The High Conflict Blueprint | For Stepmoms Dealing with a Toxic or Narcissistic Ex

There's a common trap you might recognise. You might even be in it right now.

I call it 'Invisible and Blamed'.

Essentially, you do all these things for your stepkids – you remember the sports uniform, you sort dinner, you help with homework, school pickups, washing, schedule changes. And nobody really notices what you do. It becomes invisible.

Until something goes wrong. Or, more accurately, until the ex complains that something went wrong. Then suddenly everybody notices. And apparently it's your fault.

It wouldn't be so bad if your partner wasn't in on it too. He just seems to go along with whatever the ex says, to “keep the peace". So you decide "Well fine, I'm not helping anymore. Do it all yourself". Or you just quietly seethe.

But neither of these is really working is it.

So what do you actually do? I'm going to show you today.

👉 Episode Show Notes

🔍 Not sure if your partner's ex is truly high conflict or just difficult? Knowing makes all the difference. Take my quiz – you’ll know in 2 minutes: highconflictblueprint.com/quiz

📩 Join my list. My emails are where I share things I don't share anywhere else (because I don’t just teach this stuff, I actually live it). Join here: highconflictblueprint.com/email

🎙️Got a question or situation you'd like me to cover on the podcast? Tell me here: highconflictblueprint.com/questions

Heads up: I’m a certified coach. Everything I share is for educational purposes. It is not a substitute for professional legal or mental health advice.

What do you do when your stepchild comes back from their mother's and is suddenly cold towards you?

The kid was fine when she left. Now she's barely speaking to you. She doesn’t want a hug. She seems irritated by you just being there.

And now you're thinking, “Is her mother turning her against me?”

It’s the hurt of being rejected. The fear that her mother is brainwashing her. The fear that your partner can’t or won’t do anything about it.

And often, the things we do to try to fix it can actually make the situation worse.

Today I’m talking about what could be going on when your stepchild comes home like a different child, and what actually helps.

👉 Episode Show Notes

🔍 Not sure if your partner's ex is truly high conflict or just difficult? Knowing makes all the difference. Take my quiz – you’ll know in 2 minutes: highconflictblueprint.com/quiz

📩 Join my list. My emails are where I share things I don't share anywhere else (because I don’t just teach this stuff, I actually live it). Join here: highconflictblueprint.com/email

🎙️Got a question or situation you'd like me to cover on the podcast? Tell me here: highconflictblueprint.com/questions

Heads up: I’m a certified coach. Everything I share is for educational purposes. It is not a substitute for professional legal or mental health advice.

Have you ever looked at something the ex has done and thought...

“What the f*ck??”

She makes decisions without your partner and then complains that she has to do everything. She bangs on about how much the kids hate you when they’ve been perfectly fine with you.

It makes no sense.

But today I want to show you that a lot of her behaviour actually does make sense – if you know the story she's telling herself.

The story about who she is, who you are, who your partner is, how she’s been wronged…

Because this story connects together everything she does. And if you understand what it is, it can make dealing with her a whole lot less frustrating.

Today I’ll show you how to find that story.

👉 Episode Show Notes

🔍 Not sure if your partner's ex is truly high conflict or just difficult? Knowing makes all the difference. Take my quiz – you’ll know in 2 minutes: highconflictblueprint.com/quiz

📩 Join my list. My emails are where I share things I don't share anywhere else (because I don’t just teach this stuff, I actually live it). Join here: highconflictblueprint.com/email

🎙️Got a question or situation you'd like me to cover on the podcast? Tell me here: highconflictblueprint.com/questions

Heads up: I’m a certified coach. Everything I share is for educational purposes. It is not a substitute for professional legal or mental health advice.