It makes sense for an episode on stress to follow my introductory episode on resilience, simply because, despite what many people might think, stress is not necessarily the enemy in our lives.

Consider eustress, or positive stress. This is the type of stress that motivates us, gives us a sense of purpose and gets us out of bed in the morning with the desire to achieve something. Without it, life could become rather a drudge.

The problem arises when stress moves from being an adaptive influence to something more harmful. This is what happens when the demands we face consistently exceed what we believe ourselves capable of managing, particularly when those demands continue over extended periods.

Most of us recognise that feeling. The pressure goes on for too long, we don't have sufficient time or the right tools to recover, and even when we know what might help, we sometimes feel that we have lost the control needed to get things back on track.

That combination can create something particularly damaging: a persistent sense of uncertainty. And sustained uncertainty, together with unpredictability in our lives, places an additional burden on our cognitive resources.

Therein lies an important part of understanding stress and burnout.

It is rarely workload alone that causes burnout. It is the combination of high demands, insufficient recovery, inadequate resources and the consequent erosion of our cognitive bandwidth and psychological flexibility.

These are the things that make stress problematic. And sometimes, the people most vulnerable are those who are highly capable. They can become so accustomed to managing demanding situations that they normalise exhaustion, often without recognising what it is costing them. They can also become so closely identified with their competence and productivity that stepping back becomes surprisingly difficult.

In this episode, we'll explore why that happens, how to recognise when stress is becoming counterproductive, and, importantly, some practical and important ways we can begin to restore the psychological resources that allow us to manage stress more effectively.

On a few occasions, I had the honour and pleasure of sharing an international speaking platform with the renowned American author and speaker, Wayne Dyer.

Wayne had a particularly insightful piece of advice that I think is very relevant to our discussion. He used to say:

'Never let what you do define/become who you are. If you do, when you don't, you're not!'

It's a deceptively simple observation, but one worth reflecting on.

Because perhaps one of the most important things we can do in managing stress is to remember that our identity, our worth and our sense of self should never be determined solely by what we achieve or how much we manage to get done.

You might like to reflect on that for a while.

Thanks for listening. If you are feeling stressed or anxious and would like to enjoy enhanced relaxation and calmness in your life, visit www.alanpatching.com.au and click on resources. There you will find a wide range of resources to help enhance your mental health. All are free of charge and you will not be required to provide any personal details to download them, and I have not added a follow-up pixel to the page either - these resources come with zero strings attached - apart from the request you share them with others who might benefit from using them.