Entrepreneur couples often face a unique challenge: one partner's ambition accelerates while the other feels stuck, left behind, or forced to keep up. In this episode, Marie (intimacy coach) and Adam (business coach) get personal about the times their own growth was mismatched — and what they learned about mindset, attachment, and control along the way.

Key Discussion Points:

Adam's Ironman training story and how it triggered feelings of abandonment for Marie

What a "fixed mindset" really is — and how it often traces back to childhood safety patterns

Carol Dweck's growth vs. fixed mindset research and how it applies to relationships

Why growing apart (not cheating) is a leading cause of marriage breakdown

Anxious attachment and why a partner's growth can feel like a threat

The Michelangelo phenomenon: how great couples sculpt each other into their ideal selves

Letting go of control vs. trying to "fix" your spouse

The Dolly Parton example of supporting a partner's individual growth

A practical exercise: the Vivid Vision practice for growth-minded couples

Introducing the SPARK framework for weekly relationship check-ins

Resources Mentioned:

Mindset by Carol Dweck

Vivid Vision by Cameron Herold

Free Couples Connection Workbook (SPARK framework) — link in description

Connect with Startup Spouses:

Subscribe for weekly episodes on building a thriving relationship and a thriving business — at the same time.

Show Notes / Key Topics:

• Why flirting fades after the honeymoon phase and why couples "forget how to flirt"

• The link between stress/survival mode and loss of playfulness

• Research: Frisbee & Booth (2012) study on flirting, satisfaction, and commitment in 164 couples

• The Gottman Institute's concept of "bids for connection" and marriage outcome predictions

• Debunking the myth that flirting only happens at the start of a relationship

• How to identify your personal flirting style (touch, humor, sensual, subtle/polite)

• Navigating misalignment when one partner is more flirtatious than the other

• Why flirting is a bridge between "safety" and "play" (SPARK framework)

• Practical homework: how to start flirting again this week, without pressure or expectation

• The difference between spontaneous flirting (daily life) and structured relationship check-ins

Call to Action:

Enjoyed this episode? Share it with your spouse or a friend, subscribe for more episodes, and download the free Connection Workbook (linked in show notes) for a weekly guide to deepening intimacy and connection with your partner.

Suggested Tags/Keywords: flirting in marriage, relationship advice for couples, Gottman Institute bids for connection, marriage communication, intimacy coaching, business couples, keeping the spark alive, relationship maintenance, couples therapy podcast, SPARK framework

https://www.startupspouses.co/free-workbook-download

Marie and Adam tackle one of the biggest myths in relationships: that intimacy should just happen automatically. In this episode, they break down why waiting for spontaneous connection often leads to disappointment — and how intentional scheduling can actually increase spontaneity.

In this episode:

• Good news check-in: 4th of July reflections and an exciting quarterly business meeting

• The myth of "automatic intimacy" and where it comes from (hello, 90s rom-coms)

• Why consent conversations are ongoing alignment discussions, not one-time talks

• The different types of intimacy: intellectual, physical, and emotional — and knowing your own style

• Why scheduling intimacy actually creates more spontaneity, not less

• The importance of aftercare — even outside of BDSM contexts — for processing intimate experiences

• What to do when only one partner is willing to have these conversations

• Core values shout-outs: continuous growth and play

Key takeaway: Intimacy isn't something you're supposed to just "know." It requires ongoing, intentional conversation — about wants, needs, and boundaries — repeated often, not just once.

Resources mentioned:

• Free weekly connection workbook for entrepreneurial couples (link in show notes)

Subscribe, rate, and share this episode with a couple who could use this conversation.

In this special "Ask Us Anything" episode of Startup Spouses, Marie and Adam tackle real questions from listeners about building stronger relationships while running a business together. They open with their weekly personal and professional good news, then dive into three big listener questions:

"How do I get my spouse to agree to a weekly meeting?" — Marie and Adam share the personal story of how they came to adopt a weekly connection ritual, and break down why framing a meeting around connection (not accountability) is the key to getting buyin from a reluctant spouse.

