How to Stop Believing the Stories That Keep You Small

What if the loudest voice in your head isn't the wisest one?

In this special collaboration episode, Erin sits down with Tania Cervoni, host of Banish the Lies, to explore the stories we unknowingly carry about ourselves—and how those stories shape our confidence, our relationships, our careers, and our willingness to pursue what matters most.

Together, they discuss the inner critic, nervous system regulation, curiosity, perfectionism, and the surprising truth that ready isn't a feeling—it's a decision.

Whether you're a fundraiser, leader, entrepreneur, or simply someone who wants to stop second-guessing yourself, this conversation offers practical tools for recognizing the voices that keep you small and choosing a different path.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why your inner critic developed in the first place—and what it's trying to protect.
• How curiosity can interrupt anxiety and create new possibilities.
• Why success often triggers fear before it creates confidence.
• What The Big Leap taught both Erin and Tania about expansion and upper-limit problems.
• How childhood strategies can quietly shape our careers and relationships decades later.
• Why "ready" isn't a feeling you wait for—it's a decision you make.
• A compassionate way to relate to the younger parts of yourself that still fear rejection and failure.

About Tania Cervoni

Tania Cervoni is the host of Banish the Lies, a podcast that helps listeners recognize and challenge the unconscious beliefs that quietly shape their lives. Through thoughtful conversations and practical insights, she explores self-awareness, self-compassion, leadership, and the stories we inherit about who we are.

If this conversation resonated with you, I encourage you to listen to Banish the Lies and connect with Tania for more conversations about quieting the inner critic and creating a life based on truth rather than fear.

Stay Connected

If you're enjoying The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, be sure to subscribe and join The Brave &Balanced Note, my free newsletter with practical tools for emotional mastery, sustainable fundraising, and living with greater courage and ease.

And if this episode encouraged you, I'd love for you to leave a review or share it with someone whose inner critic has been a little too loud lately.

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Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

How Plants Can Help You Return to Calm, Healing, and Self-Sovereignty

In this personal episode, I'm stepping outside my usual fundraising conversations to share one of the practices that has profoundly shaped my own healing journey: working with medicinal plants.

When I became seriously ill in early 2020, I found myself searching for ways to support my body while the world felt uncertain. That search led me into the study of herbalism—a path that reminded me of something our ancestors once knew well: that many of the plants growing around us have been trusted allies for generations.

This isn't about rejecting modern medicine. Quite the opposite. It's about expanding our understanding of what caring for ourselves can look like. Alongside the incredible gifts of modern healthcare, there's also something deeply empowering about learning simple ways to support our nervous system, our rest, and our everyday well-being.

In this episode, I share:

• Why studying herbalism changed my relationship with healing
• The connection between plants, intuition, and self-sovereignty
• Four gentle herbs I reach for regularly (and why)
• How to prepare nourishing herbal teas and relaxing herbal baths
• Why slowing down and reconnecting with nature may be one of the greatest forms of self-care available to us

Whether you're simply curious about herbs or you've been longing to reconnect with the natural world, I hope this conversation encourages you to explore with wonder, wisdom, and respect.

Mentioned in this episode

Penn Herb — Quality dried medicinal herbs and supplies
https://www.pennherb.com

Strictly Medicinal Seeds — Medicinal herb seeds and plants for growing your own herbal garden
https://strictlymedicinalseeds.com

If you're enjoying these conversations about living with greater courage, balance, and authenticity, I'd love to have you join my free newsletter, The Brave & Balanced Note, where I share practical reflections and tools to help you create an inner climate that supports the life you're here to live.

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Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

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Join the community:
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👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

The Fear That Keeps Brilliant Women Playing Small

Have you ever downplayed your accomplishments, brushed off a compliment, or hesitated to celebrate a win because you didn't want to seem arrogant?

Many of us were taught that being humble is a virtue. But what if some of what we've been calling humility is actually fear?

In this episode of The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, Erin McQuade-Wright explores the hidden emotional patterns that keep so many caring, capable people from stepping fully into their gifts. Together, we'll unpack why we shrink ourselves to stay safe, how old stories about criticism and belonging shape our behavior, and what it really means to lead with confidence without losing our humility.

If you've ever worried about "getting too big for your britches," felt uncomfortable receiving recognition, or found yourself holding back even though you know you're capable of more, this conversation is for you.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why humility and self-doubt are not the same thing.
• How fear of criticism can quietly keep you playing small.
• The surprising cost of dismissing your accomplishments instead of celebrating them.
• Why you are not responsible for managing other people's emotional reactions to your success.
• A simple daily practice to help you build an internal sense of safety instead of searching for it through other people's approval.

The goal isn't to become louder, more boastful, or more self-promotional. It's to become free—free to accept appreciation, celebrate your growth, and pursue the work you're uniquely here to do without apologizing for taking up space.

Enjoying the podcast?

