How many people have convinced you they wanted gender equality and then turned around and crapped all over their own ideology? How coherent is your own behaviour with your gender beliefs? Today I’m sharing the sad process of realising that my male best friend, feminist in theory, indulged in everything but gender equal behaviour. But oh the lessons I learned! For example, the sexist patterns in group dynamics, but also, the power and utility of anger and frustration, and of not silencing these difficult emotions.

Sources:

“The Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism” - Audre Lorde (essay in Sister Outsider, 1984);

Police violence Arte documentaries: “Au nom du maintien de l’ordre” (P. Moreira, 2020) & “Des flics à la fac” (D. Prud’homme and P. Chassagnieux, 2025).

Made by men, for men, that's the key sentence today. Disappointing, that's the key word.

An episode about the porn industry, how it’s not what it seems (or rather, how it’s exactly what it shows, non-consent and assault), how it reinforces normative hierarchies and conditions our fantasies, and how we can liberate ourselves from these traumatic images.

The dark realities of our societies are heartbreaking my friends, all I can say is best of luck accepting that this is the world we live in.

Sources:

“Closer: Notes from the Orgasmic Frontier of Female Sexuality” Sarah Barmak;

“Pornography, Men Possessing Women” Andrea Dworkin;

“Réinventer l’amour: comment le patriarcat sabote les relations hétérosexuelles” Mona Chollet;

“Sous nos regards: Récits de la violence pornographique” Collectivity;

“Le porno libère-t-il nos désirs ?” idées larges, Arte documentary;

“Que faire de nos fantasmes de violence” Arte documentary;

“Desire (la méthode) - Injustice” (a Louie Media podcast);

We’re back! An episode long overdue, aimed at deconstructing the gender binaries produced by our society. Together we’re exploring how traits, behaviors and habits are not innate, but are performances we learn in order to maintain hierarchies. Terrifying? Yes indeed. But there’s hope! If it’s all an illusion, then it means we can break out of it? Right?

“Le cout de la virilité” Lucille Peytavin;

“No validation masculine” Emma Barrabi;

"Pas mes fils- Injustice" Julie Gavras (a Louie Media podcast).

Nager dans des eaux genrées ?? En français ??? Et oui ! Aujourd’hui je vous propose l'épisode « Decentering romance (and recentering friendship) » traduit. C'est une réflection sur le trajet que j’ai fait pour décentrer la romance de ma vie, alors que nos sociétés nous incitent à tout miser sur nos couples, et comment j’ai recentré les vécus et les relations qui, à mes yeux, comptent tout autant, tel que nos amitiés.

Littérature:

“Communion” Bell Hooks;

“The Erotic as Power” Audre Lorde;

"Pas mes fils- Injustice" Julie Gavras (un podcast de Louie Media).

Facing our shortcomings is never easy, nor is acknowledging our ignorances… But it’s only by becoming aware of our own fallibility that we can create the space to hear out others’ feelings and experiences. Today we’re talking about our language, how society conditions our ignorance, and how to avoid letting our egos get in the way of listening.

Sources:

“Sexism and the English language: the linguistic implications of being a woman” Karen L. Adams and Norma C. Ware;

“Ouvrir les yeux sur l’ignorance blanche” Vivons heureux avant la fin du monde (Podcast);

“Vivre, libre” Amandine Gay;

Another episode on beauty and appearance, but this time we’re looking at how we learn to wear femininity on our bodies, and the high cost of these heavy norms. My hopes? That the stiff corsets we wear will one day help us realize just how TIGHTLY patriarchy has woven together femininity and appearance.

Sources:

“Beauté Fatale” Mona Chollet;

“Beauty is the beast: psychological effects of the pursuit of the perfect female body” Elayne Saltzberg and Joan Chrisler [from Women: a feminist perspective, Jo Freeman];

“No validation masculine” Emma Barrabi;

“Seins: En quête d’une libération “ (breasts and bras) Camille Froidevaux-Metterie;

“The body and the representation of femininity” Susan Bordo [from Writing on the body: female embodiment and feminist theory];

“Le mystère Cléopatre” Exhibition at Institut du Monde Arabe, Paris.

Ever wondered why you feel imprisoned in the beauty standards that surround you? Why we never reach the ideals society imposes on us? Well, really, it’s because they want us to feel this way, it’s all part of a sexist scheme that will get us to spend all our time on our appearances rather than actually existing. It’s another day !! It’s another episode!!

“No validation masculine” Emma Barrabi;

"La chair est triste, hélas" Ovidie;

“Le mythe de masculinité” Olivia Gazalé;

“Beauté Fatale” Mona Chollet ;

“Dataclysm” Christian Rudder (attraction and age) ;

“Age Limits: Men’s and Women’s Youngest and Oldest Considered and Actual Sex Partners” Jan Antfolk (study available on NIH-National Library of Medicine)

Recommendation: Raye - This Music May Contain Hope.

Today we’re dedicating our 20 minutes together to talking about periods, menstrual cycles, cycle syncing, menstrual disorders, birth control and misconceptions about the female reproductive system. This is the talk that schools don’t create the space for, and it’s by normalizing these topics (that impact half the population may I add) that we fight ignorance!!

Sources:

“Le mythe de masculinité” Olivia Gazalé;

“No validation masculine” Emma Barrabi;

“Abolishing chhaupadi, breaking the stigma of menstruation in rural Nepal” UNwomen.org (2017).