What looks like “bad behavior” is often a nervous system asking for help. The parents learned that curiosity opens doors that control never will. And they learned that addressing the real problem, not just the visible behavior, changes everything.

This is what the CPS model does so well. It doesn’t ask families to choose between safety and growth. It builds a bridge between them. It honors a child’s need for autonomy and protection while gently teaching the skills required to navigate a world that will always include challenges.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

Every so often, a story comes into my practice that highlights something important about human behavior, trauma, and the parts of us that drive harmful actions.

I worked with a client I'll call Cassandra. Her former partner, whom I'll call Keith, showed patterns of behavior so aligned with what Martha Stout describes in The Sociopath Next Door that I found myself returning to the book's insights again and again.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

He said it quietly, almost apologetically, during a Family Counseling Intensive: “I know my parents care about me, but I don’t feel cared for.”

I could see the words stop his parents in their tracks. Of course they cared. They worried, thought deeply, and talked about their kids constantly. They had invested significant time, energy, and resources into this Intensive precisely because they cared.

And yet, something essential was missing.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

I want to tell you about a couple I worked with recently during a Couples Counseling Intensive.

Let’s call them Ozzie and Harriet.

They were long-married, thoughtful, deeply committed to one another, and genuinely invested in their relationship. They weren’t in crisis. There was no betrayal, no looming breakup. But something subtle and persistent had been wearing on them.

Harriet had been feeling increasingly anxious as they prepared to complete a big project together. Ozzie, on the other hand, felt unfairly criticized. He experienced Harriet’s anxiety as blame—like she was holding him responsible for not solving a problem fast enough or well enough.

They both wanted relief. But even more than that, they wanted to find their way back to understanding each other.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

When Heated Rivalry exploded into the cultural consciousness, people kept asking the same incredulous question. How is it that an M/M hockey romance has resonated so deeply with women across the world?

But sitting with it, really sitting with it, the answer feels less surprising and more inevitable. This story didn’t just arrive at the right moment. It named a truth that we’ve kept locked away for a very long time.

Shane and Ilya didn’t just give us a love story. They gave us a model of desire without shame and commitment without self abandonment. Millions of women saw themselves and said YES, because it finally told their truth.

If Heated Rivalry stirred longing, grief, or a quiet “why don’t we have that” in you, please hear this. That response is not silly or unrealistic. It’s information.

This is exactly what my Couples Counseling Intensives are designed to support.

I work with couples who feel stuck as roommates, separated by emotional distance or quiet resignation, and help them move back into authentic connection, desire, and real intimacy - connection that is lived, embodied, and sustainable in your actual relationship.

This work is brave.

It’s deeply vulnerable.

And it is possible.

Learn more here: https://ashevillefamilycounseling.com/couples-intensives/

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

In the intricate tapestry of human relationships, the impact of early attachment trauma often remains hidden — shaping our experiences in profound, yet often invisible, ways.

Attachment trauma refers to the wounds we carry from our earliest relationships with caregivers — moments when our need for love, safety, or connection went unmet. These wounds are not just memories. They live in the body. They shape how we perceive threat, how we regulate emotion, and how we connect with others — especially with those we love most.

Today, I want to share the story of a couple I had the privilege of working with in a 3-day Couples Counseling Intensive. Their names have been changed, but the transformation they experienced is very real.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

Today’s episode is a personal reflection on something I see again and again in my work with clients: the way relational trauma lives in the body — and how safety, not insight, is the real foundation of healing.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.

Today, I want to talk about something that may feel achingly familiar if you’ve ever watched someone you love suffer… and felt powerless to stop it.

It’s a reflection on grief, presence, and the profound difficulty—and transformative power—of simply staying with someone in their pain, without trying to fix it.

The story I’ll share is deeply personal. And it’s also universal.

The Repair Your Relationship Podcast is hosted by Stacey Curnow, a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor and Relationship Specialist, and founder of Asheville Family Counseling.