Follow The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who has a habit of making themselves smaller to keep everyone else comfortable.

Want more practical tools for leading with courage, clarity, and emotional resilience?

Sign up for The Brave & Balanced Note, my free newsletter, where I share coaching insights, reflections, and practical exercises to help you lead from alignment instead of anxiety.

Join here: https://brave-balanced-note.kit.com/profile?_gl=1*qniw91*_gcl_au*MjEwODgyNzI0OS4xNzc1NzY5ODE1

Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

How Unexpected Endings Can Lead You Back to Yourself

Losing a job can feel devastating. It can shake your confidence, your identity, and your sense of security. But what if getting fired wasn't the end of your story? What if it was the beginning of something far more aligned?

In this episode of The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, Erin McQuade-Wright shares her own experiences of both being fired and having to let others go, exploring why the career endings we resist can sometimes become the greatest gifts of our lives.

Together, we'll unpack the fear that keeps us holding on long after we've outgrown a role, why some of us are wired to stay longer than we should, and how unexpected transitions create an opportunity to reconnect with who we really are and the work we're here to do.

Along the way, Erin references the astrological concept of Fixed signs—one of the three zodiac modalities—as a metaphor for loyalty, perseverance, and the tendency to resist change. If you're curious about the differences between Cardinal, Fixed, and Mutable signs, The Old Farmer's Almanac offers a helpful overview of these personality modalities: https://www.almanac.com/cardinal-fixed-mutable-cardinal-signs. In astrology, Cardinal signs tend to initiate, Fixed signs sustain and stabilize, and Mutable signs adapt and embrace change. While astrology isn't the focus of this episode, it's a useful lens for understanding why some of us naturally cling to the familiar while others are more comfortable embracing change.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why getting fired doesn't define your worth—it can create space for something more authentic.
• How fear quietly keeps us in jobs we've already outgrown.
• The questions to ask yourself after an unexpected career ending.
• How work can become a distraction from your deeper purpose.
• Why life's biggest disruptions often become the catalyst for your greatest growth.

If you're navigating a layoff, career transition, or simply wondering whether it's time for a change, this episode is an invitation to pause, reflect, and trust that endings often make room for beginnings we couldn't yet imagine.

Enjoying the podcast?

Subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone who's facing a career transition or wondering what's next.

Want more tools for leading with courage, clarity, and emotional resilience?

Sign up for The Brave & Balanced Note, my free newsletter, where I share coaching insights, practical tools, and reflections to help you lead from alignment instead of anxiety.

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Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

Why Emotional Intelligence Matters More Than Fundraising Experience

Serving on a nonprofit board can be one of the most meaningful ways to give back—but it can also become one of the fastest paths to burnout if you're carrying too much responsibility without enough support.

In this episode of The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, Erin McQuade-Wright explores what effective board fundraising really looks like, why asking for money isn't the only way to advance your organization's mission, and how emotional intelligence can help you become a more confident and sustainable volunteer leader.

Whether you're brand new to board service or you've been volunteering for years, this conversation will help you approach fundraising with greater clarity, healthier boundaries, and a mindset that allows you to serve without sacrificing yourself.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why relationship-building is more powerful than simply asking for donations.
• How a culture of philanthropy strengthens fundraising across an entire organization.
• Practical ways new board members can begin fundraising with confidence.
• Why nonprofit organizations have a responsibility to support—not just expect—their volunteer fundraisers.
• How emotional intelligence helps you recognize your limits before burnout and resentment take over.

If you've ever wondered whether you're doing enough as a board member—or felt like you're carrying more than your share of the load—this episode is for you.

Enjoying the podcast?

Subscribe so you never miss an episode, and share it with a fellow board member, volunteer, or nonprofit leader who could use a little encouragement.

Want more practical tools for leading with courage, clarity, and emotional resilience?

Sign up for The Brave & Balanced Note, my free newsletter, where I share reflections, coaching insights, and practical strategies to help you lead from alignment instead of anxiety.

Join here: https://brave-balanced-note.kit.com/profile?_gl=1*qniw91*_gcl_au*MjEwODgyNzI0OS4xNzc1NzY5ODE1

Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

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https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
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👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

How cognitive distortions drive fundraising anxiety—and a simple progressive muscle relaxation practice to shift your nervous system back into ease, clarity, and authentic confidence.

Ever feel like you have to be “palatable” to donors—like you need to shrink, mask, or perform to succeed? In this episode, Erin sits down with Kelly Hint, LMHC, NCC, and OCD specialist, to unpack the difference between cognitive dissonance (the body-level discomfort of not being your authentic self) and cognitive distortions (the anxious thought-loops that fuel perfectionism, catastrophizing, mind-reading, and the “shoulds”).