"How do I connect with a spouse who isn't giving anything back?" — They unpack the many reasons a partner might feel disconnected (stress, health, hormones, medication) and explore the importance of clear communication, empathy, and being open to receiving connection, not just giving it.

"We're too busy and chaotic for a weekly meeting — how do we fit it in?" — Adam gets blunt about ownership and prioritization, introducing his "energy x efficiency = time" framework, while Marie shares how structure and routine (meal prep, wardrobe, planning ahead) reduce daily chaos and free up space for connection.

They close out with their "Highlights" segment, celebrating each other's core value moments from the week, and remind listeners to download their free Weekly Connection Workbook to start building this habit in their own relationship.

Show Notes / Timestamps

Good news check-in — professional wins and the power of daily lunch dates

Ask Us Anything #1 — How to get your spouse on board with weekly meetings

Ask Us Anything #2 — What to do when you feel like you're giving more than you're getting Ask Us Anything #3 — Making time for connection when life is chaotic

Highlights — Weekly core value shout-outs (Play)

Free download: Weekly Connection Workbook — link in show notes

Calls to Action

• Subscribe and share this episode with a friend who might need it

• Send in your own questions via Instagram/YouTube @startupspouses or in the comments for a future "Ask Us Anything"

• Download the free Weekly Connection Workbook to start your own meeting rhythm "How do I get my spouse to agree to a weekly meeting?"

Episode Summary

Marie and Adam open with personal and professional good news — including celebrating a successful first keynote together where they delivered their SPARK Framework (Safety, Play, Alignment, Rhythms, and Kaizen) — before diving into a candid conversation about how pop culture, romantic comedies, and porn have shaped our understanding of sex and sexuality, often in unhealthy ways.

What We Cover

• How sex education in the '80s and '90s was woefully incomplete — from banana-and-condom videos to scrambled late-night TV

• Why romantic comedies are considered "porn for women" — and how they set unrealistic expectations about spontaneity, desire, and relationships

• The role shame plays in sexual behavior and how suppressing sexual education can actually lead to more unhealthy outcomes

• How learning from pop culture (instead of real education) leaves both men and women with distorted views of sex, consent, and pleasure

• The connection between sexual openness and a stronger relationship — and how that spills into your business if you're an entrepreneurial couple

• Why scheduling sex isn't unromantic — it's practical

• How Marie and Adam went from intimacy once or twice a month to many times per week by normalizing open, honest conversations

Resources Mentioned

• 📺 The Diary of a CEO featuring Dr. Rachel Rubin (urologist)

• 🎙️ Sex With Emily — Emily Morse

• 🎙️ Shameless Sex podcast

• 🎙️ Where Should We Begin? — Esther Perel (also has a podcast)

• 📚 Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel

• 💻 OMGYes.com — research-based resource on women's pleasure

Core Values Spotlight

Each week, Marie and Adam highlight where their spouse lived out one of their shared core values: Continuous Growth, Play, Openness & Honesty, and Connection.

This week: Adam recognized Marie for Continuous Growth — owning the stage at their first keynote. Marie recognized Adam for Openness & Honesty — being vulnerable during a significant family transition at home.

Free Resource

Download the Weekly Connection Workbook — the exact tool Marie and Adam use in their own weekly relationship meetings. It includes the right prompts and agenda to spark deeper connection, communication, and continuous growth as a couple.

👉 Link in show notes

Connect with Startup Spouses

If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend! Growing this community is how more entrepreneurial couples discover that a strong relationship fuels everything else — including a stronger business.

In this solo episode, Marie opens up about her personal journey — from a teenage moment when her therapist celebrated her sexuality instead of shaming it, to the gradual burial of that vibrant part of herself through the pressures of motherhood, cultural expectations, and self-numbing.

Marie shares how a podcast about sex and intimacy sparked a "thawing out" — and how reclaiming that one buried part of herself brought back far more: her playfulness, creativity, adventurousness, and aliveness. She also gets real about what came with it — the anxiety she'd buried right alongside the joy.

The core message: when you selectively mute a part of yourself, you mute all of yourself. And the path back isn't in your head — it starts in your body.

