Welcome to the very first episode of The Late Kickoff with Jim Martin, your twice-monthly, late-night–style audio comedy deep dive into the heart—and hilarity—of Arsenal FC. In this pilot, we introduce our signature segments, beloved characters, and our custom 80s synth-pop theme that sets the mood.

We kick off with our original 80s synth-pop theme—neon arpeggios and gated drums—transporting you straight into The Late Kickoff studios inside the Emirates Stadium VIP Lounge. Think retro warmth meets football fever as pulsating keys build to a glorious sonic crest.

Host Jim Martin (navy suit, burgundy tie, five-o’clock shadow) steps up to the mic with his signature blend of razor-sharp wit and genuine Gooner passion. He skewers the week’s VAR controversies, toasts Stina Blackstenius’s match-winning magic, and drops off-the-cuff quips that only a bitter smooth cold brew coffee can fuel.

Racing in next are siblings Ella Martin-Yoon (troublesome third grader) and Odin Martin-Yoon (starting inverted-left winger for his sixth-grade school team). Their rapid-fire rundown covers transfer rumors, tactical tweaks from the training ground, and the most viral fan memes of the week—all in under three minutes.

In our “safe space,” co-host Ingrid Yoon (slate gray suit and fake psychiatrist degree) leads a confessional with two very different guests:

• ​Wally from Islington, the die-hard superfan with a million-mile grin and a backward beanie
• ​Rachel Yankey, Arsenal legend and actual football expertThey unpack derby-day jitters, share their most mortifying match-day moments, and discover that sometimes, even therapy can’t cure Gooner anxiety.

Jim and Ingrid welcome Stina Blackstenius, heroine of the Champions League final. Over candid banter, Stina reveals her pre-kick rituals, the split-second mindset that froze the keeper, and a hilarious behind-the-scenes story about her celebratory foam-cookie snack.

What if Arsenal’s season went wildly off track? In this sketchy, tongue-in-cheek segment, the cast and guests dream up doomsday dramas—from relegation shockwaves to mug-design scandals—proving that sometimes the only cure for Gooner panic is a good laugh.

Ingrid Yoon returns with a thoughtful send-off, weaving together the episode’s top themes—resilience, rivalry, and why the Emirates faithful always believe.

Our 11-year-old poet laureate Odin Martin-Yoon closes with a dry, ironic poem about living—and sometimes bleeding—red and white. It’s heartfelt, it’s witty, and it’ll stick in your head long after the closing notes.

We round out with a final burst of that synth-pop theme, shout out the crew, remind you to subscribe on Spotify and Apple, and invite you to grab your official TLK mug.

Don’t miss a beat! Subscribe now to The Late Kickoff with Jim Martin for your bi-monthly fix of Arsenal insights, satirical sketches, and pure football fun.

1. ​Title Sequence 2. Monologue 3. Arsenal News Update 4. Group Therapy 5. The Interview 6. Worst Case Scenario 7. Final Word 8. Odin’s Ode 9. End Credits 10. End Credit Bonus