We'll talk today about the interweaving of depression and knowing you matter (or mattering). In my FB group, someone asked the question, "Do you ever wish you were more important to someone than you are? Like, I know I’m important to some people but there are others where I feel like they are more important to me than the other way around and I feel bad about it. Thats sooooo stupid right?

The main answer was, “No that’s not stupid.”

How have learned you matter or didn’t matter? How is mattering different from self-esteem? Or is it? And as always, what you can do about it – meaning what you can do about it if you feel you don’t matter.

Our Speakpipe message this week is from a mom who’s very worried about her son’s drinking and alleged abuse of his wife. There’s a grandchild involved as well… I’ll have a couple of ideas for her… and for you if you’re in this situation. It’s a really really tough one.

Scientific American article on mattering

SelfWork episode on self-esteem and self-acceptance

SelfWork episode on trauma bonding

Mayo Clinic article on interventions with people who struggle with alcohol

Have you been putting off getting help? It's 2024, and BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

Suicide is discussed in this episode. Here is the link to the suicide prevention text hotline.

"My bipolar disorder almost killed me." These are the words of Gabe Howard as he talked about his life with bipolar disorder. He's also an award-winning podcast host, author, and sought-after speaker. And he's someone that so many admire for his openness and knowledge around mental health issues - including me. In this episode, he talks about the ins and outs of being bipolar and passes on vital information about how to have a great life with bipolar!

In 2003, he was diagnosed with bipolar and anxiety disorders after being committed to a psychiatric hospital. It took him four years to begin to understand and cope effectively with his illness. But he's gone on to act as a huge advocate for mental health treatment.

Gabe hosts the weekly Inside Mental Health podcast for Healthline Media and is the author of Mental Illness is an Asshole and Other Observations.

Click HERE for the NEW fabulous offer from AG1 – with bonus product with your subscription!

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!

The Surgeon General Vivek Murthy has stated that there is an epidemic of loneliness in the United States and the World Health Organization has declared it as a pressing global health threat, with a mortality effect equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day. In this episode, we’ll talk about loneliness, how simple acts of empathy can be vital to healing loneliness, and "the power of eight minutes" - a way of communicating about needing help, as suggested by thought leader Simon Sinek.

In our email segment,I’m going to read a response one of my blogposts received a few months ago – from a partner who watches his wife dealing with enmeshment with her mom – and what kinds of problems that has caused.

Scripps News article: Why Are Americans Spending More Time Alone

New York Times Article on happiness phone call challenge

Simon Sinek post on the power of the eight minute phone call

SelfWork podcast on enmeshment

Have you been putting off getting help? It's 2024, and BetterHelp, the #1 online therapy provider, has a special offer for you now!

You can hear more about this and many other topics by listening to my podcast, SelfWork with Dr. Margaret Rutherford. Subscribe to my website and receive my weekly newsletter including a blog post and podcast! If you’d like to join my FaceBook closed group, then click here and answer the membership questions! Welcome!

My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.

And there’s another way to send me a message! You can record by clicking below and ask your question or make a comment. You’ll have 90 seconds to do so and that time goes quickly. By recording, you’re giving SelfWork (and me) permission to use your voice on the podcast. I’ll look forward to hearing from you!