In this episode, Marie covers:

• Why she buried her sensual, passionate self after becoming a mother

• How numbing one part of yourself numbs everything

• What finally sparked the "thaw" — and what surprisingly came with it

• Why intimacy with a partner starts with intimacy with yourself

Practical homework — a body-based daily practice:

• Take a deep breath to arrive in your body, not your head

• Tell yourself: "It's safe to be here" — repeat as needed

• Visualize your favorite safe place with full sensory detail (sand, waves, sun, wind)

• Practice 5–15 minutes daily, ideally in the morning or during a stressful midday moment

Discomfort during this practice isn't a sign you're doing it wrong — it means you're doing it right.

Adam will be back next week. If this episode resonated, share it with someone who needs it.

Download our Weekly Spousal Meeting Agenda startupspouses.co/free-workbook-download

Most people think confidence is a mindset. It's not. It lives in your body.

In this episode of Startup Spouses, intimacy coach Marie and business coach Adam break down the concept of embodied confidence — and why affirmations, pep talks, and "fake it till you make it" fall flat without it.

Marie shares her raw, personal story of learning to distrust her own body starting in puberty, battling an eating disorder as a mother, and how those messages quietly sabotage intimacy, self-worth, and even business decisions. Together, they lay out a practical path to reconnecting with yourself — from breathwork and body scans to visualization and building what Adam calls a "Reflection Reservoir."

Whether you're struggling in your relationship, feeling disconnected from your partner, or making fear-based decisions in your business — this conversation will change how you think about confidence forever.

In this episode: 00:00 — What even is embodied confidence?

The difference between confidence in your head vs. your whole nervous system being online

The dark side of "intellectual confidence" — why it becomes arrogance without humility

How women are conditioned to distrust their bodies (and what that costs them)

Why being "in your head" ruins intimacy — and boardroom decisions

Body scan: the simplest place to start reconnecting

Breathwork, music & movement as embodiment tools

The Superman pose & posture hacks that actually work Visualization that engages ALL your senses (not just pictures)

Adam's Reflection Reservoir: your personal bank of wins to draw on

How to process rejection without letting it destroy your confidence

Embodied confidence = presence. Anxiety = future. Shame = past.

Why strong relationships and strong businesses go hand in hand

Free Resource mentioned: 👉 Download the free Connection Workbook — a weekly check-in guide for entrepreneur couples startupspouses.co/free-workbook-download

check out our FREE workbook here!!! startupspouses.co/free-workbook-download

Marie and Adam get vulnerable and go deep — sharing their personal psilocybin journeys as a couple navigating trauma, generational patterns, and major life transitions. From setting intentions to facing their darkest fears in the experience itself, they walk through what it's really like to pursue psychedelic-assisted healing in a therapeutic setting. Raw, honest, and not what you'd expect.

Note: This is a personal account only. Marie and Adam are not licensed therapists or medical professionals. Always consult a qualified professional before exploring any therapeutic treatment.

Full Show Notes:

In this episode, Marie and Adam open up about something they've never shared publicly — their individual psilocybin journeys and what led them there.

After years of therapy, major life transitions, advocating for their kids through serious health challenges, and leaving a fourth-generation family business, both found themselves stuck. Talk therapy could only go so far. So they each worked with a licensed guide in a legal therapeutic setting to explore what plant medicine could unlock.

What they cover:

• Why they each decided to pursue psilocybin therapy after years of traditional talk therapy

• The role of shame, generational trauma, and self-sabotage in holding entrepreneurs back

• How to set intentions (and why turning them into expectations will derail you)

• What Marie's experience was like — and why guardedness was her biggest barrier

• Adam's two sessions: descending into a hellscape the first time, and going even deeper the second

• Why the healing happened after the experience, not during it

• The "confidence gap" and why entrepreneurs pushing outside their comfort zone need emotional tools, not just business strategy

Resources mentioned:

• How to Change Your Mind by Michael Pollan

• Tim Ferriss's work on psychedelics and PTSD treatment for veterans

Disclaimer: Marie and Adam are not licensed therapists, doctors, or psychedelic guides. This episode is a personal account only. If you're considering psilocybin therapy, please consult a qualified medical professional and licensed guide in your area.check out our FREE workbook here!!! startupspouses.co/free-workbook-download