Why the Life You Want May Require You to Move Before You’re Ready

For a long time, I carried an image of what it meant to trust: open your arms, have faith, and wait for what’s meant for you to arrive.

Lately, I’ve been wondering if there’s something missing from that picture.

Because I don’t want to get to the end of my life and realize I was so busy waiting, preparing or trying to get things right that I never fully participated in creating the life I was here to live.

In this episode of The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, we’re talking about the stretch—that deliciously uncomfortable place where you’re not quite ready, not completely certain, and maybe a little afraid of falling on your face.

I share what a remarkably flexible yoga teacher taught me about actually missing the feeling of being stretched, why doing something at 80% can sometimes require more courage than perfecting it to 100%, and what the regrets of people at the end of their lives can teach us about how we choose to live ours right now.

Whether your stretch is making the ask, going after the bigger job, putting your work into the world before it feels perfect, reaching out to someone, or taking one small step toward a dream you’ve been waiting on, the question is the same:

What is your stretch?

And what would happen if you took one step toward it today?

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What to Do Instead of Bypassing

So if we stop bypassing, what do we do instead?

We stay.

Not forever. Not because discomfort is inherently good. And not because we need to wallow in every difficult emotion that comes along.

We simply practice staying present long enough to notice what’s actually happening before we rush to avoid it, fix it, reframe it or make it disappear.

In this final installment of Bypassing Bites, we bring the series together with a simple practice for meeting uncomfortable moments differently: notice, name, stay and choose.

What am I feeling? What am I trying to avoid? Can I stay with this sensation for just a little longer? And if I weren’t trying to escape this feeling, what would I choose to do next?

Because emotional mastery isn’t getting so evolved that uncomfortable feelings stop showing up. It’s becoming increasingly capable of staying with yourself when they do.

Your final Bypassing Bite:
What becomes possible when discomfort is no longer an emergency?

Send Erin a text

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
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Newsletter Sign-up: The Brave & Balanced Note

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

The Hidden Cost of Needing Everyone to Be Okay

There’s a difference between being peaceful and needing there to be peace.

If you need everyone around you to be happy, comfortable and pleased with you, keeping the peace can become a full-time job.

You monitor people’s reactions. Soften what you really mean. Say yes when you mean no. Take responsibility for someone else’s disappointment. Rush in to fix tension before you’ve even decided whether it’s yours to fix.

And ironically, all that peacekeeping can leave you with very little peace inside yourself.

In this fourth installment of Bypassing Bites, we look at what happens when our desire for harmony becomes a way of avoiding discomfort—and why someone else’s disappointment, frustration or disagreement doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve done something wrong.

Real peace has room for awkwardness. It has room for disagreement. It even has room for someone not being happy with you.

Your Bypassing Bite:
Can I allow someone else to be disappointed without immediately trying to make their disappointment go away?

Send Erin a text

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Newsletter Sign-up: The Brave & Balanced Note

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright