival. Pro Tip: Just get the corndog. Always get the corndog. Never get the egg roll. The ladies recap performances by Sheryl Crow, Father John Misty, Alabama Shakes, Train, and Hozier. One performer is unexpectedly a big snooze, and one is a walking streak of sex, converting throngs of followers in real time. The ladies ask the question, why don’t the kids dance anymore? The gals encounter a strange phenomenon that Amy classifies as “Meet Up” behavior. Maya doesn’t know the difference between Skol and Skoal. IYKYK. FOMO for the Sunday lineup is real. Learn about the best festival exit strategy ever.

Don’t drink the water! Maya finds out too late that she shouldn’t drink the contaminated tap water in her 64 oz. tennis water jug. The water actually had a forced cell phone Amber Alert. Needless to say, she isn’t going far from home today. Amy recaps the Nelly concert after the Twins game. You can always count on Nelly! Amy can’t say a picture of the pitcher. Try it…it’s tough. Maya went to Summerfest in Milwaukee on the 4th of July. She’s never done something so not her. Long story short—she kicks it off with an interesting Uber ride, checks into a beautiful, haunted hotel, and dives headfirst into concerts at Milwaukee’s Summerfest. Maya does festival math. The lineup is stacked…Everclear, Oates (of Hall & Oats), Chicago, Frost Children, a random cover band, and Fountains of Wayne. Oates' arrangement of the song Maneater is wild! Why are people waiting in the world’s longest line for lemonade?!?!? Turns out Maya’s demographic is still old men. They love to talk to a "young gal". Also, we just want to have a hot dog at a festival, for Pete’s sake! After a lifetime of accommodating everyone, Amy finally puts her foot down and advocates for herself! Public Service Announcement: Just Listen to Chelsea Handler’s Book, I’ll Have What She’s Having. It’s a love letter to every woman. Finally, bring back the free summer concerts!

Amy went to Florida…AGAIN! She captained her own boat! Maya’s sister Melissa scored tickets to Dolly Parton’s residency in Las Vegas. DOLLY! Maya is amazed at how amazing Susan Sarandon looks in the movie Nonnas. Amy has a new dog sitter, Roger. It’s complicated. Highlight? Butt dial from Roger! The ladies review their lives in dog years. Just a reminder, Maya isn’t sentimental. Amy raw-dogs cable on vacation, and it was awful. Amy isn’t having The Cornhole Championship. Cornhole doesn’t bring Maya joy. Gen Z is not ok…but were we ok at that age? Maya reviews Chelsea Handler’s new book, I’ll Have What She’s Having. Chelsea Handler…Can We Be Friends? Approved/Denied: Bare Beating. Also, a canceled flight isn’t the end of the world.