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Private Audio: Future Fortunes Favor Fearless Flimflammers.

Private Audio: Future Fortunes Favor Fearless Flimflammers.

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 Thanks to the FCC, and thanks to the defunding of public radio and PBS, I thank you for your direct supportCARY HARRISON: So here we are again!Another fine morning in the land of the free—and by “free,” I mean surveilled, manipulated, and politely asked to applaud while Congress rolls out the velvet carpet for the next all-American power grab.They’re calling it H.R.1. But around here, we call it what it is: the “One Beautiful Bill.”Beautiful, like a corporate-sponsored sunset over a fracking site. Beautiful, like a data center disguised as a school. Beautiful, like a boot pressed to your civil liberties—lovingly, of course, for your own protection.Now this little legislative Frankenstein didn’t crawl out of a vacuum. No, it strutted out like a prize-winning hog at a state fair, festooned with ribbons, headlines, and the kind of bipartisan grins that only appear when something truly wretched is about to happen to you.Let’s talk about what’s in the bill. Or rather, let’s talk about what’s behind it—because what they’ve written in ink is only half as important as what’s implied in silence.H.R.1 starts like every good disaster: with “reform.” That word gets thrown around like it still means anything, like a drunk whispering “I’ve changed” to his ex-wife at 3 a.m.This bill’s “reform” is electoral. Voting, campaign finance, transparency—all the buzzwords that get interns moist and donors hard. But don’t be fooled. When they say “expand access,” they mean expand control. When they say “protect democracy,” they mean protect the machinery that pays their mortgages.See, democracy ain’t about casting a vote anymore. It’s about being cast in a role—preferably one where you tweet a lot and believe very little. The bill sets up national voting standards, sure. And while that sounds peachy in a civics textbook, in practice it means centralized databases, algorithmic redistricting, and a beautiful little expansion of federal oversight into the last few corners where state autonomy still squeaked by.But that’s just the prelude. The real meat—the black mold growing beneath the patriotic wallpaper—is the surveillance infrastructure.Hidden among the clauses like a viper in a bouquet, this bill quietly nudges the Department of Homeland Security into a new role: Guardian of Truth.Because what’s a democracy without a Ministry of Approved Reality?H.R.1 doesn’t scream about surveillance—it hums it. It hums it through “counter-disinformation initiatives,” “election integrity enforcement,” and a new federal “public information task force” that has about as much to do with the public as a gated community in Palm Beach.These fine bureaucrats, mind you, won’t be tracking foreign propaganda. No, no. That’s amateur hour. They’ll be crawling your TikTok comments, dissecting your late-night Reddit rants, and adding anyone with more than three brain cells and a working VPN to a “monitoring queue.” For “behavioral anomalies.”Translation?You thought the NSA was intrusive—wait till you see what happens when Silicon Valley interns start deciding what qualifies as subversive sarcasm.And don’t worry, the private sector’s onboard. Tech oligarchs, ever the patriots, have signed on as “partners in truth.” This means more shadow bans, more unpersoning, and a lot more bots screaming “fact-check!” in your DMs whenever you question whether Nancy Pelosi sleeps upside down in a climate-controlled sarcophagus.Let’s pause for a sip of honesty here. This isn’t a bill—it’s a permission slip.A permission slip for power to dress up like protection. A permission slip for an elite that’s already gorged on your privacy, your money, and your time to dig in just a bit deeper—under the warm glow of national unity.But wait—there’s a cherry on top.The Propaganda Clause. Now, they don’t call it that, of course. They call it “civic engagement support” or “media literacy funding.” But in practice? It’s state-funded narrative laundering.New grants to “certified news outlets,” educational subsidies for “information resilience,” and—my personal favorite—a pilot program to test “curriculum alignment” with federally-approved civic values.You ever notice how authoritarianism never shows up in jackboots anymore? It shows It calls itself “resilience,” “safety,” “equity.” And it always, always claims to be protecting the children. From misinformation. From untruths. From the crime of thinking outside the bounds of whatever the ruling party defines as common sense this week.Now, all this would be hilarious if it weren’t also a rotting gallows of consequence. Because let’s not pretend this bill came out of nowhere. It came from a polarized, paranoid, post-truth petri dish of a country that can’t tell the difference between dissent and sedition.And it’s no accident that it passed in an election year.You...

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