Have you ever wondered why certain things bother you so deeply, even when they don't seem to affect other people the same way?

Maybe someone doesn't return your call, and you immediately wonder if you've done something wrong. Maybe a little criticism leaves you questioning yourself for the rest of the day. Or maybe you've become so accustomed to being the strong one, the dependable one, the one everybody can count on, that you don't even recognize how much it's costing you.

In this episode, we're talking about core wounds. Those emotional injuries that often begin early in life and shape what we believe about ourselves, other people, and even God. Sometimes these wounds come from what happened to us. Other times, they come from what we needed that never happened.

And because we haven't recognized or addressed them, we've learned to cover them up with achievement, productivity, independence, and all the other ways we try to protect ourselves from being hurt again.

But just because you've buried a wound doesn't mean it has healed.

I want to invite you to begin paying attention to what you've been carrying, what you've been believing, and what your pain may be trying to communicate. We're going to spend the next few episodes unpacking these wounds, because I believe there's freedom on the other side of facing what we've been taught to hide.

Life Work

This week, I want you to start paying attention to the things you tell yourself when something hurts, disappoints, or upsets you.

Do you find yourself saying things like, "Nobody ever shows up for me," "I always have to do everything myself," or "I can never count on anybody"?

Notice those always and never statements. Write them down if you can.

Don't judge yourself or rush to change them. Just get curious about what you've been believing and where those beliefs may have come from.

Because sometimes what hurts today is touching a wound you've been carrying for years.

Have you ever known there was more in you, but for some reason, you keep holding yourself back?

You know God has given you gifts. You know there are things you’re capable of doing. You may even have opportunities right in front of you, but something inside keeps telling you that you’re not quite good enough, ready enough, talented enough, or whatever enough.

I know that feeling.

In this episode, I’m sharing something I’ve been recognizing in my own life through my relationship with music and singing. I’ve been singing practically my whole life, and yet somewhere along the way, I started believing that other people were better than me. No one necessarily told me that. It was a story I told myself, believed, and eventually started living from.

And that story did more than affect how I saw my talent. It affected the opportunities I was willing to accept. I actually auditioned for a lead role in high school, got the part, and turned it down because being in the background felt safer than being seen.

Sometimes what keeps us from becoming who God created us to be isn’t what’s happening around us. It’s what’s happening within us.

The lies we’ve believed. The wounds we’ve buried. And the tactics we’ve learned to protect ourselves that may have once felt safe, but are now keeping us small.

This episode is about beginning to recognize those patterns and asking whether the identity you’ve been living from is actually who you are, or simply who you learned to be.

Because maybe you really are enough. Maybe you really do have enough. And maybe God really has created you for more.

Life Work

Identify three things:

One lie you’ve been telling yourself.
One wound you’ve been hiding.
One tactic you’ve been using to protect yourself that may no longer be serving you.

Then see if you can find the thread connecting them.

What have they caused you to believe about who you are? And what might change if you started believing that you really are enough, you really do have enough, and God has actually created you for more?

I have a confession. After spending the last few episodes talking about pain and learning to pay attention to what I need, I had to actually live it.

And it wasn’t nearly as easy as I made it sound.

I found myself dealing with a situation I couldn’t fix, couldn’t control, and honestly just wanted to be over. I was frustrated. I was angry. I was anxious. But what surprised me most was that I felt ashamed for feeling any of it. Somewhere along the way, I had picked up this idea that if I really trusted God, I shouldn’t be anxious. I should just pray, believe His Word, and be okay.

But what I’m learning is that both things can be true. I can trust God and still be concerned. I can know He is good and still be disappointed with what’s happening. I can have faith and still have feelings.

So this episode is me living out what I’ve been sharing with you. No pretending. No rushing past what hurts to get to “God is good.” Just learning that God is good even when I’m hurt, even when I’m frustrated, and even when I don’t know how things are going to work out.

You're right. I left out the Life Work, which we've been consistently including. And the transcript gives us exactly what it should be: identifying one place where you've been ashamed to admit what you actually feel.

Life Work:

Think about one area of your life where you’ve been afraid to face what you really feel because you’ve told yourself you shouldn’t feel that way.

Just choose one.

Maybe you’re angry. Maybe you’re disappointed. Maybe you’re anxious, sad, frustrated, or afraid.

Instead of judging it or trying to make yourself feel something different, acknowledge it. Be honest with yourself about what you feel, and then be honest with God about it.

You don’t have to pretend with Him. And you don’t have to be ashamed of what you feel.