You’ll hear how these patterns show up in fundraising pressure—like tying your self-worth to results, assuming a “no” means you failed, or believing you can’t be fully yourself without losing the donor. Then Kelly guides a progressive muscle relaxation practice you can use before donor meetings, after tough interactions, or anytime anxiety takes over—helping you release tension and regain steadiness.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Common cognitive distortions that drive fundraising anxiety
• Why uncertainty triggers the mind to “fill in the gaps” with fear
• How the body holds stress—and why job changes don’t automatically reset it
• A step-by-step progressive muscle relaxation exercise (quick, practical, and repeatable)

About Kelly Hint: Kelly is a licensed mental health counselor in New York, a nationally certified counselor, a nationally certified clinical mental health counselor, an OCD specialist, and the author of Kick Ass Coping Companion.

Find Kelly:

• Book: Kick Ass Coping Companion (https://a.co/d/7slRbZ7)
• Therapy: KellyMHint.com
• Coaching: CoachKellyHint.com
• Podcast: The Hint Hive: Amplifying Women’s Voices

Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

Why Other People's Emotions Keep Pulling You Away from Your Most Important Work

Have you ever sat down with a clear plan for your day… only to find yourself pulled into everyone else's problems?

In this episode, Erin shares a simple metaphor from the New Mexico desert that completely changed the way she thinks about work, leadership, and people-pleasing. Using the image of lava rock—with all of its tiny holes and distractions—she explores why so many caring professionals abandon their own priorities in order to manage relationships, smooth conflict, and keep everyone else comfortable.

If you've ever finished a workday exhausted without making progress on what mattered most, this episode will help you understand why—and how to begin changing the pattern with curiosity instead of self-criticism.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why people-pleasing is often a nervous system safety strategy—not a personality trait.
• How workplace relationships can quietly pull your attention away from your highest priorities.
• What this looks like in fundraising conversations with donors and volunteers.
• Why mindfulness helps you notice unconscious patterns before they take over your day.
• A simple question to ask yourself whenever you feel pulled into everyone else's agenda.

Resources mentioned

• Playing Big by Tara Mohr

If this episode resonated with you, subscribe so you never miss an episode, and join The Brave & Balanced Note, my free newsletter, for practical insights on emotional mastery, leadership, and fundraising without burnout.

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If you found this conversation helpful, I'd be grateful if you'd leave a rating or review—it helps more thoughtful fundraisers discover the show.

Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright

What Teachers and Fundraisers Can Teach Each Other About Burnout, Boundaries, and Being Human

Teachers and fundraisers may seem worlds apart—but underneath the surface, they're doing remarkably similar emotional work.

In this special podcast swap episode, Erin joins Betsy Burris, host of Teaching Through Emotions, for a wide-ranging conversation about the invisible emotional labor that comes with helping professions.

Together they explore burnout, people-pleasing, nervous system regulation, somatic awareness, the Enneagram, and why so many caring professionals end up sacrificing themselves in the name of serving others.

Whether you spend your days in classrooms, nonprofit organizations, hospitals, coaching practices, or any profession centered on helping people, this conversation offers a powerful reminder: the relationship you have with yourself shapes every relationship you have with others.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why teaching and fundraising attract many of the same kinds of people.
• How people-pleasing can become an unconscious survival strategy.
• The difference between compassion and self-abandonment.
• Why burnout is often rooted in emotional patterns—not just workload.
• How somatic awareness helps us access wisdom beyond our thinking minds.
• The hidden cost of tying your worth to your performance.
• Why learning to feel your emotions creates more capacity to support others.
• A simple 90-second daily practice to begin reconnecting with yourself.

Connect with Betsy Burris

If this conversation resonated with you, be sure to check out Teaching Through Emotions, where Betsy helps teachers understand the emotional and relational dynamics that shape life in the classroom. Even if you're not an educator, you'll find practical wisdom for navigating relationships, emotions, and leadership with greater awareness.

Stay Connected

If you're enjoying The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser, subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts and join The Brave & Balanced Note, my free newsletter filled with practical tools for emotional mastery, fundraising, and sustainable leadership.

I'd also love to hear what stood out to you from this conversation. Leave a review, share this episode with a colleague, or send it to someone in a helping profession who needs the reminder that taking care of themselves isn't selfish—it's essential.

Send Erin a text

Book your 1:1 Brave and Balanced Breakthrough Coaching Session here: https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

✨ Stay Connected & Continue Your Fundraising Growth

Listen to all episodes + subscribe:
https://thebraveandbalancedfundraiser.buzzsprout.com

Join the community:
The Brave & Balanced Fundraiser Facebook Group
👉 https://www.facebook.com/groups/braveandbalancedfundraiser

Book a Brave & Balanced Breakthrough Call:
A personalized 1:1 session to support your inner clarity and fundraising wellbeing.
👉 https://calendly.com/vitalistcoaching/brave-balanced-breakthrough

Learn more about Erin’s coaching & nervous-system based support:
VitalistCoaching.com

Connect on Instagram:
@erinmcquadewright