What if being a 'good woman' is the very thing keeping you stuck?

Be nice. Be reasonable. Keep everyone happy. Don't disappoint people. Don't make a scene. And whatever you do, don't be selfish.

I followed those rules for YEARS. I stayed married for 24 years, raised 3 kids, tried harder, kept the peace and did everything I though a good woman was supposed to do.

And I was fucking miserable.

In this episode, I'm breaking down the Good Woman rules so many of us have been following without even realizing it, why leaving a marriage doesn't necessarily free you from them, and the difference between being a Good Woman, a Bad Girl and a Selfish Woman.

Because you can leave the marriage and still live like you need permission.

You can stop pleasing your husband and start pleasing your kids, your ex, your parents, your friends or the entire fucking internet instead.

Different people. Same prison.

And if you've spent your life trying to do everything 'right' and still find yourself wondering when the hell your life gets to belong to you, this epsiode is for you.

IN THIS EPISODE:

• The invisible rules women learn about being 'good'
• Why self-abandonment can feel like virtue
• How Good Woman programming follows you into divorce and your next chapter
• Why becoming the Bad Girl isn't the same as becoming free
• The difference between rebellion and self-posession
• How to catch yourself obeying rules you never consciously chose
• The questions that changes everything: Who gets to write the rules for your life?

Being a Selfish Woman isn't about not giving a fuck about anyone else.

It's about finally refusing to abandon yourself to prove that you're good.

Your life belongs to you.

READY TO STOP ABANDONING YOURSELF?

If you're questioning leaving your marriage, preparing to leave, or navigating divorce and you want me beside you through it, I now offer a small number of six-month private coaching engagements.

This is the work we do in real life: when you're second-guessing yourself, terrified of making the wrong decision, trying to manage everyone else's feelings, or you know what you need to do and can't seem to make yourself do it.

Explore Private Work with Valerie

What if burnout isn't evidence that you're doing life wrong?

For high-achieving women, burnout can come with an extra layer of shame. We think we should be able to handle it. Mange it better. Be more disciplined. Get it together.

In this episode, I'm joined by Wendy Meadows, author of Sparkle & GRIT, for a conversation about creating a life that holds ambition, meaning, joy, and the inevitable harder seasons too.

Wendy shares her Sparkle & GRIT framework and we talk about what happens when the balance gets lost, and why women have been conditioned to experience burnout as a personal failure rather than something we can respond to with awareness and empowered choice.

In this episode:

• The balance between sparkle and grit in a meaningful life
• Why high-achieving women are particularly vulnerable to burnout
• Releasing the guilt and self-blame we attach to burnout
• Wendy's definition of burnout and how it can shift you toward empowered choice
• The Groundhog Day framework for when life feels monotonous
• Bringing more joy into your life in ways that actually work for you

This is an inspiring conversation with a lovely reminder at its centre: a meaningful life gets to contain ambition and effort, pleasure and play, darkness and light. The whole colour palette.

About Wendy Meadows

Wendy is a seasoned family law attorney, former litigator, and certified life coach. She is also a mediator and author of the best-selling book, Sparkle & GRIT: Live a Technicolor Life by Finally Finding Balance, Escaping Montony, and Beating Burnout: a framework that helps high-achieving women break free from burnout and live on purpose. She blends practical strategies with compassionate mindset work to help them reboot their habits, re-ignite their purpose, and build lives that actually fit.

Wendy's Website

Get Wendy's book

Grab Wendy's FREE Sparkle & GRIT Playbook

You feel the pull. The idea keeps returning. Some part of you knows you're meant for something bigger.

Then...the other voice arrives.

Who do you think you are? What if you're not ready? What if everyone realizes you have no idea what you're doing?

In this episode, I'm joined by award-winning media personality, coach, and podcast host Christine Blosdale for a candid conversation about why imposter syndrome follows so many talented, high-achieving women into the very rooms they've earned the right to occupy.

We explore how deeply women have been conditioned to doubt themselves, downplay their gifts, and wait until they can do something perfectly before allowing themselves to begin. Christine also shares the perspective shift that can pull you out of imposter syndrome almost immediately.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why self-doubt is so deeply embedded in women's conditioning
• Why accomplished women still feel like frauds, even when the evidence says otherwise
• How perfectionism disguises itself as preparation and keeps you from taking action
• The inner pull that tells you there is something bigger you're meant to do
• Why you don't need to know exactly where that pull will lead before following it
• How shifting your attention from yourself to the person you can help quiets imposter syndrome
• Why your quirks, personality, and humanness are part of your power
• What becomes possible when you finally stop hiding and own your spotlight

If you've been circling an idea, waiting to feel qualified, or overthinking everything instead of taking action, this episode is your loving kick in the pants.

Christine Blosdale is the Expert Authority Coach - a visibility strategist and personal branding expert who helps entrepreneurs, coaches, authors and thought leaders get seen, trusted, and paid for what they already know.

Connect with Christine